The following contains course language, adult situations, and explicit content not suitable for minors. Viewer discretion is advised.
Actual radio traffic followed by actual conversation. Names have been changed to protect the innocent.
A: B this is A.
B: Send it A.
A: When you finish your 15 would you bring latex gloves to the north lot?
B: Copy that.
...
B: What for...?
A: To remove a slightly used jelly phallus from a light pole.
B: ... Sure.
20 minutes later.
C: B are you in service?
B: Was just calling in service.
A: Now that you are in service can I have an ETA on those gloves?
B: do you not have them on your utility belt?
A: Negative, my kit has a breathing mask only.
B: Copy that, on the way.
*Now raining*
8 minutes later, in person.
B: So, you are gonna clean it up?
A: Yeah. Doesn't need to be here. Want to get out and investigate?
B: I saw it earlier. Thought it was too pretty to move.
A: So you thought the 4 inch jelly dick was pretty. You know it's held on there with a fluid I'm hoping is mucous.
B: is it really?
A: Yes. Wow, this is really on there.
B: It looks upside down.
A: Nope, still right side up.
B: the head on that thing is huge.
A: Yeah, look at this. It's really on there.
B: So how does it feel standing out here pulling on a dick?
A: I'm standing here, tugging on a 4 inch jelly dick, and I'm getting all wet. How do you think I feel?
B: Damn. You know, that's beautiful. You should write porn.
A: Motherfucker I should BE IN porn. Here ya go.
B: Aw, thanks. You're just gonna hand it to me...
A: I know it's been a while since you've held one that big, if ever. Don't be intimidated. It's not that big.
#JellyDicks #ShouldaBeenAPornStar