abadseed

well, that was in interesting week... i went to massachusetts, and upon my return, my grandma (nana) went to the hospital. she has something wrong with her inner ear, caused by a virus, that is going to take 6-8 weeks to get over. when the first spell hit, she fell down, then couldn't move without vomiting, due to extreme dizziness. I think that may be my personal hell. i fucking hate being nauseous like that. so, now, someone will have to stay with her 24 hours a day until this thing is cleared up, and she won't really be able to leave her house. this is going to be sooooo hard for her. she is 82 years old, but earlier this year went on a zip line in southern ohio, took a walking tour of italy last year, goes to the pool every day, goes to buddhist retreats, does yoga, and has more of a social life than i do. i feel so bad for her. i will be spending a lot of time at her house in the coming weeks.
this is especially difficult because she dubbed me the "man in [her] life," after my grandpa (papa) died, and my dad hasn't stepped to the plate. i guess i feel especially bad because i wasn't there when the first spell happened. i went to the hospital when i got back, but i can't help but think of all the what ifs.
onward and upward. everything will be ok.