aponia

Its been an emotionally draining weekend. I let loose of alot of feelings I've had stored up over the past two weeks.

Its weird to be told your mom is going to be dead last week, and have everything back to normal this week. It left me all emotionally fucked up inside. I don't think I'm ok. I think I'm a wreck who doesn't know whats coming or going anymore.

Like I'm really fragile, I want to freak out and cry all the damn time. And its really hard to keep a lid on it. I don't want to freak out my loved ones, but man, I'm just on the verge of tears every hour, every minute. Its been hard and difficult and sometimes I'm really close to just giving up.

I need to sleep, a really long, deep sleep. I need a vacation, and not because of work stress, but mostly for the well-being of my mental health. I'm really close to a complete breakdown, I can feel it. I need a week without stress, without all this constant pressure.

Ugh.