Yeah my van blew up today... 
I was at the Hilton Hotel in Warwick, just finished loading a PA, started to reverse out of the car park and noticed smoke in the mirror. Backed out about 5 yards then noticed shit loads of smoke billowing out So I jumped out, taking the keys with me. The van continued to keep reving its arse off. At this point, I was thinking 
"Ey' up, theres something wrong here!" So I phoned one of the guys I work with and was shouting down the phone:
"Dude, there something seriously fucked up going on with the van!" ..."Like what man?" ..."Its on fuckin' fire!" ..."Shit!"..."You're fuckin' telling me!"..."Crap!...Jay I'll phone you back in a sec!" [hangs up]
So, shitting myself, wandering what to do, so I run round to the front of the hotel and into reception to find whoever looks the most 'incharge'. So I find an Asian guy in a suit:
"Hey, man er...theres a problem with my va..." [BOOM]..........[fire alarms]...
"...Nevermind..."
I then turned an just walked straight back out of the foyer, half laughing. I walk back around the back of the building to see an enormous cloud of smoke and a glowing coming from the middle of it. I scratch my head and sit down on the curb. By this time the entire hotel is being evacuated. A couple of minutes later 3 fire engines pull up shortly followed by an ambulence and a police car. "Shit!...Ive blown up work's van...Im gonna get bollocked for this I fuckin' know it." At this point, I phoned my best mate Si (who I had phoned about 45mins earlier to tell that I was having to drive a new BIG fuck off 'sprinter' van which was a bitch to park.
"Yo man, whats up?" "Yeah, you know that van I was telling you about...?" "You've fuckin' crashed it aint ya?" "Not quite man." "Huh?" "Ive blown it up..." "WHAT!?" "Ive blown it the fuck up man. Shit. The whole hotel's been evacuated!" "WHAT!?" "The Hilton!" "WHAT!?" "Im at the Hilton. My van's blown up. The hotel's been evacuated. There's 3 fire engines, an ambulence and a police car!" "Shit man...That sucks." "Ahhhhhhhhhh!... Look Ill phone you back the fireman wants my details." "Ok man, bye"
So I give my details, and wait around till the fire's out. In the mean time, a little kid about 9 or 10 comes upto me on his bike.
"Is that your van?" "Yeah, man...sucks huh?" "It was on fire when yo came in." "What?" "There was smoke coming out of it when you drove in." "Did you tell anyone?" "No." "Cheers." "What happened?" "Dunno." "Did anyone die?" "Nah" "Oh"
After about 30secs of uncomfortable silence the kid rode off and started talking to people in the crowd watching. The little git was proberly tell them another guy was burnt to death or something... He looked evil.
Anyway, the fire was pretty quickly put out and I was later told that it was most likely that the turbo had exploded and filled the engine full of oil cause there was none left in the tank. This would have built the pressure up, blowing the engine, this in turn caused the deisel to leak and set on fire... Great, like my day didnt suck enough as it was. Well, long story short I lived, the van died and everyone at Warwick Hilton got soked in the rain because of me.
Sorry!
(I took a few pictures on my mobile, I've put them on my pics page!)
Oh, Nadine sorry I couldnt make it to Cheltnaham tonite
Hope you had a good time though 
In other none explosive news (and for you lazy gits that havent read any of my other stuff
) Our 3rd studio album will be smashing into the UK and US towards the end of Febuary if all goes well. It will be avalible through all good record stores and bad ones (esspecially the bad ones) Just like the others. All the recording was done and dusted in Colchester last month, we're now waiting for Jo Barressi to finish work on the new Queens Of The Stoneage album (which has got one of the guys from ZZ Top playing on it by the way!! ) and get his ass over here once again to master ours... Which (if you missed it) will be called "How The Great Have Fallen" Once again heres the track listing, scum fuc's!
1. A Different Shade of Shit
2. Oh how the Great Have Fallen
3. Dead Man Walking
4. Master Of Disaster
5. Snatching Defeat From the Jaws of Victory
6. How Much Can a Man take
7. Fuck You Pay Me
8. Slay The Coward
9. The Infidel is Dead
10. Dont Let The Bastards Grind You Down
There will also be covers of Kiss's 'God of Thunder' and the Kinks 'Hatred' Shhhhhhwing! And yes I will unashamebly plug the new album till all you mother fuckers own a copy! Dunno about you guys in the States but you should be able to get hold of 'Live and Demos' which was released earlier this year. It was basicly a 'filler' inbetween records because of band problems. Either way it rocks your nads off so go and buy that in the meantime!
Oh, if you can be bothered Ive got demos of a couple of sideprojects im fuckin' around with at the mo. Just gimmie a shout and Ill mail you em'
Only one of them is actully named at present (Army of Me) and is kinda sounding down the lines of Converge, Isis, Superjoint Ritual, Norma Jean etc etc... The other's more like Fugazi, Black Flag, Fu Manchu, early Kyuss etc. Bit more Grungey. So what ever floats your boat just let me know and Ill rip you off a copy and whack it in the post. Snooge!
love you all!
