...two cannibals are eating a clown, one says to the other "DOES THIS TASTE FUNNY TO YOU!? O____o"

lyxzen:
Classic!!
dezzmalone:
Hahaha I was watching an "anti joke" video and totally remembered you, I pulled that one from it xD

From benchwmr

This is the best video of Cresswell doing Arrhythmic Palpitations, IMO. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QotGJjFmo1I

From hex

Hey Lyxzen! I am interested in doing the concert flyering again, and I respoded to Sydneys email but haven't heard back. Any news? 

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hex:
I still didn't get anything back, perhaps my email never sent. If she could send another that'd be great! <3 
lyxzen:
She's sending now! Make sure you add modelassist@suicidegirls.com to your email's address book so it doesn't go to spam or anything like that! :) 

From myzaree

I think we need to take a road trip and do this kittens and cafe thing!!! https://www.yahoo.com/travel/what-its-really-like-to-work-in-a-cat-cafe-126279858062.html

lyxzen:
YESSSS! That looks so amazing!!!
myzaree:
Someone needs to bring this idea to LA stat!!!

From thunderr

Hi <3 Do you come to Chile? say yes please <3

lyxzen:
Unfortunately they need me here in the office, so I won't be there. But lots of other amazing ladies will be there! :)
thunderr:
That's is sad! I hope someday you'll come! I'll send u a lot of love with the burlesque girls <3

Just joined the site, but wanted to say I really enjoyed meeting you at the Geekology signing!

lyxzen:
Oh hiiii! Welcome to the site!! I think you'll love it here, but now you've got lots of photos, videos, and groups to catch up on, haha! ;)
cloudninja:
joining was definitely one of the best decisions I've ever made. 

From wizard0

You are in luck!  I just found an old joke book that I've had for 40 years!  YOU WILL LOVE THIS!!
Why is it so hard to fool a snake?   You can't pull his leg. 
What animal doesn't play fair?  A cheetah. 
What is a cat fur?  Fur making kitten britches.

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wizard0:
What would you call a shortage of beanies?  A cap gap.

What would you call my funny friends hat?  A clown crown. 

What do mallards and mergansers use when they play hockey?  A duck puck.

What do witches carry at the front of their parade?  A hag flag.

What do young sheep like on their toast?  Lamb jam.

What would you call a very heavy metal cot?  A lead bed.

What would you call a manual that teaches you how to catch fish?  A hook book.

What would you call a frog that sends secret messages?  A code toad.

What noise does a dog make at night?  A dark bark.

What kind of arithmatic do you get in the tub?  Bath math.

What do you call the route you follow to get in the tub?  The bath path.

What would you call a large group of feathered animals?  A bird herd.

Where did the Mayflower land with the pilgrims?  A rock dock.

Where would you go to learn to be a vampire?  To ghoul school.
wizard0:
David:  y brother's job as a trimmer in a candle factory keeps him busy every saturday and sunday.
George:  Doesn't he work during the week?
David:  Oh no, just on wick ends.

"Willie", said his mother, "will you please run across the street and see how old Mrs. Trotter is this morning?"
"Sure," replied Willie, and he dashed off on his mission.  "Mom," he announced, "Mrs. Trotter says it's none of your business how old she is."

Why does your brother sleep in a chandelier?  Because he's a light sleeper.

A furrie tried to invent a new fur by crossing a mink with a gorilla.  It didn't work though-the sleeves were too long.

Did you hear about the mad scientist who crossed a carrier pigeon with a woodpecker?  When the pigeon delivers the message, he can also knock on the door.

He also crossed a puppy with a chicken and got pooched eggs.
He also crossed a mink with a kangaroo and got a fur coat with pockets.
He also crossed a turkey with a centipede.  On Thanksgiving, EVERYBODY got a drumstick.
He also crossed a tiger with a watchdog and got a very nervous postman.

