Some Random Facts About Me:
*My middle name is "Guess". This confuses the majority of people who ask me what my middle name is.
*After twenty years of thorough research, it was discovered that I am actually the product of a year long affair between Pee Wee Herman and Chewbacca.
*I am the orginial source for the legend of the Loch Ness Monster.
*My bodily secretions are infact highly explosive if mixed with orange juice, and so my every move is tracked by a team of governement agents with instructions to kill me should I fall into enemy hands.
*Im one of only three men living who know the exact formula to the KFC secret blend of spices
*My childhood adventures were the basis of Ghostbusters 2 and The Warriors.
*Never expose me to sunlight. Never get me wet. And never, ever, feed me after midnight.
*I am a vehement anti-environmentalist, and was actully born Vincenzo Baldermort Unleaded, but changed my surname to appease my own pro-pollution views.
*I once built a stairway to heaven, but was forced destroyed it to avoid paying royalties.
*I was taught everything I know by Bonnie M, but subsequently ate his brain.
*All of the socks you lose in the washing machine rest soundly on my mantle piece.
*I originally made the cinematic masterpiece 'The Wizard of Oz' all by myself, playing every single character. But right before it was released the Screen Actors Guild called foul play and it was re-shot starring Judy Garland. I later had a brief affair with Toto. But broke it off because of Toto's drinking problem.
*I know the last digit of Pi. Its between 0 - 9.
*I am in fact also 4 other people: Bill Gates, George Lucas, Julian Clary and Barry Manilow.
*All the Elements of the Periodic Table can be found between the cushions of my sofa bed.
*I was Shakespeare's inspiration for both Romeo and Juliet, and acted both parts during the first ten years of the play's London productions. I had to stop, however, when Queen Elizabeth died and appointed me as her successor.
*I once attempted to shave Michael Moore's neckbeard, but failed upon realizing that the hairs were actually tiny Malaysian children.
Contary to popular belief, I have never knelt before Zod.
Some Random Facts About Other People:
*Steven Segal has been known to sellotape C4 to Tortoises and use them as a cheap alternative to hand grenades.
*Clint Eastwood eats coal, shits diamonds, and then sells the diamonds to buy more coal.
*When Old Mother Hubbard went to the cupboard Joe Pesci was there and told her dog to fuck off.
*Slash has never tasted a lime and chooses not to.
*"Vin Diesel had a little lamb/Little lamb little lamb/Vin Diesel had a little lamb/Its fleece was hard as hell" -last transmission from U-1226.
*'Arnold Schwarzenegger' gives 3,620,730 points on Scrabble and is the only true killer move in the game.
*Carol Vordaman stole Christmas and blamed it on the Grinch.
*Terry Wogan can predict the shuffle on his iPod.
*Groucho Marx once dated Henri Winkler.
*After reading an article about the Frenchman who eats bicycles and household appliances in a children's "fun facts" book, Ben Affleck threw the book to the ground, screamed "That fucking pussy ain't worth shit," and proceeded to eat everything in his mansion, including (but not limited to: ) two Porsches, a Ducati motorcycle, a 60" plasma screen TV, four maids (two Puerto Rican, one caucasian, and one Chinese,) half a stick of butter, and a box full of broken glass. He then ate the house itself, "for good measure." This all occured over a three-day period last July.
*Guns don't kill people, Chaz (from popular duet Chaz and Dave) kills people. Sometimes with guns.
*Alice Cooper still pronounces spaghetti 'pasghetti'.
Well, there you go. Thats that.
I shall now endever to leave a little know fact about me everytime I update my journal.
Tally Ho'
*My middle name is "Guess". This confuses the majority of people who ask me what my middle name is.
*After twenty years of thorough research, it was discovered that I am actually the product of a year long affair between Pee Wee Herman and Chewbacca.
*I am the orginial source for the legend of the Loch Ness Monster.
*My bodily secretions are infact highly explosive if mixed with orange juice, and so my every move is tracked by a team of governement agents with instructions to kill me should I fall into enemy hands.
*Im one of only three men living who know the exact formula to the KFC secret blend of spices
*My childhood adventures were the basis of Ghostbusters 2 and The Warriors.
*Never expose me to sunlight. Never get me wet. And never, ever, feed me after midnight.
*I am a vehement anti-environmentalist, and was actully born Vincenzo Baldermort Unleaded, but changed my surname to appease my own pro-pollution views.
*I once built a stairway to heaven, but was forced destroyed it to avoid paying royalties.
*I was taught everything I know by Bonnie M, but subsequently ate his brain.
*All of the socks you lose in the washing machine rest soundly on my mantle piece.
*I originally made the cinematic masterpiece 'The Wizard of Oz' all by myself, playing every single character. But right before it was released the Screen Actors Guild called foul play and it was re-shot starring Judy Garland. I later had a brief affair with Toto. But broke it off because of Toto's drinking problem.
*I know the last digit of Pi. Its between 0 - 9.
*I am in fact also 4 other people: Bill Gates, George Lucas, Julian Clary and Barry Manilow.
*All the Elements of the Periodic Table can be found between the cushions of my sofa bed.
*I was Shakespeare's inspiration for both Romeo and Juliet, and acted both parts during the first ten years of the play's London productions. I had to stop, however, when Queen Elizabeth died and appointed me as her successor.
*I once attempted to shave Michael Moore's neckbeard, but failed upon realizing that the hairs were actually tiny Malaysian children.
Contary to popular belief, I have never knelt before Zod.
Some Random Facts About Other People:
*Steven Segal has been known to sellotape C4 to Tortoises and use them as a cheap alternative to hand grenades.
*Clint Eastwood eats coal, shits diamonds, and then sells the diamonds to buy more coal.
*When Old Mother Hubbard went to the cupboard Joe Pesci was there and told her dog to fuck off.
*Slash has never tasted a lime and chooses not to.
*"Vin Diesel had a little lamb/Little lamb little lamb/Vin Diesel had a little lamb/Its fleece was hard as hell" -last transmission from U-1226.
*'Arnold Schwarzenegger' gives 3,620,730 points on Scrabble and is the only true killer move in the game.
*Carol Vordaman stole Christmas and blamed it on the Grinch.
*Terry Wogan can predict the shuffle on his iPod.
*Groucho Marx once dated Henri Winkler.
*After reading an article about the Frenchman who eats bicycles and household appliances in a children's "fun facts" book, Ben Affleck threw the book to the ground, screamed "That fucking pussy ain't worth shit," and proceeded to eat everything in his mansion, including (but not limited to: ) two Porsches, a Ducati motorcycle, a 60" plasma screen TV, four maids (two Puerto Rican, one caucasian, and one Chinese,) half a stick of butter, and a box full of broken glass. He then ate the house itself, "for good measure." This all occured over a three-day period last July.
*Guns don't kill people, Chaz (from popular duet Chaz and Dave) kills people. Sometimes with guns.
*Alice Cooper still pronounces spaghetti 'pasghetti'.
Well, there you go. Thats that.
I shall now endever to leave a little know fact about me everytime I update my journal.
Tally Ho'
VIEW 17 of 17 COMMENTS
leylei:
in the proccess of colouring my hair, it's orange now still, another 40 pounds of bleach should make it glisten all blonde like thats all i've done and cleaned my kitchen
thats all i've done and cleaned my kitchen
summer:
did you delete me and then re-add me? 
i could have sworn we were friends before!
i could have sworn we were friends before!