aeryka

its been two weeks since my tattoo and its doing just fine. all done scabbing but its still itchy sometimes.

so since i cant find a fucking apprenticeship i've gotten myself re-hired at my old highschool job. I know what im doing, alot of people i used to work with are still there, and its money. Hopefully ill get a decent amount of hours and make some cash so i can take care of myself instead of borrowing from mom and dad. plus it gets me out of the house and keeps my mind off all the stuff thats bugging me.

the summer is almost over. one friend is moving for prague today to teach english for a year. we had a get together at my house to watch the big lebowski, drink white russians and then go bowling. it went great and i had a great time with my old friends. im sad to see him go because i was so happy that we were both back from college and now hes leaving again.

and then my best friend from school who is a few hours south is moving to freakin maine. it was bad enough that we arent living together anymore but now shes going to be 1300 miles away. im scared for her but also excited because she needs this. she needs to get out of her parents house.

EDIT: My friend is moving to Maine to start a job in the Americorps working with kids. She desperately needs the money to get there. I would help her but i'm just as broke! Her parents can't/won't help. She just need the cash to get there and get set up. If you can help she would be incredibly grateful!

Help my friend!

ok back to what i was originally talking about.....
and then the coup de grce. the guy i've been dating on and off for the past 5 years is moving to Seattle. 2000 miles away. our relationship has been rocky for a while now. we dont get along very well and have been trying for years now to simply be friends with little to no success on the just friends part. it works for a while and then something happens and it all crumbles again. its been the hardest thing ive ever done in my life. im terrified that this person i love is going to never come back let alone talk to me. hes so busy right now and wont talk to me because more often than not we argue or i simply freak out about things. i cant understand this move and he wont talk to me about it. i miss him already.

i feel like the people i love the most are leaving. i mean i understand that they need to do these things for themselves. but experiences have taught me that when people move, they forget about you. sometimes no matter how hard i try things just dissolve. this growing up shit sucks. everyone leaves.

im hoping with the money i will be making will allow me to take a little trip down to carbondale sometime in the early fall. i also want to try and make a trip to my cabin in Wisconsin around the same time. i hope i can find a friend to go with me or a few.

well i guess ill go shower. not sure theres a point today but i smell.