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akasha823

Somewhere in the great beyond

Member Since 2004

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Thursday Sep 13, 2007

Sep 13, 2007
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So here is a question: Can people really change?

As all of you who have been reading my blog know- I have an asshole for a brother.

I love him because he is my brother; but I really don't like him AT ALL.

And to be honest- his behavior reminds me of my ex fiance, JackAss. And that makes me dislike him even more. I left JackAss 4 years ago and I cannot escape the awful memory of him because my bro is just like him.

The common factors they share:
Victim mentality. Everyone else has problems and he is a saint. We are all against him. We don't want him to be happy.... the list goes on.

And when confronted with the issues that he has or the problems that he causes- he promises to change. he will make minimal improvements and then when the pressure is off- BOOM, he goes right back to the same behavior.

So this leads me to believe that change is one of those things that comes about after people hit rock bottom. I have been there and I changed and continue to make the changes that I need to.

A while back, I thought my brother had gotten to his bottom and truly was going to try to make a change. And when Mom got sick, I thought he would improve again. But he is back to the same old shit.

My folks won't sell the house for a while. Cause of the market and cause my Mom isn't well enough to get here yet. It is convenient for me and helps me out to live here, but there are times where I just want to pack it up and leave just to get away from the situation.

But FUCK THAT. I pay rent and help my folks out and have every right to be here too. And actually more than my bro.

So I am going to yet again try to change. Like I said a few days ago. I have to let go of the stress that is causing my pain. A lot of that has to do with realizing that he is never going to change.

I am the type of person to always try to make those around me happy, often at my own detriment. That has to stop because it is only huritng me.

The prompt of all this is a fight I just had with my bro over money he owes me. And of course, I am the bad guy becasue I can't read his mind.

Oh well.

Thanks as always for listening.

XOXO
giggles:
I think people have change once they realize that whatever needs to change is a problem for themselves or others. Sadly some people don't realize how much of an ass they are.
Sep 14, 2007
junnie:
You are so strong. But remeber you want to take care of you too. People can change, but they have to want to.
Sep 17, 2007

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