Cure: Japanese Whispers
wearing: black jeans, black hello kitty t-shirt over fishnet shirt, black sparkly jean jacket
dynamic dichotomy of inspiration and despair. The future sometimes looks so bleak: just year after year of the same old thing. I can definitely think of some things i could use right now: a good multi-vitamin; a really rejuvenating ritual; a reorienting psychedelic trip; true relaxation, not just...
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wearing: black jeans, black hello kitty t-shirt over fishnet shirt, black sparkly jean jacket
dynamic dichotomy of inspiration and despair. The future sometimes looks so bleak: just year after year of the same old thing. I can definitely think of some things i could use right now: a good multi-vitamin; a really rejuvenating ritual; a reorienting psychedelic trip; true relaxation, not just...
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Update: a little later:
imagination + lassisitude = escapism
imagination + motivation = creativity
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Stabbing Westward: Wither, Blister, Burn and Peel
Stting at desk with wet hair
I have run out of energy for this semester. I can't wait unil it is over. Then i will be able to:
sit outside and read a book for as long as i want
make a mobile...
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imagination + lassisitude = escapism
imagination + motivation = creativity
---------------------------------------------------------
Stabbing Westward: Wither, Blister, Burn and Peel
Stting at desk with wet hair
I have run out of energy for this semester. I can't wait unil it is over. Then i will be able to:
sit outside and read a book for as long as i want
make a mobile...
Read More
trilobyte:
Massive Attack: The 100th Window
Sitting at desk
2 damned hours of sleep again... not so bright, trilobyte...
Your list should include taking naps. Or just stretching out and relaxing, taking it in, not having to go anywhere or do anything.
Fill out the forms anyways, late though it may be. If it comes back light and then you then have to either take time off or have a reduced course load, so be it. If you just blow it off now, you may be living with regret next fall and that wouldn't be so good. At least in my opinion.
Good luck making it through the next week. I know that on paper it's just seven more days, but as these things go it tends to be the pinnacle of stress with each day being longer than the previous.
Now I need to grab a shower and get to work... then come home and die again... On one hand I feel dumb for intentionally doing things that I know will hurt. It's masochistic and self destructive? No, I think I just weighed it and figured that it was worth the agony. Sure, that's easy to determine when you're not in the actual agony lol...
zzzzzzzzzz
Sitting at desk
2 damned hours of sleep again... not so bright, trilobyte...
Your list should include taking naps. Or just stretching out and relaxing, taking it in, not having to go anywhere or do anything.
Fill out the forms anyways, late though it may be. If it comes back light and then you then have to either take time off or have a reduced course load, so be it. If you just blow it off now, you may be living with regret next fall and that wouldn't be so good. At least in my opinion.
Good luck making it through the next week. I know that on paper it's just seven more days, but as these things go it tends to be the pinnacle of stress with each day being longer than the previous.
Now I need to grab a shower and get to work... then come home and die again... On one hand I feel dumb for intentionally doing things that I know will hurt. It's masochistic and self destructive? No, I think I just weighed it and figured that it was worth the agony. Sure, that's easy to determine when you're not in the actual agony lol...
zzzzzzzzzz 
_sarah_:
Yup... hung out with the hockey player last night and started making out 1.5 hours later. We spent four hours fooling around, and then he had to catch a nap before work. I felt kind of bad for keeping him up so late, but I think he enjoyed himself.
Good luck with your papers. It'll all be over soon.
Good luck with your papers. It'll all be over soon.
after this thursday, the only thing i have to do is study for finals and find a job. I keep telling myself "i will find a job, i will find a job." They will not all be gone by the time i get there. I tell myself this because it's too stressful to think otherwise, and extra stress will get me nowhere at this point....
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Crying. eyes hurt from so much crying. head hurts. Feet hurt because there is shattered glass all over my floor. embedded in the soles of my feet, too small to see. left hand has tiny wounds from where i smashed my hand into the already-smashed mirror.
When you lay on the ground outside nothing is bad. The living earth is around you. It is so...
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When you lay on the ground outside nothing is bad. The living earth is around you. It is so...
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VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
trilobyte:
What happened!? You ok? Details, woman, details!
I've got my own story of shattered glass, lying on the ground outside, and feeling the earth alive around you... remind me to tell you about it sometime.
Everyone has moments of weakness, don't judge yourself too harshly. The people around you have that faith for a reason. So do people on the opposite side of the country. I hope things are okay. Take some deep breaths. Hope to run into you soon...
an erazor of love
I've got my own story of shattered glass, lying on the ground outside, and feeling the earth alive around you... remind me to tell you about it sometime.
