Asherah: The Wife of God?
by Keith Daniels
The Bible is often presented by believers as a monolithic creation, as if it descended from Heaven whole, perfect, and in King James' English. The truth, as in so many things, is so much more complicated and interesting. The text of the Hebrew Tanakh which became what Christians dismissively call the "Old Testament" began as an oral tradition that was eventually written down in Hebrew and Aramaic by unknown scribes over hundreds of years in what's called "abjad" script - a system of writing in which only the consonants are set down and the reader is intended to fill in the vowels. These individual writings were eventually collected into a generally accepted canon by around 400 BCE and finally codified at a later but unknown date, probably by 100 CE.
And that's just the "Old Testament".
Similarly, the New Testament is a disparate collection of texts from numerous and mostly unknown authors - despite traditional ascriptions - writing from between around 50 to 200 CE. None of the books of the New Testament were written during the lifetime of a historical Jesus. And according to the Catholic Encyclopedia, the popular conception of one singular ancient council of the Church that decided what books were in and what were out is inaccurate:
The idea of a complete and clear-cut canon of the New Testament existing from the beginning, that is from Apostolic times, has no foundation in history. The Canon of the New Testament, like that of the Old, is the result of a development, of a process at once stimulated by disputes with doubters, both within and without the Church, and retarded by certain obscurities and natural hesitations, and which did not reach its final term until the dogmatic definition of the Tridentine Council.
That Tridentine Council didn't happen until 1545, at which point the 27 books we now know as the New Testament were finally confirmed. There are other books, though. Among them are texts which describe teachings of Christ that the modern Christian religion would find awkward to say the least, like the Gospel of Mary, which rejects the traditional depiction of Mary Magdalene as a prostitute, argues for female leadership in the church, and depicts Jesus as a Buddha-like philosopher urging his followers to find salvation in their own minds.
There is a theory that books like the Gospel of Mary were rejected from the New Testament by the male hierarchy of the early church who sought to cement their own dominance. Many of these books were deemed heretical and only existed in the references of their orthodox condemnations until the rediscovery of caches like Nag Hammadhi.
Similarly, the Dead Sea Scrolls demonstrated that the Hebrew Bible in its early incarnations was much more varied before its codification than had been supposed. What if the early Jews or the scholars who translated their writings also omitted any subjects which might have been politically inconvenient? What if, for example, God - Yahweh - once had a wife?
Well, University of Exeter senior Theology and Religion lecturer Francesca Stavrakopoulou believes just that.
"You might know him as Yahweh, Allah or God. But on this fact, Jews, Muslims and Christians, the people of the great Abrahamic religions, are agreed: There is only one of Him," writes Stavrakopoulou in a statement released to the British media. "He is a solitary figure, a single, universal creator, not one God among many...or so we like to believe."
"After years of research specializing in the history and religion of Israel, however, I have come to a colorful and what could seem, to some, uncomfortable conclusion that God had a wife," she added.
Stavrakopoulou bases her theory on ancient texts, amulets and figurines unearthed primarily in the ancient Canaanite coastal city called Ugarit, now modern-day Syria. All of these artifacts reveal that Asherah was a powerful fertility goddess.
Asherah's connection to Yahweh, according to Stavrakopoulou, is spelled out in both the Bible and an 8th century B.C. inscription on pottery found in the Sinai desert at a site called Kuntillet Ajrud.
"The inscription is a petition for a blessing," she shares. "Crucially, the inscription asks for a blessing from 'Yahweh and his Asherah.' Here was evidence that presented Yahweh and Asherah as a divine pair. And now a handful of similar inscriptions have since been found, all of which help to strengthen the case that the God of the Bible once had a wife."
Also significant, Stavrakopoulou believes, "is the Bible's admission that the goddess Asherah was worshiped in Yahweh's Temple in Jerusalem. In the Book of Kings, we're told that a statue of Asherah was housed in the temple and that female temple personnel wove ritual textiles for her."
Stavrakopoulou isn't the first to make this claim, and other religious scholars agree with her. J. Edward Wright, president of both The Arizona Center for Judaic Studies and The Albright Institute for Archaeological Research says:
"Asherah was not entirely edited out of the Bible by its male editors," he added. "Traces of her remain, and based on those traces, archaeological evidence and references to her in texts from nations bordering Israel and Judah, we can reconstruct her role in the religions of the Southern Levant."
Asherah - known across the ancient Near East by various other names, such as Astarte and Istar - was "an important deity, one who was both mighty and nurturing," Wright continued.
"Many English translations prefer to translate 'Asherah' as 'Sacred Tree,'" Wright said. "This seems to be in part driven by a modern desire, clearly inspired by the Biblical narratives, to hide Asherah behind a veil once again."
