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amory_ann_minx

Los Angeles, California

Member Since 2006

Followers 35 Following 30

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Sunday Jul 23, 2006

Jul 23, 2006
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Ok, so I haven't had a cigarette in three days now. I can feel my body trying to rejuvinate itself...but my psyche is falling to shit. I'm not happy...in fact, I'm depressed. But I don't want to smoke cigarettes anymore.

My boyfriend is moving from Phoenix soon. I'm excited...but I'm afraid. I'm afraid I won't live up to his humanly expectations of the 'perfect girlfriend.' I'm afraid of bad times. I'm afraid of fighting. Fuck...I'm afraid of a lot of things.

My hair is no longer black. I'm back to being a red-head. I really should just leave it alone now, for a long time....because my hair needs as much time to heal, as my lungs are going to need, after 6 years of consistant smoking a pack a day. Yuck.

Everything has changed...and i'm afraid. But I know I'll be fine. I always am.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
russtoleum:
change is scary but thats what makes it fun
Jul 25, 2006
mothra:
Change can be good. Getting used to new shit sucks, but in the end at least half the time it ends up being better right.

So you could win, you could lose... but you have to know.
Jul 27, 2006

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