elise

it was great to be home, although the town sucks balls. i love my family at times, i really do. this was one of those times. and my dog...he wouldn't get up off my coat to let me go back. it was heartbreaking.

digdug sent me some AWFULLY CUTE pictures...but i can't show you. unless thirtyseven lets me

i really love this time of year....
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I finally got my voice back.

I am really looking forward to Thanksgiving this year. We are going to have TONS of vegetarian dishes. I will be so pleasantly stuffed

What are you thankful for?

I am walking down a red plush carpet again.
I smell holy water. I question it. Always was the little skeptic.
My grandmother makes me bow, cross myself,
my little ivory hands grudgingly make their way
from my chest to my forehead and back.
And enter
the pew.
Organs blaring guilt-music. All gather together to worship
the priest.
The priest in green robes,
bald shiny...
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random realizations:

my cat likes to sit on paper.

microfiber is the softest most comfortable little miracle in the world.

i'm about to watch the first Harry Potter for the first time.

I am off to make veggie tomato basil pizza burgers.

kellie is cute.

tatum seems to have found herself a MAN! who saw that coming? *wink*

still can't utter a word.

i like...
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what a weekend it was, dear friends.

Elise has been inexcusably sick since Friday night. Watch out, because this thing is going around. I'm talking fever, stuffy/runny nose, unheard-of sinus pressure, sore throat, coughing, and it was even painful to BREATHE for a while there.

needless to say, all i did all weekend was sleep and eat cream of wheat.

until sunday night, which was...
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wow. digdug is a cutie for sure! talk about a great smile!! i hate hate hate my job for not letting me hang out with thirtyseven and digdug all day. but at least i'm fortunate enough to have hung out with them for a little while, even if it was at work. and boy are they fun to hug. and freakin' ADORABLE! (just in case...
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"Only a Test"

Last night I dreamt of ghosts and schoolbuses
and one of my mice died.
We are going to sit down and write it together:

With every year you age a day.

I woke up early.
This isnt what its supposed to be.

Its not a good time to go mad.

I check the moon cycle,
maybe I have some kind of disorder....
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The phone rang.
Once.
I listened through the vents
As my father picked it up in
The bathroom in
The room he shared
With my mother.
His voice so soft, barely
Above a whisper.
So hushed, my small ear
Had to strain to listen.
He was talking to a woman.
but hes a good father.
The woman isnt my mother.
but hes a good father....
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I had tons of fun yesterday with a good friend i haven't seen in around four months. lots of driving, some slippery scary rain at night, but it was all worth it. i haven't laughed that hard in a looong time

thanks, B!

other than that (or because of that), I am increasingly happier. It's like finally a hole was poked in that ever-increasing black...
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I haven't been so happy with my life in a long time. Last night, lying down in my warm jersey-knit sheets, i felt all my muscles finally relax. i felt all the tension finally leave my body and mind. and at last, there was calmness! calmness! no worry, no tension, no anxiety, no negativity... it was all something i hadn't felt in what seems like...
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There needs to be a Spongebob Squarepants Channel. Certain lonely times of the night, or certain sad, gloomy, cold times of the day, I need Spongebob to lift me up and remind me to not take life so seriously. He needs to be made available to me 24/7. Someone get on this.

yay for yummy baby food

i want to thank thirtyseven for her wonderful suggestions. Tutti Frutti is the best!

Random Thoughts:

I'm cold and yet warm. are my hormones fighting?

I'm doing pretty damn well in my math class if i do say so myself. that is rare for me. so i'm happy

i'm thirsty. and i have a sore throat.

i'm at the hotel...
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