antimony

so i'm working again. mm, back to pain. i love my body, why won't it love me?

this old woman came in today who has te same thing as me except she was crazy and wearing a surgical mask and started telling me about how i need the proper footwear. no shit lady, why do you think i can't wear heels? an hour in the things and my ankles wanna die. just because you've had this disease twenty years longer than me doesn't mean i'm retarded.

anyway. so i'm tired all the time and it's fucking great. i have no ambition in life. i want to stay home all day and sleep and sew a little and knit a little and clean when i become disgusted with the filth and play with animals. i don't want to stand up, ever again.

but i will.

because the rent must be paid.

one day my legs will give out and my back will give out and i don't know WHAT i'll do. because disability isn't enough to live on,

i am a burden.

but hey, i'll put on a happy faaaaace!