I have a hunch that many of you SuicideGirls members sit there in your squalor-filled rooms, listening to sad songs with a straight razor pressed against one of your major arteries. Well, Tom Reynolds wrote a book just for you! It is called I Hate Myself and Want to Die: The 52 Most Depressing Songs You've Ever Heard, and if you dont want to kill yourself before you hear the songs on his list, you'll definitely be on the ledge after playing it a thousand times and screaming at yourself in the mirror.
Buy I Hate Myself and Want to Die
Daniel Robert Epstein: First tell me about the book cover.
Tom Reynolds: The illustrations were done by Stacey Earley. The cover design for this book was originally done in England by a record company called Sanctuary and then from there we licensed it. The foreign rights were then sold to Australia, Germany, the US, and then Poland.
DRE: Whose idea was the book?
Tom: I had written a book before about the outlaw motorcycle culture in the United States from the 40s to the present with the Hells Angels and everything. The year I ended that book, I moved to England. Four or five years later a publishing company called me and asked Hey we have this idea for this book. I think they were hitting the Guinness a little heavy that night. It was almost like a challenge so I took it on and ran with it.
DRE: It almost reminded me of Joe Queenan, because he would do stuff like watch every Merchant Ivory movie and then write an article on that. He did the same thing with every Dan Aykroyd movie.
Tom: Yeah hes pretty funny.
DRE: Which do you think is more brutal, watching every Dan Aykroyd movie or listening to so many depressing songs?
Tom: Id say watching every Dan Aykroyd movie would make me really annoyed. This is scarier to me because its not like these songs suck but theyre just so oppressive. Theres a difference between a sad song and a depressing song and thats what I was trying to concentrate on more. A depressing song doesnt necessarily make you cry, it just lays you out like you just dont want to do anything. For people who are so depressed that they dont get out of bed for three days, thats what a depressing song would do to you. Songs like that bring a big negative fog over you.
DRE: How did you find the songs?
Tom: I used to be a disc jockey years ago and I used to play in bands so I know an awful lot about music. So there were always songs that stuck in my subconscious no matter how much I try to get rid of them. But there are some songs in the book that I wasnt familiar with until someone told me about them and I was like wow, this is amazing.
DRE: Whats a good example of that?
Tom: One that stuck out for me was this song Artificial Flowers by Bobby Darin who is probably not remembered much nowadays. He was like a poor mans Frank Sinatra from the early 60s. This guy told me about Artificial Flowers and I listened to it and its got this really happy up-tempo big-band music to it but the songs about an orphan girl who dies of hypothermia and freezes to death in squalor. Its the weirdest song ever. I have ten different categories in the book and that song is the category I had no idea this song was so morbid.
DRE: Do you think that teenagers now will be able to relate to these songs?
Tom: I think they wont be bewildered by them because a lot of these songs have been around for a while and theyre still being played on the radio. If youre going to do a book about depressing music, youre really going to end up with 52,000 songs. But what I notice is that depressing music is released as singles more and more. You dont hear depressing music as much on the radio nowadays because they employ different kinds of programming now. They wouldnt dare put on some of these songs anymore. If you listen to hip-hop or top 40 stations, its all this up-tempo, really happy hip-hop rap stuff American Idol type things. They may do some lovelorn ballad or something like that but it doesnt hold a candle to some complete train wreck like Seasons in the Sun or something like that. But the book reached number three in Ireland and kids 17 and 18 years olds are loving the book.
DRE: But is it a whole range of people that buying these books?
Tom: I think its mostly music fans and Ive been noticing theres been two polarized reaction to the book. Either people really love it and they think its really hilarious or they think I am scum and they really hate it.
DRE: Because they think youre making fun of their songs?
Tom: No its not because Im making fun of their songs, its because Im making fun of depressing music in general. I found out that theres a huge fan base for really morbid depressing songs that talk about the really nihilistic things. Theyre talking about death and suicide and necrophilia and there are people who are really into it who are completely humorless. I dont address any of those kind of death metal for nihilistic punk songs in the book for that much because to me, those songs are trying too hard. Those songs dont make me depressed. I find them kind of laughable or maybe a little bit jarring but I dont find them depressing. They seem almost comical because theyre so over the top. To me the songs that are really depressing are the ones that are trying to be uplifting or cathartic and they just completely blew it.