Flood-A river that's too big for it's bridges.
Forger-A man who's always ready to write a wrong.
Shopper-Someone who likes to go buy-buy.
Iron Age-The period before permanent press.

What's green and bumpy, smal and very fast?  A sports pickle.

Why is your heart like a policeman?  Because it follows a regular beat.

From payton

Hey lady I am trying to find out how to change the name of my new set that didn't come out yet. I can't seem to figure it out.  Please help.  Thank you 

lyxzen:
Hey girl! Just email modelassist@suicidegirls.com with a link to the set and what you would like the new title to be, and Sydney can change that for you! :)
payton:
Awesome thank you so much 

From wizard0

1. Two antennas met on a roof, fell in love and got married. The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.2. A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything."3. A woman has twins and gives them up for adoption. One of them goes to a family in Egypt and is named "Ahmal." The other goes to a family in Spain; they name him "Juan." Years later, Juan sends a picture of himself to his birth mother. Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Her husband responds, "They're twins! If you've seen Juan, you've seen Ahmal."3. A dyslexic man walks into a bra.5. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says: "A beer please, and one for the road."6. Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?"7. "Doc, I can't stop singing 'The Green, Green Grass of Home.'" "That sounds like Tom Jones Syndrome." "Is it common?" Well, "It's Not Unusual."8. Two cows are standing next to each other in a field. Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," says Dolly. "It's true, no bull!" exclaims Daisy.9. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either.10. Deja Moo: The feeling that you've heard this bull before.11. I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any.12. A man woke up in a hospital after a serious accident. He shouted, doctor, doctor, I can't feel my legs!" The doctor replied, "I know you can't I've cut off your arms!"13. I went to a seafood disco last week... and pulled a mussel.14. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh.15. Two fish swim into a concrete wall. The one turns to the other and says Dam!"16. Two Eskimos sitting in a kayak were chilly, so they lit a fire in the craft. Unsurprisingly it sank, proving once again that you can't have your kayak and heat it too.17. A group of chess enthusiasts checked into a hotel and were standing in the lobby discussing their recent tournament victories. After about an hour, the manager came out of the office and asked them to disperse. "But why," they asked, as they moved off. "Because," he said, "I can't stand chess-nuts boasting in an open foyer."18. Two peanuts walk into a bar, and one was a salted.19. Mahatma Gandhi, as you know, walked barefoot most of the time, which produced an impressive set of calluses on his feet. He also ate very little, which made him rather frail and with his odd diet, he suffered from bad breath. This made him. (Oh, man, this is so bad, it's good...) A super calloused fragile mystic hexed by halitosis.20. And finally, there was the person who sent twenty different puns to his friends, with the hope that at least ten of the puns would make them laugh. No pun in ten did!!!!!!!!

reaper:
YES THANK YOU HUMAN 
lyxzen:
YES! SOOO many good ones, aughhh! 

Hi Lyzxen, how are you? Do you know who the Suicide Girl was who created various products with the neon pizza as one of the designs?... psychedelic looking, I can't remember myself, but i think you will might though?? :-)

lyxzen:
I have no idea, I'm sorry, dear! Sounds awesome, though! - Good luck finding her! :) 
dave11111:
I guess i could always try and scroll back through about six months of posts in my comment history :D, and thank's

I'm just catching up on your Periscope and you are the cuuutessttttt PLUS I am SO jealous about cat con! wtf, not fair. Lil Bubb <3

lyxzen:
Awwww! Thank you, lady!  I'm soooo jazzed for Cat Con! There's gonna be so much cool stuff! Maybe you can come to the US next summer and we can go together!!
gemmaedwardsuk:
I wiissssshhhhh this to be true, I love little Bubbbbb <3 pet them all extra for me :) x

From fresa

It puts a smile on my face when you comment or like my things, thanks for being so lovely!

lyxzen:
Aww, thank YOU for being so lovely!! (Takes one to know one, right?) <3