So this week had a few slip ups. I knew I would however I am using it as a way to understand where the issues are and correct them. It can sound like a cop out however I am learning why I act the way I do.
The fantasy part comes from low self esteem. For head I never believed I was attractive. I thought women wouldn't like me. I have had a fear of getting close to people. My father was a harsh man, my mum emotionally unavailable and spent her time with my sister. It's like being abandoned. Thank goodness the psych I have is incredibly good. The issues are being dealt with as time goes on. The idea is to address the behaviours and replace the negative with the new behaviours and beliefs. Going cold turkey is useful but I need to address the behaviours at hand.
I'm feeling positive as I am building something new.