adrockie

So i was surfing through craigslist and found a guy searching for a female-
He said he would respond to everyone who wrote him. So i decided to write him.
here is what happened.


MY FIRST EMAIL TO HIM:

I tried the bad boy thing also, so now i'm trying the bad girl thing.
SCENE EXT:
me in a wig, my junk duct taped between my legs. We enjoy a day of shopping and food at the southpoint mall followed by drinks at a wine bar. We drink a little too much. You place your hand on my face, feeling my 5 o'clock shadow. I smile. You hear muffled noises from my purse. I change the subject when you inquire what could be inside. I take off my pumps to get more comfortable. As i pull my legs underneath my muscular, apple- like ass, you notice that I am wearing thigh highs. This drives you crazy. We vote to get on my moped and go to your place. I let you wear my helmet.

SCENE INT:
after heading back to your place I do my best Randy Savage Impression which sends chills up your spine. I put lipstick on you. and tape your eyelids shut and remove all your clothing. I take two kittens out of my oversized purse and a a 1/2 a gallon of milk. Over the course of the next 5 hours I pour milk all over your body and we allow the kittens to lick all evidence of Milk, skin and hair from your physique. I'm still dressed like Randy Savage, never breaking out of character. I take out my slim-jim. You dectect the scent delicious gas station jerky. I let you nibble a little, taking photos, in which I will email to your mother later. My nipples become hard, revealing themselves through my dense chest hair. I'm slightly embarrased, so I must slap you repeatedly as an affirmation of my position as alpha-male in this scenareo.
Just before daylight I glue pages from Vintage National Geographics on you while I whisper profanities into your ear. I go through your cell phone, Call your boss telling him what a good boy you've been and send him phone cam pics of the state you are in. He eventually shows up himself, dressed to the nine as a construction worker and with an overly suggestive sign stating "RAISED MANHOLES".
I cuss at him in german in which he trys to squirm out of the subject referring to you as his 'roadwork'. I tell him that there is no speeding in work zones. and then he pulls out his jackhammer which is dripping with wet 'concrete'.

For the next 3 and a half days we only eat:
Lettuce
Paper
Monopoly Pieces. ( I get to eat the shoe)

for the first day you will dress only as a rabbit.
for the second day it will be necessary for you to character act the role of the kid in 'the sixth sense'
for the third day we dress as civil war soldiers
and the last half of the final day we wander around town, nude.


Sound good? If so send me pics!


HIS RESPONSE:

you do realize that i'm a guy.


MY RESPONSE:

...Sure, but I thought my Moped would make up for it...

HIS RESPONSE:

ha, sorry but i'm straight.

MY RESPONSE:

I am too! Didn't you read my entire email?

HIS RESPONSE:

I'm a guy and as far as i'm concerned, you're a guy too. Gay sex just isnt my thing so i wouldn't be chilling with you like that with your junk taped between your legs.
Dont get me wrong, i have 2 gay friends so i'm not hating.

MY RESPONSE:

I'm not a guy on Saturday nights. Sunday thru Friday we can hang out and do guy stuff, such as Hunt, Fish and watch sports. Saturday nights we can get together and you can fuck my butt-pussy. I douche it with chanel no.9 which I think you will find quite pleasant, although it might remind you of your grandmother.