how do you convince someone not to get married?
i just spent the past few hours with an old friend of mine who i havent seen in more than a year. he has a kid now (which he refers to as "the kid") who is 8 months old. he did not want the baby, and neither did his (now) fiance. they had agreed that she would get an abortion. then, her parents convinced her to keep it, without involving him in the conversation. it was obvious to me that he has no desire to be a father right now, which i totally get. but, he is committed and will do all he can for the child. what he does not need to do, imo, is marry this girl. he said that if he could do it over, he wouldnt even be with her, and that the only reason he is marrying her is because of what his mom will think. fuck that. take care of your child, but do not ruin your life, the child's life, and this girl's life by marrying her when you dont love her! i seriously hope he listens to me on this. i feel bad for him. i thank god/whatever every day that im not a father. i can hardly dress and feed myself!
i just spent the past few hours with an old friend of mine who i havent seen in more than a year. he has a kid now (which he refers to as "the kid") who is 8 months old. he did not want the baby, and neither did his (now) fiance. they had agreed that she would get an abortion. then, her parents convinced her to keep it, without involving him in the conversation. it was obvious to me that he has no desire to be a father right now, which i totally get. but, he is committed and will do all he can for the child. what he does not need to do, imo, is marry this girl. he said that if he could do it over, he wouldnt even be with her, and that the only reason he is marrying her is because of what his mom will think. fuck that. take care of your child, but do not ruin your life, the child's life, and this girl's life by marrying her when you dont love her! i seriously hope he listens to me on this. i feel bad for him. i thank god/whatever every day that im not a father. i can hardly dress and feed myself!
Getting married for the wrong reasons can lead to some pretty shitty consequences. My thoughts are with your friend, I hope they get things settled.
after they had/her parents had made them decide to keep the baby, neither of them would have been able to give it up for adoption. i think things with the baby will be ok, as long as they don't get married, as awful as that sounds.