Well, I've obviously gone completely insane! I've gotten my therapist so worried that she wants me to call her tomorrow to check in. Yesterday, the day I saw her, I had started drinking vodka heavily at 3:00am, took a nap from 6:00am to 10:00am, and went right back to drinking and continued all day and drank until 3:00 this morning. I was vomiting most of today, pure stomach acid. I had forgotten to eat since noon yesterday! Oops!!
My neuroscience professor is so worried that she says I can skip this exam if I'm too stressed out. My psychotherapist called my family doctor, my meds prescriber, and told her how much I had been drinking on my anxiety meds (prozac and buisprone) and now they want me to see a psychiatrist too. Dammit!!
As far as I can tell, I just hate reality so much that I'll do pretty much any drug to avoid it... It's gotten super bad again lately!! And my suicidal thoughts have gotten pretty frequent... Don't worry, I would never do that!! It would just hurt the people that love me.
I hope I get better soon!! I'm headed towards ruining my life!! I've worked so hard to get to the place I am today, I can't give up now!!! But I also can't get myself to care enough to stop this behavior... At least my professors are being super patient with me!!
I'm trying out at a strip club tomorrow. I've hardly been showing up for my jobs lately, I figure maybe I'd show up if I was getting paid to be myself.... So stripper.... I'm pretty nervous about it, I've chickened out twice now. My self esteem is just awful!! I even got all ready one of the days and just didn't want to go. Though, I did have a bunch of really dark bruises all over my legs from a drunken punching contest me and my friend got into. And today I didn't go because of all the vomiting. But tomorrow when I get off of my web building job, I'll try again. It's a pretty classy place, they want all tattoos larger than a dollar bill folded in half to be covered. I hope they're at least ok with unatural hair colors!! I hope I get the job!! There are a couple other place I'm going to apply if they don't hire me.
I only have one out fit that would be appropriate, I wonder if they'd let me get an advance on my pay to go shopping with, or at least lend me some stuff. I've never actually been to a strip club, could be why I'm nervous. I've taken aerial burlesque classes and I do acrobatics, plus the nude modeling... so I figure I should be pretty good at it.
A few of my friends have commented that with my addictive personality, it would be an unhealthy environment to be in. But I think that my rebellious side would kick in and I'd rebel against the drug environment... I can't stand going with the group!!!! I guess we'll find out...
My neuroscience professor is so worried that she says I can skip this exam if I'm too stressed out. My psychotherapist called my family doctor, my meds prescriber, and told her how much I had been drinking on my anxiety meds (prozac and buisprone) and now they want me to see a psychiatrist too. Dammit!!
As far as I can tell, I just hate reality so much that I'll do pretty much any drug to avoid it... It's gotten super bad again lately!! And my suicidal thoughts have gotten pretty frequent... Don't worry, I would never do that!! It would just hurt the people that love me.
I hope I get better soon!! I'm headed towards ruining my life!! I've worked so hard to get to the place I am today, I can't give up now!!! But I also can't get myself to care enough to stop this behavior... At least my professors are being super patient with me!!
I'm trying out at a strip club tomorrow. I've hardly been showing up for my jobs lately, I figure maybe I'd show up if I was getting paid to be myself.... So stripper.... I'm pretty nervous about it, I've chickened out twice now. My self esteem is just awful!! I even got all ready one of the days and just didn't want to go. Though, I did have a bunch of really dark bruises all over my legs from a drunken punching contest me and my friend got into. And today I didn't go because of all the vomiting. But tomorrow when I get off of my web building job, I'll try again. It's a pretty classy place, they want all tattoos larger than a dollar bill folded in half to be covered. I hope they're at least ok with unatural hair colors!! I hope I get the job!! There are a couple other place I'm going to apply if they don't hire me.
I only have one out fit that would be appropriate, I wonder if they'd let me get an advance on my pay to go shopping with, or at least lend me some stuff. I've never actually been to a strip club, could be why I'm nervous. I've taken aerial burlesque classes and I do acrobatics, plus the nude modeling... so I figure I should be pretty good at it.
A few of my friends have commented that with my addictive personality, it would be an unhealthy environment to be in. But I think that my rebellious side would kick in and I'd rebel against the drug environment... I can't stand going with the group!!!! I guess we'll find out...
sharkfan69:
break a leg? lol its already bruised i know.. ur hot..i hope u get the job... goodluck!
crazedone:
shit, that's an explosive situation little sister. I ain't your daddy and I definitely don't know you but I've seen that line before, careful on this one.