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abjectdragoon

Tampa, FL

Member Since 2011

Followers 10 Following 14

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Saturday Jan 28, 2012

Jan 28, 2012
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I recently had a long conversation with several of my friends which all seem to have run in the same vein. Since I will be leaving the country again for my job, the question of "why would you do that?" Tends to crop up a lot, as to why I would go an put myself back in harms way, when I should just sit here at home, work a job, and go to school. If theres one thing that can be said about the experience that was joining the Marines, or now another Government Agency, its that my friends back home wont understand a damn bit of it. For every life-altering experience I may have, good and bad, my friends back home will largely be the same way they were when I left them. My friends will be doing the same thingsgoing to school, not going to school, working, etc., while Ill be barraged with culture shock and do things that none of them will probably ever have to worry about.

Ill meet new people, see new thingsnew worlds even; and they wont even begin to understand it. Going home was never the same again, and being home for too long finds me in the precarious position of wishing I was gone again. The very idea of home became a distant memory, because its never the same as it was. Its not that home has changed, in fact its remained largely the same. Sure, maybe some new stores or restaurants popped up while I was gone, but its hardly any different.

Whats really changed is me and Ill never be the same again. But hey, thats okay. Regular people live regular lives, and Ive lived anything but. Whats really important is that I try your best not to alienate everyone at home, and if I need help with it, dont be afraid to seek it. My friends and family will never understand, but they can try if I give them a chance. This is something I espouse to everyone, who has been through the same thing no matter what service, or which war you fought in.

Don't get me wrong, home, and my family are always on my mind when I am away. But there is something about being somewhere new, seeing something different, and feeling alive again that keeps me going out the door. While it has cost me friends, and in two cases the women I loved I hope that it never changes. I would rather be out there then be bored to death back here, now if someone wants to come me with on those adventures she is more then welcome, but never try to run my life, because I won't run yours.

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