angryadam

I have an uber crush on a girl and I am a terrible person for it.

The end

This free time will be the end of me.

Oh dear

Happy to learn an old friend is moving up here.
Not happy to revive the old arguments the gf and I had about her.

I feel sick.

So more on that...

It's a new month. My degree program is wrapping up. I have an internship coming up in just a few weeks, and I don't have a property locked down yet. My brother just shipped off for another deployment. I'm feeling kind of stressed and anxious, to summarize. It's cool.. understandable, right?

I try to lay it out there last night with...
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Money's pretty tight this month. Sucks cause I've really been needing to keep myself occupied.

I have a pretty big change coming up in January. The on again, off again girl is moving in with me.

I wish I didn't have to see everything mathematically. I always need to temper my expressions. They're too much for others to handle.

It's always a mistake to say what's on my mind.

I fall for it every time.

25 isn't supposed to feel old is it?

I woke up in such a bad mood. Still just not feelin it today.

I was excited about going to New Orleans to see the lady friend and Voodoo. Now I feel like I'm going just because I already bought tickets. She flipped the fuck out on the phone last night.

Relapse...

I just bought tickets to see Carina Round and Puscifer in Seattle.
That will follow closely after Voodoo Music Experience in New Orleans.

It hurts so good

I just need a date for the Seattle show

How about being hungry and being offered a piece of gum?
That analogy work?

I'm having trouble expressing my feelings about what a friend is and what a girlfriend is. When I'm lonely, the only relief I have is from having a full on partner to share my daily life with. Hanging out with people as an alternative is nice, but it doesn't come close....
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I am moving to a new apartment in 2 weeks. It has now been a year since I moved to Portland. I'm finding out that even when I move somewhere new, I can't escape myself, but it's not a lesson I will learn easily.

Start fresh.

Maybe one day the mere opportunity to be who I've wanted to be will be enough to pry me...
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I've always wanted to be the kind of person who kept a journal. I never felt like I had much to say. It would not be very interesting for someone to read. Perhaps I'm missing the point, or am I? Do we all fantisize that someday after we've expired our daily lives will be appreciated?

I just looked back my first page of posts. I...
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