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Aims for 2007 -


1. Write a novel

2. Help my best friend in the whole world bring her baby into being

3. Eat a fuckload of amazing food

4. Convert Simon Amstell to heterosexuality so he'll marry me and make me with child. WHY O WHY DOES HE PREFER SHAGGING MEN TO CHASING LADYTAIL I ASK YOU.


*cries*




And a festive annual greeting to...
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VIEW 10 of 10 COMMENTS
shottphotos:
How did you go with your new years resolutions?
sunday_love:
hey fellow melbournite ...
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Completely cactus* after an enormous Boxing Day and needing to run away to the country for NYE. Fuck standing around in St.Kilda waiting aimlessly for a taxi; I'm heading to a 50's cottage for a private food and wine festival. Hopefully someone will kiss me.



2006 is nearly over. For this I am pleased.





*this is an Australian expression which you may...
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rdt1025:
I would kiss you
Happy Boxing Day
kiss kiss kiss kiss
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What I would like for Christmas:

- new digital camera
- i-pod (mini, I'm not picky. Mine is behaving very erratically)
- all-expenses paid trip to Vietnam
- dinner with Martin Amis
- new knickers
- endless amounts of tongue-kissing.


What I will get for Christmas:

- novelty straws shaped like penises
- a 'beer bong'
- soap
- cheese
- bottle of Scotch.




All in all not a bad result, really.
christina:
i used to work for martin amis.
so i may be able to sort out gift no.4 for you one day.
princkly:
Malone said:

...What I will get for Christmas:
- novelty straws shaped like penises
- a 'beer bong'
- soap
- cheese
- bottle of Scotch.

Sounds like you're going to do better than me. Sorry, no sympathy on this one. And as for the first item I will personally be providing to my guest a penis shaped like a novelty straw. Ah well, I suppose I can always make the comment to her: "Sure it looks like a straw. Think of it like a straw if you want. You know what to do with a straw don't ya?"

Comment on What Are You Doing for Christmas thread

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Why have I accepted so much work just before Christmas? I'll be taking five days off over New Years to have a private food and wine festival in the hills, hopefully with some requisite skinny-dipping. BUT I HAVE TO TAKE MY COMPUTER WITH ME.



I really didn't think this through at all, did I?




And so the Melbourne summer swelters...
VIEW 4 of 4 COMMENTS
princkly:
It's called a guilt bag. A lot of people with a heavy schedule carry them round with them. Guilt bags typically contain a laptop computer, files, reports to be read, outlines of articles that must be written etc.
Once you have packed you Guilt Bag with all the things you must do you feel better; because you have demonstrated your unswerving intention.
The other thing about Guilt Bags is that they rarely get opened. Although they do see a lot of places as they get carted around everywhere.
I wonder if yours will get opened. I note that you have already listed your priorities: Friends, skinny-dipping, food, wine. Good for you. If I were you I would attend to those first.

Do you ever wish you were a fitter and turner? I mean; you can hardly carry your lathe round with you.
scheisskopf:
Oh yeah, it's summer down there. EL SUICIDO LOCO
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Last night I had to attend a literary speed dating night at the State Library, the premise being that you brought your favourite novel with you and would bond with a member of the opposite sex over your love of fine literature. No I am not desperate, I am writing an article about it and was 'undercover' DON'T JUDGE ME.


Anyway. It was just...
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VIEW 7 of 7 COMMENTS
soobie:
The idea of bringing along a book to a date is ... different?

I wonder, did anyone bring along something they have read many many times and can practically quote? Or did people bring along books they thought would be ... ummm ...attractive? (Can't think of a better word than attractive.)

A couple of my friends have been dragged along to speed dating nights - I think the word 'long' appeared in their descriptions too. Which seems ironic.
christina:
totally.
for sure.
of course.
oh yeah.
xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
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oh dear. THREE MONTHS without posting a blog; surely baby jesus is crying somewhere. I have been doing some travelling and am of course hugely apologetic for letting my SG account slide. My intentions have been entirely honourable (if a little dishevelled). I promise I won't let it happen again.


Are we still friends?



In other news, the Russian Roulettes are starting a December...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
miamaze:
Sure am sweet thang! Damn I wish I could come have a beer at the tote, Im homesick.
princkly:
Are we still friends?
I wish! Hey, I thought we were friends: My only option is to "end friendship" - which I would not want to do - but when I look at your friends list I'm not on there. Conversely you're not on my friends list. Buggered if I can figure that out.
Anyway. Lets be friends. We should be. Read my shameless blog. My hobby matches your About Malone statement.
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Back in town, albeit briefly...this site feels like a world away. Heading off to Sydney tomorrow for work. Am also on the judging table for Friday night's Burlesque Battle Royale 2 at the Spanish Club, so if you're in the neighbourhood drop by and pinch me on the bottom.



I have absolutely no idea why they've asked me to be a...
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VIEW 6 of 6 COMMENTS
julianbleach:
Just a quick hello! Yes i sometimes wish i was asked more than to judge how well a bum's right hook can be executed in a drunken alley fight
fanny:
You? Were that chick who interviewed me for the radio station right??? confused
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I am currently on my national tour...3 days in Sydney, a night in Brisvegas and at the obscene time of Saturday 7am I head to Darwin for two weeks. Will do my best to update from the Northern Territory but I may instead be busy wrestling crocodiles with my bare hands/living in a campervan with my parents*.


During this time I will have...
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thefuckoffkid:
How's it all going so far?
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Finally, reaching out of the internerd and into real life...


Had a fucking sweet time on Saturday night meeting various Aus SG's. Pizza, liquor, Hell City Glamours, general ladybonding...ending with 2am hot chocolates and peking duck* at the high-falutin' Supper Club.

Many high-speed OMFG-type conversations, salacious tale-swapping, grand plans for multigirl sets - it was so lovely to be squeezing arms with such an...
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thefuckoffkid:
Well, by golly...!
lelaina:
biggrin
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Just found out my ex reads this. So I'm self-censoring. Looks like I'll have to find some other secret blog out there to express the deep dark secrets.


Either that or I could just write in my fucking diary like a normal person.
VIEW 5 of 5 COMMENTS
girlfrompasadena:
hello malone smile
you seem like a wonderfully sweet melbourne girl and i can't wait for your set to go live.
as far as your ex and blog-reading - fuck him. do you really give a toss what he thinks any more? your other entries show off a sassy and confident attitude, don't let that fade over this.
take care of you xox
cleverthings:
Just change it so that it only broadcasts to those on your friends list when it's something very private... that's what I will be doing now that there's that option.

Self-censoring is SHIT.
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Saturday night I wore my pink SG underwear out for the first time - to see Legends of Motorsport at the Northcote Social Club.


I was wearing something short, so I'm kind of hoping that people bothered to look up my dress. It's not often you encourage that kind of thing, but special underwear seems to rate high on the 'share it with the...
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alibi:
Looking forward to your set!
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May I point out at this juncture that it is FUCKING AWFUL having an ex who writes a blog.


I don't want to know about the new excitements or lemon tartlets. I don't want to hear about his stomachy thrills or new lease of life. I SIMPLY DO NOT WANT TO KNOW.



I mean, for fuck's. As Nanushka* once said:

The lover...
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VIEW 3 of 3 COMMENTS
miamaze:
you just gotta be strong and not read it. tahts the only thing you can do suga. but thank god thats never happened to me! i dont think i have it in me not to look.
isi:
you dont have to read the stuff, if it hurts you soooo much, big hug kiss