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In turned out that me avoiding my family over Christmas was a smart move as they were all paralysed by food poisoning. New years eve was interesting I managed to get to Brixton from West London in two hours by night bus. The thing itself was well, it was just people out of their skulls. I got some really nice presents including Black Books wich...
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There were some films a while ago that I seemed to watch again and again they were - Where eagles Dare, the trotters to hull and back, whithnail and I and get carter. I don't know why but I loved them. I don't what people will think of this but I have always been strangely attracted to Linsey Lohan (even when she was younger). She...
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There's not much left out of a roast chicken.

My heads starting to swim a bit. One of tdescription of literature in a dictionaryhe first +ve images I had of smoking was when I was at school seeing a picture of Dylan Thomas sidelong with a fag in his mouth. The americans killed him of course. It was in a compendium of literature in a dictionary. I loved the look and wanted to be...
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It is amazing how many associations you have with a fag - I am reading a book by Jon Ronson and normally whenever I read a book I have fag every chapter, also sitting by the fire I have a fag, I am dreading tomorrow as it will kick in then, dreading falling asleep as when I wake up I will want fag. You almost...
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I am feeling a bit high now it's probably cos its getting to dusk here.

I am getting a headache, I know what follows this is insomnia followed by functional impotence. I tell you who I do really really hate is badly drawn boy.

Right now I am wanting a cigarette - badly.

A typical christmas in our household is given over to my father alcoholism and my mothers hysteria and my sister compulsion to clean everything. My sister is the classic chosen child in an alcoloholic family - responsible and conscientious. Only she isn't she is deeply ungenerous, it turns all her boyfriends away from her. She has my mothers desire to dominate. Classic enabling. Her flat...
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I realise that nobody is reading this and nobody gives a shit - so I think I shall describe my nth time to try and give up smoking. What I have read and this is born out by personal experience is the about the first 3 days are pure bloody hell, then you have about 3 weeks of feeling like total shit. Then about 3...
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See the thing is I was drinking so much and doing other stuff the palms of my hands started to itch. Never good. Also I was overweight and had a grey look about me. Too many depressants. The old liver has had time to recover and I still smoke like a chimney so who am I tryng to kid?

I know I am going to deeply regret saying this but I have been sober for about 4 years now and it is actually pretty boring. I have lost a huge amount of weight though but basically acted as almost as big an arsehole as when I was a drunkard. I miss going and getting mullered with my friends. I like the taste - basically...
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