Everyone has moments of weakness, don't judge yourself too harshly. The people around you have that faith for a reason. So do people on the opposite side of the country. I hope things are okay. Take some deep breaths. Hope to run into you soon...
an erazor of love
trilobyte:
Saw your away message today, and that sounds pretty screwed up. Sorry to hear you had a rough weekend, hopefully things pickup for you soon...
trilo
trilo Tell me something nice, or something comforting?
bombader:
Picture yourself, exactly where you are-observe your surroundings, observe your breath and every twitch, scratch or bit of pressure that you feel---now go out from where you are sitting and imagine that you are observing from overhead the block or immediate area that you are in; now imagine that you see the town that you are in, then the state, then the country, through the oceans, and pulling away from the earth to watch it from space as you float through the stars, without weight, without want, supported by a bubble of warm, soft fluid
So i woke up to yelling. The yelling went on for long enough to wake me out of a very deep sleep, and i realized that it was not just the normal random dorm yelling--no, this was sustained and obviously very upset. I went across the hall and opened the door to the suite, where there was a guy standing there screaming. I asked him...
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VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
rickroyal:
Strange situation. I seem to remember dealers at my former college being a little more on the ball. Or maybe they just had more class.
I got two citations from the fire marshal who said my dorm room was a fire hazard. That was annoying.
I got two citations from the fire marshal who said my dorm room was a fire hazard. That was annoying.
fractal:
I woke up to my neighbors being loud in the back
Today was our last real japanese class. everyone was really silly.
I am still happy. I have been happy for over a week now. It's cool.
Oddly, every other thing i think of to write is something that annoyed me . Strange how one bad thing among many happy things seems to stand out as being worth mentioning.
It is a beautiful day. It is...
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I am still happy. I have been happy for over a week now. It's cool.
Oddly, every other thing i think of to write is something that annoyed me . Strange how one bad thing among many happy things seems to stand out as being worth mentioning.
It is a beautiful day. It is...
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lighthammer:
So can you speak Japanese now? Cause that would be awesome if you could
What's that saying? "When your smiling..when your smiling..the whole world smiles with you." I think it was a song. In any case, glad to hear that your happy.
Thanks for the kind words. Enjoy your nap
What's that saying? "When your smiling..when your smiling..the whole world smiles with you." I think it was a song. In any case, glad to hear that your happy.
Thanks for the kind words. Enjoy your nap
fractal:
I can't wait until my classes are over...blah...I'm sick of school...
Waaaahhhhh!!!! No one ever comments on my journal!
*takes ball and goes home*
*sulks*
VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
trilobyte:
alas, i felt all self-conscious and changed out the profile pic.... *hides*
trilo
trilo
lighthammer:
That's a shame, because it's a fine journal.
This morning i was thinking that i would just concentrate on getting my degree, and not worry about just what i would do later, because there are SO many things i am interested in that i can't imagine settling on one.
Then this afternoon i read an essay for Greek art that totally knocked my socks off and made me REALLY want to write stuff...
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Then this afternoon i read an essay for Greek art that totally knocked my socks off and made me REALLY want to write stuff...
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trilobyte:
you should run a museum or two... maybe create a chain of museums for the masses?
you've never been out to LA, have you? If not, the Getty museum is not to be missed. Someday I'd like to go to Greece, and for that matter most of Europe. I so want to defile the parthenon, though. But in a non-permanent way... I want to go explore that spot off the coast of Greece where they believe Atlantis once was...
trilo
you've never been out to LA, have you? If not, the Getty museum is not to be missed. Someday I'd like to go to Greece, and for that matter most of Europe. I so want to defile the parthenon, though. But in a non-permanent way... I want to go explore that spot off the coast of Greece where they believe Atlantis once was...
trilo Really happy, in a non-manic sort of way. Its amazing what several hours of great sex can do for my mental health. I am going to have to look into getting a prescription for it. . .
Today i took an exam and turned in a research paper. It feels like friday afternoon now that i have that stuff off my back
Trying to decide...
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Today i took an exam and turned in a research paper. It feels like friday afternoon now that i have that stuff off my back
Trying to decide...
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melissa2:
"non manic sort or way"
i know exactly......
i know exactly......
trilobyte:
congrats on many fronts, including the getting of stuff off your back.
club night? *perks up*
*collapses* no energy. but have fun. go. really. then tell us all about it.
trilo
club night? *perks up*
*collapses* no energy. but have fun. go. really. then tell us all about it.
trilo
you mean the natural state of your face isn't a big smile now? you do need the rejuvenation program... get yourself to the right state of mind, then enjoy the intensity and pleasure of the fantastic orgasm. when done properly and in the right frame of mind, nothing in life is better. sorry to hear you're feeling the emptiness. you need to do something about that, trust me it's not a good thing to run on empty for a long period of time.......