It's Wednesday night, almost Thursday. Yesterday was supposed to be my girlfriend and my two year anniversary. I ended up begging her to go back out with me or at least consider it, but she turned me down like I knew she would. I really don't know why I bother with her. I know that she's never going to change and that she's never going to want to be with me, but for some odd reason I can't help but feel that I want to be with her. She cheated on me so many times, she lied to me constantly, we fought constantly, and yet, for some odd reason, I can't stop thinking about her and I can't stop wanting to be with her. I tried to move on, I almost got with a couple of girls, but they turned me down as I should've guessed they would. Everyone keeps telling me to just take my time and not rush into a relationship. Do let things work themselves out and to just wait or whatever. I know that this is what I should be doing and everything, but I don't want to. I'm in too much pain right now and I want to get out of it. I either need to get back with Michelle or I need to find someone to take the pain away from me. I'm not talking about just sex either, I just need to be loved and to love someone back right now.
Yesterday I got my MP3 player in the mail. It's wicked great! It can hold up to 30 gigs of music. Right now I have over 1,500 songs on it, and it still has over 24 gigs left on it. I don't know what I'm going to do with all that memory. I've already ripped every Green Day, Metallica, Slayer, Minor Threat, Bleeding Through and other bands' songs in existence to it and have a couple more bands. But I still don't know what I'm going to do with so much memory.
I was hanging out with Frank and his kinda girlfriend Allison tonight. They got into a huge fight at the grocery store we were at, so I just took off. They're always fighting. They also are always breaking up and going back out. They're always mad at each other. Whenever I'm hanging out with Frank he's on the phone with her, and whenever I'm hanging out with both of them they're making out and whatnot. It really kinda sucks. They're so bad for each other it's weird that they're trying to make it work. Michelle and I were so much better and we could've honestly made it work.
I think that I'm going to quit skateboarding. This is only my second summer really skating. For one thing, I'm 20, I'm too old to be getting into this. I suck wicked bad and it's going to take forever to get any better. I'm too embarassed to skate in front of people so I have to do it late at night or when noone else is around. I see all these kids that are like 10 that are so much better than me and it just makes me feel like shit. It's also so popular and commercial right now that it doesn't have any of the original meaning that it once had. It was originally all hardcore and underground and stuff, and now it's probably more popular than football.
That's the problem with so many different things, they're just getting so popular and over commercialized and exploited. For example, punk in general (at least it's mostly pop punk), the Nightmare Before Christmas, Happy Tree Friends, Green Day (even though they've always been exploited and over popular, I still think that they're first two CDs (1,039... and Kerplunk) are their best ones), Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Family Guy, pink, hardcore, Slayer, and so many other things that were once so greate and I loved so much, but now I'm almost ashamed to admit liking them because they're so popular and misrepresented by the general majority of people who are suddenly into them.
Blah... I'm just ranting on randomly now. I'm done.
Yesterday I got my MP3 player in the mail. It's wicked great! It can hold up to 30 gigs of music. Right now I have over 1,500 songs on it, and it still has over 24 gigs left on it. I don't know what I'm going to do with all that memory. I've already ripped every Green Day, Metallica, Slayer, Minor Threat, Bleeding Through and other bands' songs in existence to it and have a couple more bands. But I still don't know what I'm going to do with so much memory.
I was hanging out with Frank and his kinda girlfriend Allison tonight. They got into a huge fight at the grocery store we were at, so I just took off. They're always fighting. They also are always breaking up and going back out. They're always mad at each other. Whenever I'm hanging out with Frank he's on the phone with her, and whenever I'm hanging out with both of them they're making out and whatnot. It really kinda sucks. They're so bad for each other it's weird that they're trying to make it work. Michelle and I were so much better and we could've honestly made it work.
I think that I'm going to quit skateboarding. This is only my second summer really skating. For one thing, I'm 20, I'm too old to be getting into this. I suck wicked bad and it's going to take forever to get any better. I'm too embarassed to skate in front of people so I have to do it late at night or when noone else is around. I see all these kids that are like 10 that are so much better than me and it just makes me feel like shit. It's also so popular and commercial right now that it doesn't have any of the original meaning that it once had. It was originally all hardcore and underground and stuff, and now it's probably more popular than football.
That's the problem with so many different things, they're just getting so popular and over commercialized and exploited. For example, punk in general (at least it's mostly pop punk), the Nightmare Before Christmas, Happy Tree Friends, Green Day (even though they've always been exploited and over popular, I still think that they're first two CDs (1,039... and Kerplunk) are their best ones), Aqua Teen Hunger Force, Family Guy, pink, hardcore, Slayer, and so many other things that were once so greate and I loved so much, but now I'm almost ashamed to admit liking them because they're so popular and misrepresented by the general majority of people who are suddenly into them.
Blah... I'm just ranting on randomly now. I'm done.