alukh

Today was supposed to be my day off. So naturally I worked a full evening shift without a break. At some point in the evening I began composing a letter to anyone with young children, more specifically the hordes of them who insisted on having us cook for them. Here's what I came up with:


Dear Tourists With Disturbingly Large Numbers of Children,
Please do not go up to the salad bar and steal sunflower seeds unless you have purchased a trip to the salad bar. If you then insist upon giving half our supply of sunflower seeds to your offspring so that they can dump them out on the table and cover the existing carpet

with a layer of them, please do not lie to me about leaving me a tip on the table when you come up to pay your bill.

Kthx,
Alukh


When I was asked to work 5-8 today I didn't realize that I would be there until almost 11 trying futilely to make a dent in the disgusting mess that tourists had made of our dining area.

Oh yeah. That looks much better.


Trivia: Okay, that's it. I'm opposed to human procreation in general. I also can't fathom why people would deliberately spend their vacation time in the small, seedy, enormous black ant-infested beach town in which I work.