so i got a friend intrested in doing sets now also.. seems there are 10,000 times more hopefuls than there will ever be official SGs.. sometimes i beat around the bush. i ignore what i need to do and distract myself with something completely unnecessary... example? well my bills are piling up, im lack of sleep, and i`ve yet to really accomplish anything otherwise... i mean yes i go to work, i feed and play with my pets, i eat when im hungry... but am i really accomplishing anything? no. is anyone helping me? no. but then i think on it even more so and what is there anyone else can do when its my own fault these things dont get done.. its so stressful, and then put my family issues on top of that. im very suprized im not a worse basketcase than i am now. and it just adds to my anxiety to realize that if i seized to exist it wouldnt make a damn of a difference in this world. its not even episodes anymore its just life in general. and im poor and will probably never make it to florida or get and education. i dont want a pity party im just venting.
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you seem to be a gifted girl inside of a beautiful body. it's the gift that is important. i don't think that should be lost from sight in your struggles. i.e. don't just beat around the bush, but take a fucking hedge trimmer to it -- in all aspects of your life.