The beginning of the following year turned was quite complicated and painful for me. The stories are deeply personal ... but the result of all them turned out to be both prosaic (for someone) and bitter (for me), as I violated loyalty to my beliefs and ideals in the name of self-preservation. I know SG is a country of positive, joy, love and peace, and it's not a good deal to share something "too dark" here even just a little. But without its other side, all this love will turn into atavism, don't you think?.. Through hardship to the stars. The path to yourself, unchanging and familiar to many.
Several years ago, strangers who assured me of my excessive vanity, high conceit or even a “crown on the head”, hurt me. I knew who I was for sure. Later, I began to really understand the fact that secrecy, self-doubt or self-defense (in a significant dispute or confrontation with Internet trolls, reasoned or the kindest and only slightly ironic) - all this can sometimes be confused with arrogance and the like. Introverts are quite familiar with situations when their friendliness (or verbosity due to awkwardness \ desire to create comfort for the interlocutor no matter what) can be regarded as "Hey, you are not an introvert at all, don’t be mean!", right? .. The same - or virtually the same - is here as well. I was really afraid sometimes to protect myself from other people's bad vibrations and user relationships. I could endure a lot, I really believed (and still do) in mutual support and mutual assistance. Some of my beliefs in our days are increasingly turning into destructive co-dependent relationships. Some others refer to the lyrical, "fairy-tale" ideals - which, in turn, can really save lives and destinies, and as a result we will hear the story of a dissolute person whose spouse \ friend \ relative \ someone else believed in him (her) and helped to overcome the dark times, and gradually, step by step, the difficult stage of life was passed and happy ending came. Such stories are not too much - but this is their greatest value. Yes, I am still an idealist :) But I think many of us would like to have such a reliable person in our life. And that's one of the main reasons I've always wanted to be such person for those several precious people I've ever had in my life. And, maybe, this also affects my unability to be really angry, jealous or hating.
Spring... I practically missed it and almost did not feel its presence because of mental and physical recovering. But while trying to distract myself by something that gave me joy in my adolescence, I remembered the magic games of Westwood Studios. I adored Kyrandia and Lands of Lore! In my childhood, we had disks with DOS games and all that... I still love old games more than the new ones for many reasons. But then... I went through a lot of games, finding different secrets, and somehow I finished many of them before my dad did it. Later I prompted him what and where better to do. I realized that it was often annoying, but as a child I just wanted to help 😄 Along with such "nostalgia gaming therapy", I participated in some shootings - not as much as I did before, but I was really surprised when some of the shots appeared on VOGUE. I think it's a common thing for some photographers to be published there, but that was my first experience with it, so it meant a lot. Actually, any publication at anywhere means a lot for me, both in social websites groups or on special photo resources - any ones except various weird and suspicious pages 😄 Also, my father turned 51 and I finally had an opportunity to take some portraits of him as a present. And then...
Summer. It's still summer for me, though it's September already. I finally went on a sea vacation, I visited the zoo for the second time in my life (except the tiny "tactile zoo" exhibition I was visiting once) and patted lots of animals there (that was forbidden, of course) and made some photos for that zoo... Also, there was a great loving story about animals, I will share it with you after this blog post... And I've finally got two sets for SG! Soon I will download them. It's been a long time since my latest Hopeful set here, so I guess I need to break the pause 😊
Autumn. What will She brings?.. We'll see.
Share your feelings on any of the following year's stage. May it sound like a violin music - passionate, sad, moody and beautiful. I'll be grateful.
Love,
Aon
