Behold!!!!! My latest OBSESSION:
I just adore the fuck outta these little dolls!! My best friend got me into them (she has almost ALL of them!) and now Im obsessed! I've always been the weird little girl who cut all her dollie's hair into spikes and drew blood coming out of my barbie's eyes ... but now I dont even *have* to because they already come all fucked up looking!! Hahaha! I've only got one of the Bleeding edge goth dolls (casual storm) and I dont have *any* of the Living Dead Dolls. I really really want to start collecting them, so I made a temporary wishlist Me and Scarletblue opened one of hers yesterday so we could force them to have sex with each other. Ill post pics when I get them!
Sooooo ... heres my thought of the day:
Why isnt anyone ever truely happy with what they've got?
Sometimes when I go over to my best friend's house .. I get really upset. I look at all the nice things she and her husband have .. and I just *sigh*. Id give anything to be able to live in luxury like that! Nice huge bathtub with jets, huge walk-in shower with abt fifty spray nozzles, 5 different vehicles to choose from out in the driveway with their heated pool in the huge backyard, gazebo .. blah blah fuckin blah. They just bought their 15 yr old son a brand new jeep charokee .. and I dont even HAVE a car!! So that drove me nuts ... knowing that a 15 yr old kid has more than Ill ever have in my entire life .. just HANDED to him on a silver platter!
When I get envious .. it hurts my chest. Its much more of a sadness than it is a "jealous" ness. Sometimes its like a stake through the heart.
Right around dinner time .. one of those "Home Makeover" shows came on the TV .. and my friend walked in and said to me "I cant stand watching those shows .. I get sooo jealous that *I* dont have things like that!"
And it dawned on me ..
that NO ONE is ever happy with what they have, regardless of HOW MUCH they have!! Its mind boggling! Then I thought to myself "ppl are probably jealous of some of the things that *I* have .. and Im not satisfied either!" Why is that? I really wish I could learn to be content with the things I have.
Its the same way with other model's portfolio .. no matter HOW MANY great photos I produce or how many great photographers I work with .. someone ELSE always has the better portfolio! Theres always a model who's prettier than you .. skinnier than you .. has worked with more well known photographers than you, etc.
Theres always that ONE person that you compete with, that ONE person you strive to do better than. I have one of these ppl, her name is Chrystyne .. very talented model based here in chicago .. you all should check out her work at www.disco-bitch.net
What was funny was that SGMalloreigh (sp?) told me that she was always envious of *MY* photos! So it was kinda nice to know that others looked at MY stuff and thought it was good enough to be envious of. (Malloreigh is slowly but surely turning into one of my top competitors, lol!)
So now .. tell me ..
~why do u think ppl are never happy with what they have?
~who is *your* competition that you envy and what is it that you're envious of?
~what things do you think you have that other ppl might get jealous of?
I just adore the fuck outta these little dolls!! My best friend got me into them (she has almost ALL of them!) and now Im obsessed! I've always been the weird little girl who cut all her dollie's hair into spikes and drew blood coming out of my barbie's eyes ... but now I dont even *have* to because they already come all fucked up looking!! Hahaha! I've only got one of the Bleeding edge goth dolls (casual storm) and I dont have *any* of the Living Dead Dolls. I really really want to start collecting them, so I made a temporary wishlist Me and Scarletblue opened one of hers yesterday so we could force them to have sex with each other. Ill post pics when I get them!
Sooooo ... heres my thought of the day:
Why isnt anyone ever truely happy with what they've got?
Sometimes when I go over to my best friend's house .. I get really upset. I look at all the nice things she and her husband have .. and I just *sigh*. Id give anything to be able to live in luxury like that! Nice huge bathtub with jets, huge walk-in shower with abt fifty spray nozzles, 5 different vehicles to choose from out in the driveway with their heated pool in the huge backyard, gazebo .. blah blah fuckin blah. They just bought their 15 yr old son a brand new jeep charokee .. and I dont even HAVE a car!! So that drove me nuts ... knowing that a 15 yr old kid has more than Ill ever have in my entire life .. just HANDED to him on a silver platter!
When I get envious .. it hurts my chest. Its much more of a sadness than it is a "jealous" ness. Sometimes its like a stake through the heart.
Right around dinner time .. one of those "Home Makeover" shows came on the TV .. and my friend walked in and said to me "I cant stand watching those shows .. I get sooo jealous that *I* dont have things like that!"
And it dawned on me ..
that NO ONE is ever happy with what they have, regardless of HOW MUCH they have!! Its mind boggling! Then I thought to myself "ppl are probably jealous of some of the things that *I* have .. and Im not satisfied either!" Why is that? I really wish I could learn to be content with the things I have.
Its the same way with other model's portfolio .. no matter HOW MANY great photos I produce or how many great photographers I work with .. someone ELSE always has the better portfolio! Theres always a model who's prettier than you .. skinnier than you .. has worked with more well known photographers than you, etc.
Theres always that ONE person that you compete with, that ONE person you strive to do better than. I have one of these ppl, her name is Chrystyne .. very talented model based here in chicago .. you all should check out her work at www.disco-bitch.net
What was funny was that SGMalloreigh (sp?) told me that she was always envious of *MY* photos! So it was kinda nice to know that others looked at MY stuff and thought it was good enough to be envious of. (Malloreigh is slowly but surely turning into one of my top competitors, lol!)
So now .. tell me ..
~why do u think ppl are never happy with what they have?
~who is *your* competition that you envy and what is it that you're envious of?
~what things do you think you have that other ppl might get jealous of?
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-the media
-my dark side-it is so strong!
-my record collection, you could build a house outta it!