arbitraria

seems like it's blog-happy day for everyone, so why not add to the madness. just a wee bit of time for reflection...

today is my one-month anniversary with my darling Rickrolled. seems like such a short period of time, yet forever all at once. i've never wanted to rely on someone else to make me happy, but i do believe that having someone incredible in your life can only add a new dimension of joy that can't be found in anything or anyone else. i've never felt so comfortable and at ease with someone so quickly...there have only been a few days we've even spent apart this entire month. speaks volumes. i can get lost in his beautiful eyes for what seems like an eternity...i've never had someone treat me so sweetly. he is precious to me. i feel so lucky for what i tripped upon and fell into...a deep and heartfelt connection i didn't think was possible. thank you baby for restoring my faith in love...i can't wait for what the future brings.

aside from my spewing saccharine...so much has changed in the past month. thanks to an increase in happiness, plus some new meds, i'm sleeping more normally and waking up at a time that lends itself to the possibility of working a "real" job again. the resumes went out last week, i've got two possible leads right now, one of which would be ideal as i used to work there during the summer and winter breaks from school. while i'm disenchanted with the architectural profession in general, i'm a bit more relaxed about it right now and not dreading it, which is progress for me. so keep your fingers crossed, hopefully soon i can rejoin the world of day-dwellers and be a contributing member of the workforce yet again.

which will allow me to save up money to get out of the hole i've been living in for the past two years...i adore my parents, they are wonderful to me and have been incredibly supportive during my "recovery". it's time to move on and get life in motion again though, i'm aiming to be out of the house about two months after i start working again. fast though it may be, the man and i are looking to cohabitate in bliss, and it can't come soon enough...

it's memorial day weekend. for the first time in ten years, i don't have to drag my sorry ass to colorguard rehearsal under a nasty dirty overpass in harrison, nj. i'm half-tempted to go for a visit tonight, but we'll see. i know i talk about it to my new friends all the time, but it's been such a part of my life for so long, it's strange adjusting to normalcy without drum corps. i will be going to the annual bbq on sunday though, to see a lot of people i marched with over the years and have a great time with those who became my second family for so long. learn to love it from the outside...i'm doing well so far though, i'm proud of myself for that. the urges to go back have been few and far between. and as long as the weekend holds no car accidents or shitty breakups, it will be a success. (bad history on memorial day weekend, if you couldn't tell...)

so...this is getting long and rambling, i'm pretty good at that, though the writing helps to get my silly brain working productively. think i'll go make some phone calls to prospective employers...i'm so phone-shy it wrenches my stomach but i have suck it up. wish zoomusikgrl and i luck on our shoot tomorrow...jersey rocks, i can't wait to work with her.

have a fantastic holiday, everyone...much love and llamas to you all.