I started on methadone today. I keep nodding off. And I hear withdrawal is just as bad/if not worse. So tell me why heroin wrong but this is okay?
My best friend, Katy, is coming to visit from RI this weekend. I keep calling her but it's all "THE NEXTEL CUSTOMER YOU ARE TRYING TO REACH IS CURRENTLY UNAVAILABLE, PLEASE TRY LATER FUCK YOU" &...
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My best friend, Katy, is coming to visit from RI this weekend. I keep calling her but it's all "THE NEXTEL CUSTOMER YOU ARE TRYING TO REACH IS CURRENTLY UNAVAILABLE, PLEASE TRY LATER FUCK YOU" &...
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VIEW 22 of 22 COMMENTS
tonkakatt:
Good luck hon, I have a bunch of cousins who have struggled with heroin and methodone for years. lets see the count is: 1 dead, 1 in jail for ared robbery, 1 HIV+ former prostitute out of jail for 1 year on methadone and trying like hell to get her 7yr old son back. I wouldn't touch the shit for all the tea in China. 
ghoulish:
holyshitariel.
What the fuck, I just wrote this ridiculously logn entry last night & it's not fucking here. I guess it's better that no one had to read it but STILL.
I am dying. My stomach is killing me. But I'm getting medicine today & I'll be alright.
I might actually go to rehab next week but I doubt it. I think they forgot.
UGH I...
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I am dying. My stomach is killing me. But I'm getting medicine today & I'll be alright.
I might actually go to rehab next week but I doubt it. I think they forgot.
UGH I...
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escottie:
i wish i could have read that ridiculously long entry. you seem SO on the edge of pulling everything back into your own control, away from the opiates.
i remember when i experienced the deep dark hole. so close so close so close to understanding...i felt totally ripped to pieces by my drug, but knew it was the moment to pull to me all the warm, good feelings i had about myself. to go back to a simpler me.
YOU ARE A BETTER PERSON THAN WHAT THIS STRUGGLE GIVES YOU CREDIT FOR, ARIEL.
seek out rehab, a break from everything--don't be passive and wait for it to come to you.
i remember when i experienced the deep dark hole. so close so close so close to understanding...i felt totally ripped to pieces by my drug, but knew it was the moment to pull to me all the warm, good feelings i had about myself. to go back to a simpler me.
YOU ARE A BETTER PERSON THAN WHAT THIS STRUGGLE GIVES YOU CREDIT FOR, ARIEL.
seek out rehab, a break from everything--don't be passive and wait for it to come to you.
the_sam:
are you going to any meetings?
arielcupcakes:
sup
So I still haven't left. Since I'm not using right now, I'm no one's priority & God knows when I'll actually leave for rehab. But I'm out of pain killers, so my using status might go back to active rather soon. I don't get my paycheck until tomorrow, I don't know if I can wait that long but I guess I'll have to.
I talked...
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I talked...
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VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
triplesixer:
Hang tight.. Drink water. take showers do push ups and lots of sleep.. stay busy or sleep.. Its what i'm trying to do. We all hope for the best.
enola:
Hey my dear...I wonder how you are doing...hope you are okay... 
EDIT: I took lots of hot pictures in an attempt to cheer myself up so go look at them or I'll castrate you.
In order for my assualt & malicious destruction of property charges, I'm going to a 90 day program. I want to thank everyone who's supported me & offered advice for my addiction. I'm not exactly sure why I'm writing this to a...
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In order for my assualt & malicious destruction of property charges, I'm going to a 90 day program. I want to thank everyone who's supported me & offered advice for my addiction. I'm not exactly sure why I'm writing this to a...
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VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
frankie:
hiya honey,
thanx for the nice comments, i will be putting some more pics on asap. i have been up less than a week and i am really crap on computers so its taking me a while to get sorted. i don't know how long it will be til my set goes up so i thought i would put some of my first set up that got rejected
! and also some pics of me and my mates. i checked out your pics and they are beautiful.
catcha later
thanx for the nice comments, i will be putting some more pics on asap. i have been up less than a week and i am really crap on computers so its taking me a while to get sorted. i don't know how long it will be til my set goes up so i thought i would put some of my first set up that got rejected
! and also some pics of me and my mates. i checked out your pics and they are beautiful.
