animalmutha

today i heard a new toast that will be forever burned into my memory......

holding up a shotglass full of jamesons whiskey my friend said and i quote

"if my dog could piss this stuff
and i thought he could piss enough
i would tie his tail to my bed
and suck his dick till we were both found dead"


who the fuck says there...
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the seats on bikes were designed by homosexual nazis.......i ride 7 miles to go to work.....i feels like prison sex.
im gonna start swerving out into traffic just to kill the pain.....o lord please heal mah taint!

if i ever drink and drive again,if im ever that fucking stupid, i hope i die!

dont drink and drive you will spill your drink. but its funny when you hand the cop your insurance and it smells like beer.

hell-o