I have a strong desire to post a blog, mostly for myself just gotta figure some shit out in my head.
First i guess, i always get depressed during the holidays. I really dont know why, I just really hate christmas and thanks giving. I dont know if it has to do with the fact that my family is so messed up, and i just hate sitting at the table, or at the christmas tree and pretending not to notice how much my parents hate each other. Possibly cause I'm a vegetarian, and semi buddhist, and i just think its all rather pointless. I just really hate how fake people seem to be during the holidays, i dont mean everyone. But its the people that fake the christmas/thanks giving cheer to i do know fit in i guess. Which any person that pretends to be something they arent for the sake of being popular really just irratates me.
School starts in less than 3 weeks. And im really starting to get scared. I keep wondering if im smart or strong enough to even do this. It's probably gonna be one of the hardest things i ever done in my life. I'm nothin special i know that, so something like this that seems so great, seems like near impossible. I think i can do it, but theres probably always gonna be that voice in the back of my head pushing me to quit, or telling me i cant do it.
I met this girl.... I really hate love. After the last time my heart got broken i really didnt want this at all. I was doing everything i could to avoid having feelings for some1. But shes just so amazing. And the fact that she cares about me, and loves me like i love her scares me shitless. Its not perfect by any means, and i dont know how to get around just saying it but she lives pretty much on the other side fo the world. Born and raised in germany. Which makes things pretty difficult. Both of us are kinda down and out at the moment. I have very limited money, and the same with her. But have u ever met some1 that u just click with? Its like scary how much we have in common and are alike. Shes an amazing and beautiful woman, 2 gorgeous kids, and for whatever crazy reason shes interested in me. We talk hours everyday, and we are planning on meeting as soon we can once im done with skool april 2010.
And finally, since my time on SG is more than likely coming to a close in the next couple months, id just like to thank any and all of u who have read my blogs, cried with me and suppouted me. This has been one of the best communities o have been a part of. U all are amazing people, and im glad to know u all. I wish i could stay, but i really dont think i will have the money to do so. I havent been here as much as i would have even liked the last few months for various reasons. But to my true friends thank u all.
Ryuu
First i guess, i always get depressed during the holidays. I really dont know why, I just really hate christmas and thanks giving. I dont know if it has to do with the fact that my family is so messed up, and i just hate sitting at the table, or at the christmas tree and pretending not to notice how much my parents hate each other. Possibly cause I'm a vegetarian, and semi buddhist, and i just think its all rather pointless. I just really hate how fake people seem to be during the holidays, i dont mean everyone. But its the people that fake the christmas/thanks giving cheer to i do know fit in i guess. Which any person that pretends to be something they arent for the sake of being popular really just irratates me.
School starts in less than 3 weeks. And im really starting to get scared. I keep wondering if im smart or strong enough to even do this. It's probably gonna be one of the hardest things i ever done in my life. I'm nothin special i know that, so something like this that seems so great, seems like near impossible. I think i can do it, but theres probably always gonna be that voice in the back of my head pushing me to quit, or telling me i cant do it.
I met this girl.... I really hate love. After the last time my heart got broken i really didnt want this at all. I was doing everything i could to avoid having feelings for some1. But shes just so amazing. And the fact that she cares about me, and loves me like i love her scares me shitless. Its not perfect by any means, and i dont know how to get around just saying it but she lives pretty much on the other side fo the world. Born and raised in germany. Which makes things pretty difficult. Both of us are kinda down and out at the moment. I have very limited money, and the same with her. But have u ever met some1 that u just click with? Its like scary how much we have in common and are alike. Shes an amazing and beautiful woman, 2 gorgeous kids, and for whatever crazy reason shes interested in me. We talk hours everyday, and we are planning on meeting as soon we can once im done with skool april 2010.
And finally, since my time on SG is more than likely coming to a close in the next couple months, id just like to thank any and all of u who have read my blogs, cried with me and suppouted me. This has been one of the best communities o have been a part of. U all are amazing people, and im glad to know u all. I wish i could stay, but i really dont think i will have the money to do so. I havent been here as much as i would have even liked the last few months for various reasons. But to my true friends thank u all.
Ryuu
_holden_:
I will definitely miss your presence on the site. You were one of my very first friends on here. Good luck with school I think you will do well and I hope things work out with you and your girl. It's always nice to feel wanted, needed, and loved. Take care of yourself!