Man oh man, im still sick. This is not cool, not at all.
Ok, this has been on my mind for a while and i was wondering what others thought. So my ex dumped me, well said she wanted to spend time apart, back in the beginning of january. So its been a little while and of course for about the first couple of months i was a wreck and acting pitifully, like Mikey from Swingers, i couldnt not talk to people about her, i couldnt not think about her, i couldnt not want to call her. All i would think about was how she was hangin out with her new friends from work, goin to dive bars with them almost every night, her not giving a shit about anything but hangin out with these people. I realize that she has never had a real group of friend s to hang out with since her high school days and this is partly the reason she wanted "time not in a relationship" and thats cool, and i realize she is at that point in her life where she will either decide to go on to more "higher education" or figure out what the hell she wants to do with her life (im trying not to sound like a career guidance counciler) and thats cool too, its a lot on the mind. Anyways, this whole time she pretty much did a 180 and went from treating me with much love to some guy she knows and sometimes has short conversations with ( which i told her about in a conversation somewhat recently and she said at times she felt like she "had" to treat me bad, i guess to "not send me the wrong message" who knows) pretty much treating me crappy magnified by the amount of goodness i was pouring onto her, not in some crazy way just tryin got be there, taking her out a few times, really doing as much as possible for her without being creepy but probably walking a fine line. Anyways that was really the backstory. Now she calls me everyday, even if only to say hello, we hang out like four or five days out of the week, seeing a movie, goin to dinner, whatever. She has seemed to become much nicer towards me actually saying more than a few words at a time, making an effort to call me and so on. She has given up goin out every night, drinking every night, actually seeming interested when i ask if she wants to hang out, a somewhat large turn from the beginning of our "break". Now i dont exactly know what to think. Does it seem like she is coming around, possibly wanting to get back with me? Or what? She knows i dont want to "just be friends" that if she is gonna start going out with other dudes im cutting it off. SHe has said im the only guy she cares about but that she just needs time, time im willing to give (not that im in control or anything) but shes always vague when it comes to "yes im gonna get back together with you" crap, which is normal, no one wants to promise anything they dont know is gonna happen. Last night we went and watched a movie and when i dropped her off i (gush gush) told her i still love her, which i havent said in a while since i thought it was becoming overdone, and she actually smiled and gave me another hug, when in the past she would just say "thanks" or something weird like that. SOooo, i was just thinking, where the hell is this going?
well ive typed too much boring crap so if any of this makes sense, which im sure will take a lot of deciphering to figure out, tell me what you think.
Love, Me
Ok, this has been on my mind for a while and i was wondering what others thought. So my ex dumped me, well said she wanted to spend time apart, back in the beginning of january. So its been a little while and of course for about the first couple of months i was a wreck and acting pitifully, like Mikey from Swingers, i couldnt not talk to people about her, i couldnt not think about her, i couldnt not want to call her. All i would think about was how she was hangin out with her new friends from work, goin to dive bars with them almost every night, her not giving a shit about anything but hangin out with these people. I realize that she has never had a real group of friend s to hang out with since her high school days and this is partly the reason she wanted "time not in a relationship" and thats cool, and i realize she is at that point in her life where she will either decide to go on to more "higher education" or figure out what the hell she wants to do with her life (im trying not to sound like a career guidance counciler) and thats cool too, its a lot on the mind. Anyways, this whole time she pretty much did a 180 and went from treating me with much love to some guy she knows and sometimes has short conversations with ( which i told her about in a conversation somewhat recently and she said at times she felt like she "had" to treat me bad, i guess to "not send me the wrong message" who knows) pretty much treating me crappy magnified by the amount of goodness i was pouring onto her, not in some crazy way just tryin got be there, taking her out a few times, really doing as much as possible for her without being creepy but probably walking a fine line. Anyways that was really the backstory. Now she calls me everyday, even if only to say hello, we hang out like four or five days out of the week, seeing a movie, goin to dinner, whatever. She has seemed to become much nicer towards me actually saying more than a few words at a time, making an effort to call me and so on. She has given up goin out every night, drinking every night, actually seeming interested when i ask if she wants to hang out, a somewhat large turn from the beginning of our "break". Now i dont exactly know what to think. Does it seem like she is coming around, possibly wanting to get back with me? Or what? She knows i dont want to "just be friends" that if she is gonna start going out with other dudes im cutting it off. SHe has said im the only guy she cares about but that she just needs time, time im willing to give (not that im in control or anything) but shes always vague when it comes to "yes im gonna get back together with you" crap, which is normal, no one wants to promise anything they dont know is gonna happen. Last night we went and watched a movie and when i dropped her off i (gush gush) told her i still love her, which i havent said in a while since i thought it was becoming overdone, and she actually smiled and gave me another hug, when in the past she would just say "thanks" or something weird like that. SOooo, i was just thinking, where the hell is this going?
well ive typed too much boring crap so if any of this makes sense, which im sure will take a lot of deciphering to figure out, tell me what you think.
Love, Me
commonman:
It's impossible to say where any relationship is going, even when you're in it for a long time. Circumstances always change, and so do people. But, it sounds like she hasn't made up her mind about you yet. Why? Who knows. It sounds like she needs time, and you just have to ride out her indecision. If you're a game player, you could start dating other women and see how she reacts, but games were never my forte.
3am:
That's interesting. I wonder what she is thinking? Waiting it out does sound frustrating, but I don't think there is a choice. It's tough when you really love the person.