catcha later
blck_flwrsplease:
yep -youre pretty hot -if you want to run from the law and come hide out in albuquerque -you can stay with me - I love the pictures with the bandages
VIEW 11 of 11 COMMENTS
artax:
Icecream cone-shaped condoms... How awesome is that?!? 
hellomrworld:
sounds like fun .. naked jeopardy with a porn star is a diff life then mine
AWESOME. I don't know what you're supposed to get boys for Valentines Day, so I figured I'd get him stuff that I would like... For example, a Little Mermaid balloon & a stuffed Unicorn. Unfortunately for both of us, the effing balloon was $8 & the unicorn was $25. 8 DOLLARS FOR A PIECE OF PLASTIC WITH SOME AIR INSIDE. One of my creepy customers...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
cherryb0mb:
wow, but a gram a week instead of a gram a day is a really big difference. 
that's not a bad thing at all... i've been craving some myself lately, but i guess it's a good thing it's been a lot harder to obtain nowadays...
happy v-day! i want a unicorn now.
that's not a bad thing at all... i've been craving some myself lately, but i guess it's a good thing it's been a lot harder to obtain nowadays...
happy v-day! i want a unicorn now.
rubyred:
you rock, gassy girl hehehe, but im so into the honesty so heres a bick smackaroo for ya!
Yum. Bread. It hurts my jaw but that's okay.
So I think this weekend I'm going down to Woodbridge to meet Angela & then we're going up to Philly. Sigh. I'm not supposed to be there without Asher. It feels wrong, & I know I shouldn't be going but... I don't know. I think I should focus on constipation as a reason to stop.
I...
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So I think this weekend I'm going down to Woodbridge to meet Angela & then we're going up to Philly. Sigh. I'm not supposed to be there without Asher. It feels wrong, & I know I shouldn't be going but... I don't know. I think I should focus on constipation as a reason to stop.
I...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
moralitydies:
i definetly understand that. i missed a show on wednesday that i would have loved to see because i had to be up for work early on thursday.
work.
work.
margot:
happy valentines day my dear
Ooh. I like the new background.
I'm sick. I haven't been able to eat in 4 days, & I can't stop throwing up. 7 times today. And I'm here all by myself & I'm lonely & I've been clean for over a week & I don't know if that has anything to do with why I'm sick... but if anyone else knows, you should help...
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I'm sick. I haven't been able to eat in 4 days, & I can't stop throwing up. 7 times today. And I'm here all by myself & I'm lonely & I've been clean for over a week & I don't know if that has anything to do with why I'm sick... but if anyone else knows, you should help...
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VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
erica:
Why didn't I know you when I lived around Baltimore? 
escottie:
stay well, ariel. and stay clean. it's for the best.
I'm going to see my friend in Baltimore & he's going to do my new tattoo. I'm going to get a matching heart on my other hand, it's pretty much exactly like Noelle's, you can see it in her new set, but mine's smaller. But, he's not charging me & that's going to take like 10 minutes... & I'd hate to go ALL the...
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VIEW 14 of 14 COMMENTS
margot:
the new hair is so pretty my dear
chelsea:
Thanks for the set comment/compliment. 
New tats rock, they just ROCK!!
New tats rock, they just ROCK!!Saw The Life Aquatic today. First time in a movie theater together. H&M was closed by the time the movie was over.
Went out for dinner. We're getting clean. Again. Maybe.
My farts smell so bad today. What the fuck.
Uhm. I hate it when your socks leave little dents in your skin.
Went out for dinner. We're getting clean. Again. Maybe.
My farts smell so bad today. What the fuck.
Uhm. I hate it when your socks leave little dents in your skin.
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
flaneur:
I find MIrah a bit hit and miss...and you definitely have to be in a slightly emo mood...but MAN are some of her songs (esp. "Cold Cold Water") incredible. Great lyrics, too.
phineas:
a day with new socks can never be bad
Okay. So. Asher & I got out pictures taken with Santa the other day. I asked him for a pony, but he started trying to get all philisophical on me & telling me to get toys for poor kids & I'm too old for a pony & all that shit, so I was like fuck this shit, Santa.
I got new pink shoes. They are...
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I got new pink shoes. They are...
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VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
candy:
aww. that sucks about your hoodie! thanks for you fabulous comment on my set! have a great new year.. and your santa story above is great..
and your santa story above is great.. 
mo:
thanx darlin' for all the awsome comments on my set... still waiting to see you nekkid!
xx
xx