averagenobody

I just witnessed the fattest, laziest bitch (justified use of the word...trust me) in the world. I was looking out my window onto the street below and saw a car parallel parking. I was instantly hooked as I often wonder what I look like when parking, so I sat and watched. The woman had enough room to fit an aircraft carrier into the spot, so her Ford Festiva should not have been a problem. She managed to, after two attempts, get her car in the the behemoth of a spot. What happened next was the enraging part.

Said fat-assed bitch decided that she needed to park three inches behind the truck in front of her, essentially blocking that car in. Recall that the spot was large enough for the USS Kitty Hawk and there was at least...AT LEAST six feet between her and the car behind her. As she squeezed her enormous carriage out of her tiny car the driver of the now pinned in truck was entering his vehicle. He assessed the situation and realized that he would have to make a 432 point turn to get out if she did not move her car back. He rolled down his window and asked her something (I can only speculate that it was a request for her to move her car back). Her reply must have been no because he embarked on his 432 point turn, finally getting out as she sat there watching. Mind you that she had not closed the door to her car yet.

After the driver of the truck drove away the heinously rude woman walked out of sight (there is a god) only to return thirty seconds later (maybe not) to MOVE HER CAR BACK.

Now that was the kicker. I'm thinking about printing this stupid little narrative out and putting on her car, but I probably wont. I just don't feel like bumming someone out. She has to live with the fact that she doesn't know how to drive and is part of perpetuating the stereotype that women cant drive.