nolan_void

Reading your words is like a religion to me. It makes me feel lighter inside.

[Edited on Nov 01, 2005 10:29AM]

I would like to believe that I am a part of something, a positive force that achieves a greater good, but I have never felt like I was a part of anything at all, let alone something positve.
I am terminally disconnected. My mind operates on a different frequency. My soul, a different resonance. My only strength comes from the same dissonance that rattles my psyche to pieces. I had felt that the only way to find meaning in my life was to help others, lately I've been seeing how meaningless even that once seemingly grand goal is. Faced with a youth culture that obsesses with the shallow and the vacuous I feel that it already too late to do anything good for them. I'm banging my thick skull against a slate chalkboard when dealing with a cross section of individuals who have no notion of human respect, kindness or dignity. How can one man compete against a whole culture of destruction, lies and degradation? How can even a legion of men, when the populace is so strongly conditioned by the glass teat and the effects of a one-sided class war?

Those that subvert the wonder and joy for profit are numerous and powerful. They have guile, and are without morality. I have not given in to misery, but my rage grows Sadly as my anger rises, my hope ebbs. Lately, all that I can reasonably hope for is that the Mayan Calender is correct, that this age of man will soon end, and with it, this shameful, misshapen dead thing that society has become...

edited because I don't want to be a cynic.


To be alive is good...

[Edited on Oct 30, 2005 8:10PM]

The Adversary
The Satan
I like Lucifer
"The Shining One"

Rebellion as the foundation of America?
Political Heresy, my friend.
History is being re-written to support a foundation that eschews rebellion for security.

Haven't you heard?
America was founded by wealthy men -
business men who wanted to protect their right to amass ungodly amounts of wealth.
The new American way.



The embodiment of darkness and despair and suffering?

The embodiment of change I say.
Like the serpents I decorate my skin with,
transition. Growth.
Acquisition of knowledge,
that which is power.

For some, power equals control,
and that is why those in power are adverse to
allowing knowledge into the hands of others.
They "demonize" change
turn the "shining one"
the illuminated
into something
to fear.

Do you think the change of seasons has anything to do with the transitional unsettling way you feel?

Edited to say, thanks for the idea for the costume. I am taking this seriously. Last time I dressed up, I was a dead bridesmaid. Good use of a bad dress, but nobody got it.

[Edited on Oct 17, 2005 8:15PM]

Ha, this is me most of the time, I swear it could be my own personal govt. warning label. I want to use this but it just wouldn't be right, although you should consider copyrighting it, then maybe I could.... hmmm...

"Sometimes I want to respond to the things you say, but lack the content of mind to articulate anything. When I am alone, it seems as if my mind has plenty of things to say, yet when the opportunity presents itself to participate in meaningful discourse, it sometimes leaves me high and dry. Your contact, nonetheless, is greatly appreciated."

I think mostly when I'm alone and far away from my computer, about posts, weird, maybe. oh well.

I'll take the optimist's stance and say that it is a matter of finding the right girl.

And did you see what Bizarro did? That's fucked up. It seems so out of character...

Bizarro land is a strange place indeed.

Now I know where the rap kids got the ideas for the big necklaces.

Damn....

Sorry..

I had to read back a few, catch up if you will. I have to comment of the four hours of titties. How hilarious, and true.

yeah, doing anything for four and a half hours straight takes some thought cuz it is a pretty big commitment, even if it's rubbing your face in titties.

And yeah, Deadpool's a pretty deep and somber person when you get to know him. He likes the Danny Elfman alright. and he's really into Barbara Streisand. There are many facets and shades to the unapologetic, cold-blooded killer, Deadpool. He also likes the kitties & puppies.

Sometimes people cry at my desk and hug me when they leave. My coworkers joke that I sell cars to "family members". It pisses me off but I have interactions with people and it means something to me. Who knows if it will actually pay down the road, maybe it will save my soul or balance it out being in this business and all. I go in my head so much I hear "blonde" and "from Neptune" but I'm just trying to absorb everyone at once not just my own perspective, let alone do my. Whatever Not like any other job I've ever had and every day/person/deal is different. Very odd.

Where do you think you can find these interactions that you so need? Kinda like Kids eating chalk and dirt because they are vitamin deficient. You will get what you need eventually but can you visualize an environment now?

That's the only book I know, which somehow, is not nearly as good as the movie.

Most of those people have nothing going on behind their shrouds that is worth peeking at.
It's so odd what our mind manufactures when it is missing something.

I love alliteration. Spontaneous Assonance also.