To begin this blog Id have to go back to where I left off, November 2013. During this time I was in the beginning stages of my health issues. Having really no idea that I was going to face a year battling Cervical Cancer. But let's flash forward to August 12th 2014 real quick.. That was the day I got the clear from my Doctor that I no longer had an abnormal pep and/or HPV was no longer presenting itself. Yes, Praise Jesus! I am officially in "remission" if you'd like to be technical about it. The feeling that came over me that day was the best feeling in my life.
Now back to that year of treatments. It had it's ups and downs.. Its good days and bad days.. It wasn't dying that scared the shit out of me. It was not living long enough to accomplish most things and live. My mundane life began playing with my emotions. Finding love, getting married, having babies or traveling more and experiencing great adventures was all I ever wanted in this life.. And I wasn't sure any of that was going to happen.. Dying at a young age is such a terrible thing to hear nowadays.. No parent should have to bury their child.
On my sick days I could barely remove myself from the bed. The medication/shots made me feel so fucking shitty. On the days where I felt great. I would wake up with tons of energy; Make myself some breakfast. Have some coffee. Do my morning yoga, cardio and lift weights.. Have lunch and head to work. Come home, have an afternoon snack consisting of edibles because THC does the body good. Do some afternoon yoga before dinner and in bed around 9 or 10 pm every night. That route was a life choice and lifestyle that really did make somewhat of a difference for me.. I dropped weight and gained it back because of the medications.
Honestly I was doing something right because that last doctor visit on August 12th 2014, Cervical Cancer was no longer going to be a fight for me.. I made so many friends and lost most of them due to this disease. I joined two support groups and went through countless therapy sessions.. I don't feel like a survivor..I feel like a fucking warrior.. But for every good thing comes a bad thing...
Depression was beginning to take over my life.. I fell off my workout and lifestyle routine shortly after my health scare. I stared to gain more weight. Eventually enough weight where I started to have severe high blood pressure. I started experiencing constant migraines, nose bleeds and dizziness every other day.. Here I was 25 years old and fucking terrified of having a heart attack.. Being at my heaviest weight I felt miserable and was consistently giving up and not seeing the bright side of anything..