alpo

I got home from running some errands and immediately noticed a huge plume of heavy, acrid smoke blowing from the chimney of the friendly neighborhood meth house down the street, making me cough and my eyes water. I called the police non-emergency number, figuring the authorities would want to come take a look and try to catch the tweakers in the act of burning toxic byproducts in the fireplace, or, at the very least, add to their file of observations that they can use to eventually condemn the property and displace the miscreants as they've been promising to do for years. A firetruck and several police cruisers showed up almost immediately and I thought, "Ah, now we're getting somewhere." Fifteen minutes later the fire captain knocked on my door and told me

• they'd asked the owner of the house what he was doing,
• he'd told them innocently that he was just burning some wood, and
• there was nothing more they could do at this time, but to call again if I noticed anything strange going on.

I just love knowing my tax dollars are being spent well.