citrus

back and forth
up and down
around and around

weeeeeee !






so, like,
i was looking for something,
and i kept telling myself, okay citrus, just wait a few minutes, work on something else, and come back to that...
and then i'd finish something up and go back to looking for it... and i'd get frustrated so i'd go guzzle a glass of water (speaking...
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music like heartbreak

sometimes we stay awake so tomorrow never comes.

now: it is the most humbling, perfect moment.


:insert sigh:
i read somewhere that a sigh is for those who suffer silently,
because there are no words to suit.


a coworker brought me this huge cucumber today from his neighbor's garden.
now, i like cucumbers, and usually i pick them kindof small because it's...
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i think i'll go see a movie or something after therapy tonight


although, i DOOO have lots else i could be doing.


update kopper style
~-~-~-~-~-~

i just turned in my notice.
my c.f.o. says that she thinks it's super exciting and that she's proud of me for taking the opportunity and that she loves me and to keep in touch

i was shaking.
and...
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it's rained so long that i've grown somewhat accustomed to it.
did it rain yesterday? i don't know, but i would probably answer "yes" if i wanted to base it on pattern.
it suits my mood, though - the rain.

my grandmother calls and i confuse the time difference...
there is none, but i'm already thinking an hour ahead.

mom sent me emails yesterday wondering...
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are we ready for the melancholy?
i really am.

let's have some aimee mann:

it's not
what you thought
when you first began it

you got
what you want
now you can hardly stand it
though,

by now you know
it's not going to stop
it's not going to stop
it's not going to stop
'til you wise up

you're sure
there's a cure
and...
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ya know what...(?)

nevermind.



so that's that.

twenty-one days
i LOVE that number



i officially have a date for next thursday.
i'm excited for several reasons: i love to sit on the floor, i love to eat with my hands, i love middle-eastern food (is ethiopian considered at all middle-eastern?)
should be fun. and i suppose that's what this is all about, right?
i shouldn't...
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smiling.

quiet thoughts i keep to myself but feel like shouting.
this is part of what it's about.

so many illustrations in the live film we scramble and flow as best we can to keep up with.

overwhelming in the moment, so we let it go.

the answer is, "i don't know"

i write something
and then i nix it

something else i'd like to mentally/tangibly note to myself...
and it's obsolete by the time i get it down

i listen to song lyrics and i pour out like the rain from clouds for days and days,
and, like this odd weather texas sees, i'm dry again by eventide

more than one girlfriend supposes i should be...
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if you love cupofkarma, as i most definitely do,
keep your friday open. we must bid her proper adieu.
she's going to be leaving this weekend for the dominican republic.
woman's gonna come back tanned and relaxed with goodies! it's exciting.
(and i bet she's gonna wanna hop all over her hunny!)

i'm begging for coffee to be forwarded to the address i'll have...
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it's very interesting.

i was angry for a few minutes,
and then i identified directly with the fear and sadness, which has been residual and under the surface for days and days, leeched out yesterday morning by memories...
and then i didn't want anything to do with either in regards to where i'm going... these very days will be merely memories before long.

allison says...
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there's lots i could go on about,
but it doesn't make any difference.

i'll write it down somewhere -
it comes much slower that way



i feel lucky.
i have lots of work to do.
i'm angry that i'm vulnerable,
but so much love.
goodness.
flash.



five to the power of two




it's amazing how a person's life can change so dramatically in just a...
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