"i'm losing ground
you know how this world can beat you down
and i'm made of clay
i fear i'm the only one who thinks this way
i'm always falling down the same hill
bamboo puncturing this skin
and nothing comes bleeding out of me just like a waterfall i'm drowning in
2 feet below the surface i can still make out your wavy face
and if i could just reach you maybe i could leave this place
i do not want this
i do not want this
i do not want this
i do not want this
and don't you tell me how i feel
don't you tell me how i feel
don't you tell me how i feel
you don't know just how i feel
i stay inside my bed
i have lived so many lives all in my head
and don't tell me that you care
there really isn't anything now, is there?
you would know, wouldn't you?
you extend your hand to those who suffer
to those who know what it really feels like
to those who've had a taste
like that means something
and oh so sick i am
and maybe i don't have a choice
and maybe that is all i have
and maybe this is a cry for help
i do not want this
i do not want this
i do not want this
i do not want this
and don't you tell me how i feel
don't you tell me how i feel
don't you tell me how i feel
you don't know just how i feel
i want to know everything
i want to be everywhere
i want to fuck everyone in the world
i want to do something that matters
i want to know everything
i want to be everywhere
i want to fuck everyone in the world
i want to do something that matters
i want to know everything
i want to be everywhere
i want to fuck everyone in the world
i want to do something that matters
i want to know everything
i want to be everywhere
i want to fuck everyone in the world
i want to do something that matters
i want to know everything
i want to be everywhere
i want to fuck everyone in the world
i want to do something that matters"
yea....so i started todays journal with a nin song...im sure its cliche but hey.... it felt right.... god i just dont know anything. what to do....what to feel....what i want.....who i am....
im spiralling back into another depression.....i think i was floating above it for the past couple of weeks...hovering somewhere around mild apathy and amusement... now it feels like a dark cloud is on the horizon...maybe i just need to get laid. ah life....so far it has sucked alot.....
you know how this world can beat you down
and i'm made of clay
i fear i'm the only one who thinks this way
i'm always falling down the same hill
bamboo puncturing this skin
and nothing comes bleeding out of me just like a waterfall i'm drowning in
2 feet below the surface i can still make out your wavy face
and if i could just reach you maybe i could leave this place
i do not want this
i do not want this
i do not want this
i do not want this
and don't you tell me how i feel
don't you tell me how i feel
don't you tell me how i feel
you don't know just how i feel
i stay inside my bed
i have lived so many lives all in my head
and don't tell me that you care
there really isn't anything now, is there?
you would know, wouldn't you?
you extend your hand to those who suffer
to those who know what it really feels like
to those who've had a taste
like that means something
and oh so sick i am
and maybe i don't have a choice
and maybe that is all i have
and maybe this is a cry for help
i do not want this
i do not want this
i do not want this
i do not want this
and don't you tell me how i feel
don't you tell me how i feel
don't you tell me how i feel
you don't know just how i feel
i want to know everything
i want to be everywhere
i want to fuck everyone in the world
i want to do something that matters
i want to know everything
i want to be everywhere
i want to fuck everyone in the world
i want to do something that matters
i want to know everything
i want to be everywhere
i want to fuck everyone in the world
i want to do something that matters
i want to know everything
i want to be everywhere
i want to fuck everyone in the world
i want to do something that matters
i want to know everything
i want to be everywhere
i want to fuck everyone in the world
i want to do something that matters"
yea....so i started todays journal with a nin song...im sure its cliche but hey.... it felt right.... god i just dont know anything. what to do....what to feel....what i want.....who i am....
im spiralling back into another depression.....i think i was floating above it for the past couple of weeks...hovering somewhere around mild apathy and amusement... now it feels like a dark cloud is on the horizon...maybe i just need to get laid. ah life....so far it has sucked alot.....