Fuck that last blog, I'm frustrated. To much has been going on and not enough have I been paying attention too.
I want so bad to want nothing but it doesn't help, my mood is everything. I can't fix attitude I can only calm myself into apathy, which I do love so dearly.
fuck this shit. I Hate not being able.. incomplete frustration grrr.
I want, I want, give me, give me ahhh fuck me. It doesn't matter.
Life isn't about me its about everybody else. Sometimes I just want to sit and stare at the sky until I fade away and die. I'm not depressed with life I'm more or less just bored with myself.
Free people can do whatever they want and know they will succeed. Well fuck doesn't that take the fun out of it? Shouldn't I go on to do something different? I really get tired of thinking I have the answers. Maybe one of you can help me. I'd appreciate it.
I used to abuse drugs because I could predict what would happen if I didn't...so vain, I know. I'm not really special. I'm just like you, we all want to be important, we all want to be needed...but I want something DIFFERENT!!! I want, I want, I want to be REALLY, REALLY SPECIAL! GOD DAMNIT I DESERVE IT!!! hahaha what have I done to deserve it?
Just give me it! anything? PLEASE!
God its so sad to be begging for my life but I feel like I'm swallowing a gun
I just want something different and nothing seems to stop the thirst except apathy.
Is that really the way to go about solving problems? Saying "Nope, I don't give a fuck about em"
Happy, happy, happy, boring, boring, boring GO FUCK MYSELF!!!
"You don't understand me!?" I'm a fourteen year old girl bleeding into tampons.
Geeze, how classy to regress to female pubescent PMS.
Its funny, things turn out differently when we imagine ourselves as an actual someone else.
Cmon what am I working with...maybe I'm hanging out at all the wrong places. But I never get along with those who are indoctrinated. FREEBIRD!!!
If you feel the same let me know I'm not alone. I always feel alone but I try not to let it bother me, I just imagine myself as someone else that gets along with everyone and I talk about our few common interests. If your a guy its sex, picking up broads, poker, music...and basic philosophy (which is almost like never) If your a girl its picking you up, building rapport, investigating who you are (which is often boring), becoming friends, getting your number and having sex if I feel we would go somewhere, as in a relationship (a prudish boy! hah how many of those are there?)
Don't get me wrong I'm not begging for attention, I'm begging for a friend I don't have to bullshit about stupid shit with. I'm tired of every relationship I have with someone else being one sided. Dude of course you want to hang out with me, I'm genuinely interested in you. All people should be happy and one day I will be surrounded by people who make me happy...I want it to be uh to-to-today junior!
<3s & s
P.S. I love philosophy, zen, people and sociology. Make a new friend <--this is a uvula haha
I love the chicken it cracks me up bok bok bok bok bok lol
P.S.S. Northstar is the shizzy
I want so bad to want nothing but it doesn't help, my mood is everything. I can't fix attitude I can only calm myself into apathy, which I do love so dearly.
fuck this shit. I Hate not being able.. incomplete frustration grrr.
I want, I want, give me, give me ahhh fuck me. It doesn't matter.
Life isn't about me its about everybody else. Sometimes I just want to sit and stare at the sky until I fade away and die. I'm not depressed with life I'm more or less just bored with myself.
Free people can do whatever they want and know they will succeed. Well fuck doesn't that take the fun out of it? Shouldn't I go on to do something different? I really get tired of thinking I have the answers. Maybe one of you can help me. I'd appreciate it.
I used to abuse drugs because I could predict what would happen if I didn't...so vain, I know. I'm not really special. I'm just like you, we all want to be important, we all want to be needed...but I want something DIFFERENT!!! I want, I want, I want to be REALLY, REALLY SPECIAL! GOD DAMNIT I DESERVE IT!!! hahaha what have I done to deserve it?
Just give me it! anything? PLEASE!
God its so sad to be begging for my life but I feel like I'm swallowing a gun
I just want something different and nothing seems to stop the thirst except apathy.
Is that really the way to go about solving problems? Saying "Nope, I don't give a fuck about em"
Happy, happy, happy, boring, boring, boring GO FUCK MYSELF!!!
"You don't understand me!?" I'm a fourteen year old girl bleeding into tampons.
Geeze, how classy to regress to female pubescent PMS.
Its funny, things turn out differently when we imagine ourselves as an actual someone else.
Cmon what am I working with...maybe I'm hanging out at all the wrong places. But I never get along with those who are indoctrinated. FREEBIRD!!!
If you feel the same let me know I'm not alone. I always feel alone but I try not to let it bother me, I just imagine myself as someone else that gets along with everyone and I talk about our few common interests. If your a guy its sex, picking up broads, poker, music...and basic philosophy (which is almost like never) If your a girl its picking you up, building rapport, investigating who you are (which is often boring), becoming friends, getting your number and having sex if I feel we would go somewhere, as in a relationship (a prudish boy! hah how many of those are there?)
Don't get me wrong I'm not begging for attention, I'm begging for a friend I don't have to bullshit about stupid shit with. I'm tired of every relationship I have with someone else being one sided. Dude of course you want to hang out with me, I'm genuinely interested in you. All people should be happy and one day I will be surrounded by people who make me happy...I want it to be uh to-to-today junior!
<3s & s
P.S. I love philosophy, zen, people and sociology. Make a new friend <--this is a uvula haha
I love the chicken it cracks me up bok bok bok bok bok lol
P.S.S. Northstar is the shizzy
givememedicine:
haha I <3 you.