DRE: But you are making fun of these songs too.
Tom: Oh yes, youve got to have fun with this. Some of the songs I write about in a positive way but theres a Carpenters song in there and I know the Carpenter songs are known for being pretty cheesy and stuff like this but I actually like the song. I like The Freshman by the Verve Pipe even though its a really depressing song about a girls suicide. Im sure most of the people I put in the book are not going to be that happy about it but whatever. I only attack one particular song, Bruce Springsteen's The River because it is a really dreary tease of a depressing song.
DRE: Did any artists that you mention in the book contact you?
Tom: Ive had a few kinds of reactions. Before we actually went to press, Morrisseys management saw what I had written and demanded he be pulled out of the book. I wrote an analysis of an old Smith song, Miserable Lie. The lyrics are really oppressive and it wiped me out. I didnt write a snarky review. I actually wrote it in a positive way because I think Johnny Marr is a fantastic guitar player. At the time Morrissey was on Sanctuarys record label and Sanctuary was also the publishing company that was doing the book in England, so as a courtesy they sent him the chapter. He never even saw it but his management read it and they were pissed so we took him out. Now to this day Im getting slammed by people who like the book because they say, I cant believe you didnt put any Smiths songs in there. Apparently not including a Smith song in a depressing music book is like leaving the resurrection out of the New Testament. So that was one. The second reaction was from Adam Duritz of Counting Crows. He was perplexed that I picked his song Round Here from their first album to be on the list. He said I wrote more depressing songs than that one. That songs about hope. I was like well I dont even want to know what your other depressing songs are.
DRE: Could there be a VH1 special based on the book?
Tom: I know its being pitched around for that. The only thing with VH1 is that they had done a 40 Worst Songs of All Time special and the only songs they pick are the ones they actually have the videos of. Something like this would involve an awful lot of licensing. I think it would make a great VH1 special.
by Daniel Robert Epstein
SG Username: AndersWolleck
Buy I Hate Myself and Want to Die
Daniel Robert Epstein: First tell me about the book cover.
Tom Reynolds: The illustrations were done by Stacey Earley. The cover design for this book was originally done in England by a record company called Sanctuary and then from there we licensed it. The foreign rights were then sold to Australia, Germany, the US, and then Poland.
DRE: Whose idea was the book?
Tom: I had written a book before about the outlaw motorcycle culture in the United States from the 40s to the present with the Hells Angels and everything. The year I ended that book, I moved to England. Four or five years later a publishing company called me and asked Hey we have this idea for this book. I think they were hitting the Guinness a little heavy that night. It was almost like a challenge so I took it on and ran with it.
DRE: It almost reminded me of Joe Queenan, because he would do stuff like watch every Merchant Ivory movie and then write an article on that. He did the same thing with every Dan Aykroyd movie.
Tom: Yeah hes pretty funny.
DRE: Which do you think is more brutal, watching every Dan Aykroyd movie or listening to so many depressing songs?
Tom: Id say watching every Dan Aykroyd movie would make me really annoyed. This is scarier to me because its not like these songs suck but theyre just so oppressive. Theres a difference between a sad song and a depressing song and thats what I was trying to concentrate on more. A depressing song doesnt necessarily make you cry, it just lays you out like you just dont want to do anything. For people who are so depressed that they dont get out of bed for three days, thats what a depressing song would do to you. Songs like that bring a big negative fog over you.
DRE: How did you find the songs?
Tom: I used to be a disc jockey years ago and I used to play in bands so I know an awful lot about music. So there were always songs that stuck in my subconscious no matter how much I try to get rid of them. But there are some songs in the book that I wasnt familiar with until someone told me about them and I was like wow, this is amazing.
DRE: Whats a good example of that?