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
I was at the Hilton Hotel in Warwick, just finished loading a PA, started to reverse out of the car park and noticed smoke in the mirror. Backed out about 5 yards then noticed shit loads of smoke billowing out
So I jumped out, taking the keys with me. The van continued to keep reving its arse off. At this point, I was thinking "Ey' up, theres something wrong here!" So I phoned one of the guys I work with and was shouting down the phone:
"Dude, there something seriously fucked up going on with the van!" ..."Like what man?" ..."Its on fuckin' fire!" ..."Shit!"..."You're fuckin' telling me!"..."Crap!...Jay I'll phone you back in a sec!" [hangs up]
So, shitting myself, wandering what to do, so I run round to the front of the hotel and into reception to find whoever looks the most 'incharge'. So I find an Asian guy in a suit:
"Hey, man er...theres a problem with my va..." [BOOM]..........[fire alarms]...
"...Nevermind..."
I then turned an just walked straight back out of the foyer, half laughing. I walk back around the back of the building to see an enormous cloud of smoke and a glowing coming from the middle of it. I scratch my head and sit down on the curb. By this time the entire hotel is being evacuated. A couple of minutes later 3 fire engines pull up shortly followed by an ambulence and a police car. "Shit!...Ive blown up work's van...Im gonna get bollocked for this I fuckin' know it." At this point, I phoned my best mate Si (who I had phoned about 45mins earlier to tell that I was having to drive a new BIG fuck off 'sprinter' van which was a bitch to park.
"Yo man, whats up?" "Yeah, you know that van I was telling you about...?" "You've fuckin' crashed it aint ya?" "Not quite man." "Huh?" "Ive blown it up..." "WHAT!?" "Ive blown it the fuck up man. Shit. The whole hotel's been evacuated!" "WHAT!?" "The Hilton!" "WHAT!?" "Im at the Hilton. My van's blown up. The hotel's been evacuated. There's 3 fire engines, an ambulence and a police car!" "Shit man...That sucks." "Ahhhhhhhhhh!... Look Ill phone you back the fireman wants my details." "Ok man, bye"
So I give my details, and wait around till the fire's out. In the mean time, a little kid about 9 or 10 comes upto me on his bike.
"Is that your van?" "Yeah, man...sucks huh?" "It was on fire when yo came in." "What?" "There was smoke coming out of it when you drove in." "Did you tell anyone?" "No." "Cheers." "What happened?" "Dunno." "Did anyone die?" "Nah" "Oh"
After about 30secs of uncomfortable silence the kid rode off and started talking to people in the crowd watching. The little git was proberly tell them another guy was burnt to death or something... He looked evil.
Anyway, the fire was pretty quickly put out and I was later told that it was most likely that the turbo had exploded and filled the engine full of oil cause there was none left in the tank. This would have built the pressure up, blowing the engine, this in turn caused the deisel to leak and set on fire... Great, like my day didnt suck enough as it was. Well, long story short I lived, the van died and everyone at Warwick Hilton got soked in the rain because of me.
Sorry!
(I took a few pictures on my mobile, I've put them on my pics page!)
Oh, Nadine sorry I couldnt make it to Cheltnaham tonite
Hope you had a good time though
In other none explosive news (and for you lazy gits that havent read any of my other stuff
) Our 3rd studio album will be smashing into the UK and US towards the end of Febuary if all goes well. It will be avalible through all good record stores and bad ones (esspecially the bad ones) Just like the others. All the recording was done and dusted in Colchester last month, we're now waiting for Jo Barressi to finish work on the new Queens Of The Stoneage album (which has got one of the guys from ZZ Top playing on it by the way!! ) and get his ass over here once again to master ours... Which (if you missed it) will be called "How The Great Have Fallen" Once again heres the track listing, scum fuc's!
1. A Different Shade of Shit
2. Oh how the Great Have Fallen
3. Dead Man Walking
4. Master Of Disaster
5. Snatching Defeat From the Jaws of Victory
6. How Much Can a Man take
7. Fuck You Pay Me
8. Slay The Coward
9. The Infidel is Dead
10. Dont Let The Bastards Grind You Down
There will also be covers of Kiss's 'God of Thunder' and the Kinks 'Hatred'
Shhhhhhwing! And yes I will unashamebly plug the new album till all you mother fuckers own a copy! Dunno about you guys in the States but you should be able to get hold of 'Live and Demos' which was released earlier this year. It was basicly a 'filler' inbetween records because of band problems. Either way it rocks your nads off so go and buy that in the meantime!
Oh, if you can be bothered Ive got demos of a couple of sideprojects im fuckin' around with at the mo. Just gimmie a shout and Ill mail you em'
Only one of them is actully named at present (Army of Me) and is kinda sounding down the lines of Converge, Isis, Superjoint Ritual, Norma Jean etc etc... The other's more like Fugazi, Black Flag, Fu Manchu, early Kyuss etc. Bit more Grungey. So what ever floats your boat just let me know and Ill rip you off a copy and whack it in the post. Snooge!
love you all!
xxxxxxxxxxxxx
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
hope your ok all vanless now!