Thursday
G Funk's birthday was last month, but I didn't get gim anything. I'd planned to take him out to 6th St,, but our plans got fucked up and he went out the night before i got to town. Since I didn't get him anything and he'd never been to a strip club before, I decided to treat him to the best lap dance possible. A free one.
For me, strip clubs are equal parts fun and pain. On the one hand, I like titties, and any time I get to see them is, by and large, good. On the other hand, I'm always conscious of the fact that, no matter how charming or affectionate the girls might seem, all they want is your money. Call me nostaligc, or naive, or an asshole, but knowing that takes a lot of the fun out of it.
My friend Dirty White Boy had come over earlier with a couple bottles of Chimay (a most excellent beer, by the way, and brewed by monks), so I was already buzzed by the time I picked up G Funk. My driving was a bit erratic and aggressive, and G extorted a promise from me that I wouldn't dink alcohol at the club, so I had myself a blast knocking back cranberry and club sodas. G spent about thirty minutes observing the girls until he found one who really caught his eye. I bought him a cigar, a gin and tonic , and a lap dance; suddenly, I'd shot about 80 dollars straight to hell. But it was all worth it, because it was the single present he'd ever had.
Friday
Friday came and went uneventfully. Work sucked, as work is wont to be. The new waitress on whom I have a crush has a boyfriend, which increased the general suckitdue of work. Nonetheless, she's level headed and eager to chat, and I'm sure her man will die in a fiery car crash or an industrial accident, so it's all good.
Phoenix Down played an acoustic show at Graffiti's that evening. I was one of three members of the audience (which included EE's girlfriend and the guitartists girlfriend) who actually went to see the band instead of just hearing the band because they were at the bar. The show rocked about as hard as an acoustic show can; it's a good thing they play songs that I enjoy, because it would gargle balls if I supported EE and his band played shit I hated.
Saturday
The weekend is the hardest time at the diner. There's something about lower income families and the diner on the weekend. Whole families come to the diner; people bring their friends and co-workers. Huge parties of otherwise normal people decide that eating at the diner is a good way to spend their morning. My manager is a sadistic, cruel man; since the last busperson quit, I get to do the work that two people would normally do, and no matter how hard I work, he always yells at me for being too slow. And then he whips me. With an electrical cord.The yelling and complainging, I can deal with that. The electrical cord beatings, not so much.
Phoenix Down played their last show before their big charity concert on September 22. They were entrertaining, although it didn't help that the lead singer was stoned. I actually got to play a heavy for the evening; a couple of drunk idiots were hitting on the daughter of the drummer. (The drummer is 35 years old and has three kids; his daughters 14. I thought it would was pretty funny that the idiots were going after jailbait, but he wasn't too amused by it). Not only did I get to haul instruments and drink free beer, I got to babysit a 14 year old girl. Hot damn, that's fun.
G Funk's birthday was last month, but I didn't get gim anything. I'd planned to take him out to 6th St,, but our plans got fucked up and he went out the night before i got to town. Since I didn't get him anything and he'd never been to a strip club before, I decided to treat him to the best lap dance possible. A free one.
For me, strip clubs are equal parts fun and pain. On the one hand, I like titties, and any time I get to see them is, by and large, good. On the other hand, I'm always conscious of the fact that, no matter how charming or affectionate the girls might seem, all they want is your money. Call me nostaligc, or naive, or an asshole, but knowing that takes a lot of the fun out of it.
My friend Dirty White Boy had come over earlier with a couple bottles of Chimay (a most excellent beer, by the way, and brewed by monks), so I was already buzzed by the time I picked up G Funk. My driving was a bit erratic and aggressive, and G extorted a promise from me that I wouldn't dink alcohol at the club, so I had myself a blast knocking back cranberry and club sodas. G spent about thirty minutes observing the girls until he found one who really caught his eye. I bought him a cigar, a gin and tonic , and a lap dance; suddenly, I'd shot about 80 dollars straight to hell. But it was all worth it, because it was the single present he'd ever had.
Friday
Friday came and went uneventfully. Work sucked, as work is wont to be. The new waitress on whom I have a crush has a boyfriend, which increased the general suckitdue of work. Nonetheless, she's level headed and eager to chat, and I'm sure her man will die in a fiery car crash or an industrial accident, so it's all good.
Phoenix Down played an acoustic show at Graffiti's that evening. I was one of three members of the audience (which included EE's girlfriend and the guitartists girlfriend) who actually went to see the band instead of just hearing the band because they were at the bar. The show rocked about as hard as an acoustic show can; it's a good thing they play songs that I enjoy, because it would gargle balls if I supported EE and his band played shit I hated.
Saturday
The weekend is the hardest time at the diner. There's something about lower income families and the diner on the weekend. Whole families come to the diner; people bring their friends and co-workers. Huge parties of otherwise normal people decide that eating at the diner is a good way to spend their morning. My manager is a sadistic, cruel man; since the last busperson quit, I get to do the work that two people would normally do, and no matter how hard I work, he always yells at me for being too slow. And then he whips me. With an electrical cord.The yelling and complainging, I can deal with that. The electrical cord beatings, not so much.
Phoenix Down played their last show before their big charity concert on September 22. They were entrertaining, although it didn't help that the lead singer was stoned. I actually got to play a heavy for the evening; a couple of drunk idiots were hitting on the daughter of the drummer. (The drummer is 35 years old and has three kids; his daughters 14. I thought it would was pretty funny that the idiots were going after jailbait, but he wasn't too amused by it). Not only did I get to haul instruments and drink free beer, I got to babysit a 14 year old girl. Hot damn, that's fun.
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
cain:
Heeeehehe, you made me chuckle.
borderlinegirl:
well take me out..........