here i am again. online and alone. aloss and adrift.... quite the dramatic huh?
whatever....
i think i have somehow been able to put off the crash i thought i was going to have.....i know i will be down and depressed again in the futer...cant fight that fact... but for now im kind of hovering above the pit i have been in so many times before...not carring much...ive been pushing my body like crazy the past week..... working out at least 3 hours a day, sometimes 5....definately a change in my body. maybe its helping me not think too....im too tired to think perhaps...i feel the saddness and hurt still lurking inside.....but enough of this talk....it will only bring me down sooner and i dont want to be there......
made some friends through gothicpersonals.com talking with them through AIM........ its good to talk to people i think.....better than being holed up all alone with no contact....
i guess i will go now.....no one reads this anyway.....ah life......pain in the ass
whatever....
i think i have somehow been able to put off the crash i thought i was going to have.....i know i will be down and depressed again in the futer...cant fight that fact... but for now im kind of hovering above the pit i have been in so many times before...not carring much...ive been pushing my body like crazy the past week..... working out at least 3 hours a day, sometimes 5....definately a change in my body. maybe its helping me not think too....im too tired to think perhaps...i feel the saddness and hurt still lurking inside.....but enough of this talk....it will only bring me down sooner and i dont want to be there......
made some friends through gothicpersonals.com talking with them through AIM........ its good to talk to people i think.....better than being holed up all alone with no contact....
i guess i will go now.....no one reads this anyway.....ah life......pain in the ass