adair

I have had enough.

My sister- has problems. They are not her fault at all, so before anyone gets upset with me for being insensative, I'm not trying to be.

My sister is 18 and currently battling Anorexia/Bulimia. Resulting from this, and molestation she suffered in the past, she is also depressed and is on medication for it.

She just recently broke a relationship off with a guy that she had met via the internet, who lived in New York. This guy was the worlds biggest loser. The first night they met in person- she slept with him. My mom decided that my sister- who we shall call Mindy shouldn't see this guy anymore. When my sister begged to have him come visit for a second time, my Mom refused and Mindy then stole $300 from my Mom, took off and visited him- in New York.

So now things are messed up. We found out that she gave him the money to come visit us because he is a no good, freeloading asshole who's own parents are sick of him.

Anyway my problem; my sister has been given some attention over this and that is acceptable, but now it's egnited this need to always be bathing in attention. She's been that way since she was a child.

In everything she does she has two motivations; to either fit in, or to get attention.

She used to purposely get in trouble at home so that my parents would punish her by making her sit on a stool in the kitchen.

She's not a body mod buff, but anything she's ever done, she has admitted- has been done for other people to look at...including a god awful tattoo planned for her neck- which ended up going on her back.

She cut her legs up, and then covered them with black, glittery leg warmers- so that people would ask why she was wearing them.

Does drugs? Yep.
Drinks? Yep.
Promiscuos? Yep.

For me, I'm just sick and tired of my mother calling me up and telling me how my sister has fucked up now because as long as Mindy has attention, she will continue to do everything she can to keep it. Staying in line just long enough for my Mom to think that Mindy is "trying" to get better.

The last straw was on Wednesday.
We both went over to my boyfriends with a small group of people. All of us were planning to spend the night- which we knew would be smushy with only two beds (re: futons) and 6 people spending the night.
So we all go to bed at about 1:00 in the morning after watching a movie and going to Tim Hortons (because some people had the munchies).

Anyway the entire night Mindy had been talking to Jeff. Jeff is a friend of hers and both of them liked one another before she started dating that idiot from the internet.

So it comes time for everyone to go to bed. So my friends, Luke, Tony and Lisa get in one bed, and then my boyfriend, myself, Mindy and Jeff cram onto the other.

The lights go out- and my sister starts to make out with Jeff- less than a week after breaking up with New York loser. Oh might I add, she's making out with this guy- loud enough for everyone to hear, IN THE SAME BED AS ME.

Now, my boyfriend and I have had the common courtesy not to do anything at all, and here she is doing this.

Of course I asked her and Jeff (who are lying, heads at the opposite end of the bed) to cut it out. Politely first. Then rudely, then really rudely. Then by throwing a pill bottle at the two of them. Then by kicking Minday- hard.

Finally my boyfriend and I decide to kick one of the two off the bed- by taking up as much room as we possibly can. Jeff ends up on the floor.

This all happens over a period of oh say, a few hours!

The thought had crossed my mind to call my Mom and tell her to come get her slutty daughter, but by the time I got that fed up it was too late.

So I decided that since my sister acted like a slut, and refused to cut out her appalling behaviour- she wouldn't be ashamed of it.

So when my mom asked me how my night went, I said crappy. When she asked why I said: "I got not sleep". When she yet again asked why I answered "Because your other daughter was making out with Jeff, in the same bed as me."

I can't stress how disgusted I am.

I have always been a firm believer that women should be confident with themselves and their sexuality. If you want to have sex or do other things in public go ahead (and good luck)- but don't make your sister a witness.

My sister then of course told my Mom that she hadn't wanted to make out with Jeff and didn't know what to say to him to make him stop.

I gave her every opportunity to stop and blame it on her "lame" older sister. So if she had been in a situation she was uncomfortable with, she could have gotten out of it by blaming me.

What I can't understand was that, even if she had been enjoying herself, why she didn't have the respect for me, my boyfriend, everyone else in the room, and herself, to stop and resume in a more private place at another time.

Instead she went to my mom saying she felt so bad about what she did- and my mom "explained" to me that Mindy did this because she is "confused". That people who have been sexually abused do this. I know, I had to write a thesis paper on this and talk to people who had been abused.

People go through periods of being promiscuious and abstaining. It's natural. What I don't understand is why, when given a clear out by somebody there, she wouldn't have taken it if she was feeling so "confused"?

I haven't talked to her since the incident, other than small talk, and I don't plan to talk to her for awhile because I will lose it on her because I don't believe her bullshit.

I told my Mom that I refuse to listen to her rant about what my sister has done now anymore. She in turn suggested that I am feeling "neglected" and need more attention. I'm 21- don't you think I am beyond that phase? She also suggested I go to see the counsellor Mindy is seeing to fully understand the extent of Mindy's problems.

I get that she has problems, and where certain behaviours come from, but I also get that she's just acting like a slut right now.

Call me harsh. I don't really care- in fact I am sick and tired of trying to care.