Well, to begin, I am fairly new to SG. I've known about it when I was a teenager but too young to become a member. But I always read all that I could on the front page the website allowed. I was overweight, extremely depressed, a loner, completely Goth/punk whatever I could find that was 100% opposite of everyone else. I had the pink purple green orange yellow white whatever color as long as it wasn't natural hair. I was a cutter. I was stupid. Everyone said it was a cry for attention but it wasn't I liked the pain and the adrenaline that you get right before doing it. Anyways, I was one of those lol. Of course I absolutely hated my body. You know being 16 ande having saggy DDs was retarded. But every time I got on to SG, i would be reminded to love my body because no matter what, it's still beautiful. SG helped me along the (what seemed like eternity) way. when I was 18 I lost all my weight really fast and then got knocked up with my son Danni man (my tattoo is his name). The idiot doctors almost killed me with a botched c-section that was completely unnecessary. And I'm not exaggerating when I said almost killed me, I was really almost dead. So after packing bleach gauze into my open wound until it healed it left a huge gaping scar above my cooter. And the stretch scars and saggy skin from pregnancy etc. etc. I hated my body. I couldn't and wouldn't look in the mirror past my neck. Over time things heal and got better. Lost the baby weight and am in good health. I'm not so saggy and the stretch marks are gone. But sadly, my DDs are too :-( now there just a blahze C. but the scar is still there. It looks a little better but its still huge and still just UGH! After that fiascoes and baby life turned into adolescent and everything calmed down, I started getting back on SG. This time I became a member. I had the goal of becoming a SG, to accomplish something for once and to accomplish a goal that would benefit my self conscious and confidence. It at first the site was hard to figure out a bit. Also, I am such a loner I can actually say I don't have a Facebook, twitter, instagram or whatever. I created a fb for what reason I don't know I have no friends and family..... well, yea... but after learning SG after while I realized I needed those accts to help get my face out there and all that great stuff. Shortly after joining I started searching for a photographer. Wow! Allot harder than thought! staff phtogs are virtually unreachable, the hopeful photogs who are interested live to far, unable to travel or not traveling near you. I was getting extremely frustrated with it and it was bumming me out bad. I found myself slowly becoming wrapped around SG. All I do is think and fantasize about set themes, what I would do if I ever had the blessing becoming pink, the things I would do if I successfully became a popular SG like @RADEO. If I would ever get to be in a SG book, movie, recognized by musicians, producers model talent etc. etc. omg I can't stop it is now my whole life. And I'm grossly frustrated and hurt by it too. Before I lost my internet and couldn't access SG which hurt my process of my goal allot. I only had my crappy $60 android phone that was completely out of date and the site didn't work on my phone. It wouldn't let my blogs post, pics, comment nothing. I was going crazy like a heroine addict going cold turkey. I am self-employed and biz is dead dead dead!!!!! I busted my ass for a new phone which wasn't adequate enough so I busted my ass even harder to get the surface tablet with the detachable key board. FINALLY!! I was contacted by a photographer hopeful here who lived an hour away and was willing to come to me!! I. WAS. SOOOO. ESTATIC. !!! so now I finally have a real true set!!! Omg yay yay yay yay!! Then I used a friends comp to turn in my paperwork and ids. Of course.... even though they were .jpg the site wouldn't take the uploads. So I had to email them. So I did. Shockingly, I was contacted right away being thanked for my paperwork. Then I got contacted my photos were too big and needed to be sized so @DELBRAETH (my photog) did so. So.................. waiting waiting waiting waiting and then @DELBRAETH emailed me saying that the staff are waiting for my paperwork and ids then the set will finally be in the queue. WTF!!!!! Didn't I just get a conformation they got my shit?! And why wasn't I contacted about it but he was? I am guessing they were poor quality. So I just took new pics of my ids but now I need a new model release and w9. Can't do that at the library... won't let me on the site so I can print them. Oh the humanity.... and now I'm second guessing my SG name ashes..... because it will be a reminder of my past after I become a SG. And I'm not allowed to change my name. But do I have a chance to change it since I need to re-send my releases? Or will I need to create a whole new account? This is what's going on so far. So, how has SG changed my life? Well, it hasn't quite changed yet, but right now its driving me absolutely insane. But I'm not giving up! It will fall in place eventually. I want a different name because I do plan for SG to change my life entirely. And ashes has a meaning of me right now I want forgotten for good once I go pink! I also find the hospitality on SG not so great except for the men... of course they are what make SG SG but I need some girlfriends who actually talk to me. And not girl with no pics or goal who are only on here just caz. I never get responses from pinkies as if they are too good to talk to me. I understand they are probably bombarded with comments emails and all that but from what I see on my feed, how am I any different? Or if they do reply its something snooty except shout out to @MARCELINE she is such a sweety pie! I'm on here 24/7 working on my FB, twitter, instagram, and all that good stuff being active in the groups lalalalalalalalalala.... I'm at the very beginning of it all. And I'm allowing it to drive me insane. It is truly what I am living for. SG I pray will be my ticket out of sam world and into the actual world. And sam left behind. The hospitality I am receiving though is not what I though it would be. I would be appreciative if there was a pinkie who'll help me figure this site out entirely help me put my foot into the door of social media and all that because truly, I am wayyyyyyyyyyy way way way out of date with the e- world because I'm one broke bitch who didn't have internet for a long long time let alone any friends to have A FB or twitter acct. anyways. This is sounding way more like complaining than telling how SG has changed me but truly it has changed me. It turned a very sad, pathetic, self loathing woman with no goals or plans in life something to live for. It gave me meaning to wake up everyday and actually have something to be happy and excited for instead of dreading the fact I woke up. And SG makes it easy and its real. All it takes is inspiration and determination how much you want from it and how far you want it to let you go. And @RADEO is a perfect example. So though, I'm extremely frustrated right now with the process I'm going through right now that's only temporary. It'll get sorted out soon! And when I get to where I want to be with SG, I'll re-write this homework assignment. @MISSY, you have given allot of women a very very valuable gift and I can't wait to meet you!! Much love and I'll see you all soon a whole new person! THANK YOU ALL WHO IS BEHIND SG!!! And all the members who make all the pinkies dream come true past present and future. Hope I'm one of them! MUCH LOVE!!!!
