alaynah

i have begun to feel transparent. my speech is poor, my head is in the clouds (literally) and i have nothing to show for my life. most people who know me have made the mistake of thinking all i care about are the drugs out in the world. the return of school has brought on the return of my massive social anxiety problem. the doubt is strong in this one.
today i finally got motivated enough to pick up my painting i had entered into the exhibition. i really do not understand why the piece didn't make it, and to be honest it has messed with my head a great deal. i am so unstable and looking for substance--in life, in friends, in work.
***end rant***