Tom: One that stuck out for me was this song Artificial Flowers by Bobby Darin who is probably not remembered much nowadays. He was like a poor mans Frank Sinatra from the early 60s. This guy told me about Artificial Flowers and I listened to it and its got this really happy up-tempo big-band music to it but the songs about an orphan girl who dies of hypothermia and freezes to death in squalor. Its the weirdest song ever. I have ten different categories in the book and that song is the category I had no idea this song was so morbid.
DRE: Do you think that teenagers now will be able to relate to these songs?
Tom: I think they wont be bewildered by them because a lot of these songs have been around for a while and theyre still being played on the radio. If youre going to do a book about depressing music, youre really going to end up with 52,000 songs. But what I notice is that depressing music is released as singles more and more. You dont hear depressing music as much on the radio nowadays because they employ different kinds of programming now. They wouldnt dare put on some of these songs anymore. If you listen to hip-hop or top 40 stations, its all this up-tempo, really happy hip-hop rap stuff American Idol type things. They may do some lovelorn ballad or something like that but it doesnt hold a candle to some complete train wreck like Seasons in the Sun or something like that. But the book reached number three in Ireland and kids 17 and 18 years olds are loving the book.
DRE: But is it a whole range of people that buying these books?
Tom: I think its mostly music fans and Ive been noticing theres been two polarized reaction to the book. Either people really love it and they think its really hilarious or they think I am scum and they really hate it.
DRE: Because they think youre making fun of their songs?
Tom: No its not because Im making fun of their songs, its because Im making fun of depressing music in general. I found out that theres a huge fan base for really morbid depressing songs that talk about the really nihilistic things. Theyre talking about death and suicide and necrophilia and there are people who are really into it who are completely humorless. I dont address any of those kind of death metal for nihilistic punk songs in the book for that much because to me, those songs are trying too hard. Those songs dont make me depressed. I find them kind of laughable or maybe a little bit jarring but I dont find them depressing. They seem almost comical because theyre so over the top. To me the songs that are really depressing are the ones that are trying to be uplifting or cathartic and they just completely blew it.
DRE: But you are making fun of these songs too.
Tom: Oh yes, youve got to have fun with this. Some of the songs I write about in a positive way but theres a Carpenters song in there and I know the Carpenter songs are known for being pretty cheesy and stuff like this but I actually like the song. I like The Freshman by the Verve Pipe even though its a really depressing song about a girls suicide. Im sure most of the people I put in the book are not going to be that happy about it but whatever. I only attack one particular song, Bruce Springsteen's The River because it is a really dreary tease of a depressing song.
DRE: Did any artists that you mention in the book contact you?
Tom: Ive had a few kinds of reactions. Before we actually went to press, Morrisseys management saw what I had written and demanded he be pulled out of the book. I wrote an analysis of an old Smith song, Miserable Lie. The lyrics are really oppressive and it wiped me out. I didnt write a snarky review. I actually wrote it in a positive way because I think Johnny Marr is a fantastic guitar player. At the time Morrissey was on Sanctuarys record label and Sanctuary was also the publishing company that was doing the book in England, so as a courtesy they sent him the chapter. He never even saw it but his management read it and they were pissed so we took him out. Now to this day Im getting slammed by people who like the book because they say, I cant believe you didnt put any Smiths songs in there. Apparently not including a Smith song in a depressing music book is like leaving the resurrection out of the New Testament. So that was one. The second reaction was from Adam Duritz of Counting Crows. He was perplexed that I picked his song Round Here from their first album to be on the list. He said I wrote more depressing songs than that one. That songs about hope. I was like well I dont even want to know what your other depressing songs are.
DRE: Could there be a VH1 special based on the book?
Tom: I know its being pitched around for that. The only thing with VH1 is that they had done a 40 Worst Songs of All Time special and the only songs they pick are the ones they actually have the videos of. Something like this would involve an awful lot of licensing. I think it would make a great VH1 special.
by Daniel Robert Epstein
SG Username: AndersWolleck
VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
How coincidental.