It's been so amazing to come back here after SO MANY YEARS to the open arms and embrace of all of you amazing humans! I don't know how I could've ever possibly let myself forget how amazing this community truly is. I really do feel lucky to be part of something so wonderful and have so many people still here for me after all these years of being absent!
I touched base on this subject just a bit in my last post, but I'm going to tell you a little more about it since this is what's going on in my life right now.. For the past five months, I've been going through a pretty intense treatment called Zoladex for my extremely severe endometriosis. Zoladex is a form of chemotherapy that eliminates all of the hormones from your body, causing me to go into a chemically induced menopause, by the way of a small pea-sized implant that is injected into my belly monthly. Just in case you don't know what endometriosis is, it is an incurable disease caused by endometrial tissue that usually grows inside the uterus, growing outside of the uterus. In my case- it is covering everything in my entire pelvic and abdominal cavity, including my bladder, ureters, kidneys, bowels, intestines, within my uterine wall, ovaries, fallopian tubes, pelvic floor, and abdominal wall. This tissue is SUPER destructive and causes adhesions, cysts, and scar tissues and makes all of my organs get stuck together and twisted up into a big sticky mess. The ONLY thing that helps this is surgery. I've had so many operations at this point in my life, I've lost track, but I do know that I'm getting close to 20 now. I've already lost my right ovary and both fallopian tubes due to so much damage from this disease, and during my next operation (which will be on August 27th) I'll be having a total hysterectomy and losing every last bit of my reproductive system -before the age of 30- and before I ever had the chance to decide if I'd maybe someday like to have a child of my own. I'm sure you can imagine how this may be pretty difficult on me, but it's something I've had to accept and come to terms with. I'm trying to prepare myself the best I possibly can for the grieving process which I'm sure will follow this operation.. But there's only so much I can do until the time actually comes. I think maybe subconsciously this could have something to do with why I've come back here and have been longing for the days of all of my SG pals. I miss the days of having the support from so many incredible, genuine, loving people on this site.
I'm MORE than ready to just get past this part of my life and move on to better things! I've been officially diagnosed since I was 16, but I have really been dealing with this pretty hardcore for the past 3 years now. I definitely never expected this to be going on for this long. I moved back home to Michigan from Austin, TX three summers ago now to take care of this and thought it would only take one summer and that I would be back to Texas after that.. But, here I am, still in Michigan, going through my third round of treatment and preparing for my third major operation, THREE YEARS LATER! I'm just trying my very best to stay hopeful that this is the one that does the trick and I can get back to all my best friends in Texas as soon as possible after all of this!
SO, in the meantime! I could use all the encouragement, all the good conversation, all the funny jokes, and all the cute pictures of your animals! I'll leave you guys with some photos of my good girls, Edie & Xia <3
XO
Apollo
