As I ahve left another friend's house.As I have left another who's heart layed restless and broken with defeat and pain.As I take another soft embracing breath I realize my touch is also a burden at times.For this lovely new spiritual opening,I realized that many embrace my being,many long to taste my scarred and torn flesh.So many find comfort in me,find safety and care.So many come to me and I embrace all walks.But in the end as I've embraced so many,as I have awakened vast numbers even I am closed to realizing m true impact on people.I know I am rare and wonderful,and what I do for people is a true gift,and a selfless one at that.And as time fades many emotions,and pains from my weak hands I walk alone.i am left to wonder as the sun sets am I meant to walk this way,without comfort and a companion,a human trait washes over me and burns deep thoughts into my charred brain.My spirit sinks low and my heart beats faintly as I embrace the pain of another friend.Sickness follows deep into my veins and I know soon what I take away will only consume and defeat me.I know soon that sickness will arise and grasp me again.I am fearful not of death,or life,but that fact of being alone in so many battles I endure to protect so many.Truth is soon I face something old,something from my past,and I know it is near.I am not fearful of it for I know this will either break me or continue my descent into the skies and bring me light.I wish that people would embrace the old,I am quite tired and need someone to listen to that of compassion.
rayden:
i have never had a close encounter with death in any way to create a fear like that....its just something that makes me sick to think about..i dont know how it came about, but i just realized it one day as i was watching a movie and i realized that i never wanted to die that way...it seems to slow.