Hat tip: RichardDawkins.net Happy birthday, Mr. Dawkins!
Microwaved Devil Hand, Anyone?
Desperate times call for desperate measures. And, apparently, really desperate times call for really desperate measures. Especially if you are a certain mid-20's man in Hayden, Idaho.
Really desperate times: the man believed that he bore the sign of Satan.
Really desperate measures: he cut off his own hand using a circular saw and proceeded to cook the emancipated body part in the microwave.
Okay
wait
what?!
Yes, the man seems to have been reading too much of the ol Bible.
The Book of Revelation in the New Testament contains a passage in which an angel is quoted as saying: If anyone worships the beast and his image and receives his mark on the forehead or on the hand, he, too, will drink the wine of Gods fury.
The book of Matthew also contains the passage: And if your right hand causes you to sin, cut it off and throw it away. It is better for you to lose one part of your body than for you whole body to do into hell.
Though authorities at the Kootenai County Department commented on the sadness of the mental illness exhibited by his acts, it is not known whether the man has a history of MI. At this point, we also dont know which hand did the giving and which did the receiving, nor do we know whether the passive hand was later reattached.
We do know, however, that the man had a little bit of sanity or foresight or grounding or whatever you want to call it, as he went to work. For one, he called 911. Furthermore, he put a tourniquet onto his arm to save himself from bleeding to death.
At least he took safety precautions, right, people?! And kudos on the post-modification electromagnetic wave-induced modification. Idaho man for body mod of the year?
Fatalitys hand was also in a microwave once. When her brother tried to cram her baby form into one many years ago
The Bible as Porn? Maybe in Hong Kong
Hearing the word "bible" typically does not conjure images in one's mind of scantily clad individuals romping around or engaging in exciting Jerry Bruckheimer-worthy acts of violence. In fact, for many people the bible tends to evoke images of old men in cheap suits rambling about moral decay, thoughts of shame and guilt, ponderous lists of names and notions of the meek somehow inheriting the earth. However, a group in Hong Kong seems to be in the former camp, and is fighting to get the bible labeled as indecent and obscene. If they are successful no one under the age of 18 will be allowed to purchase a bible, and it will have to be individually wrapped to ensure that it is not accidentally opened.
More than 800 Hong Kong residents have called on authorities to reclassify the Bible as "indecent" due to its sexual and violent content, following an uproar over a sex column in a university student journal.
A spokesperson for Hong Kong's Television and Entertainment Licensing authority (TELA) said it had received 838 complaints about the Bible by noon Wednesday.
The complaints follow the launch of an anonymous Web site -- www.truthbible.net -- which said the holy book "made one tremble" given its sexual and violent content, including rape and incest.
The Web site said the Bible's sexual content "far exceeds" that of a recent sex column published in the Chinese University's "Student Press" magazine, which had asked readers whether they'd ever fantasized about incest or bestiality.
But surely this is all the work of godless atheists seeking to subvert the word of God, right? Well, let's have a look and see just what it is that's got them so upset.
Book of Genesis, chapter 19:
he two angels reached Sodom in the evening, as Lot was sitting at the gate of Sodom. When Lot saw them, he got up to greet them; and bowing down with his face to the ground, he said, "Please, gentlemen, come aside into your servant's house for the night, and bathe your feet; you can get up early to continue your journey." But they replied, "No, we shall pass the night in the town square." He urged them so strongly, however, that they turned aside to his place and entered his house. He prepared a meal for them, baking cakes without leaven, and they dined. Before they went to bed, all the townsmen of Sodom, both young and old--all the people to the last man--closed in on the house. They called to Lot and said to him, "Where are the men who came to your house tonight? Bring them out to us that we may have intimacies with them." Lot went out to meet them at the entrance. When he had shut the door behind him, he said, "I beg you, my brothers, not to do this wicked thing. I have two daughters who have never had intercourse with men. Let me bring them out to you, and you may do to them as you please. But don't do anything to these men, for you know they have come under the shelter of my roof."
Pretty hot and heavy stuff. I think I remember the same premise from a softcore porn movie on Cinemax.
Book of Deuteronomy, Chapter 22:
If a man find a damsel that is a virgin, which is not betrothed, and lay hold on her, and lie with her, and they be found;Then the man that lay with her shall give unto the damsel's father fifty shekels of silver, and she shall be his wife; because he hath humbled her, he may not put her away all his days.
Sex with virgins, rape, forced marriage. Scandalous!
Book of Samuel II, Chapter 16:
Ahithophel said to Absalom, Go in to your fathers concubines, that he has left to keep the house. Then all Israel will hear that you are abhorred by your father. Then the hands of all who are with you will be strong. So they spread Absalom a tent on the top of the house; and Absalom went in to his fathers concubines in the sight of all Israel.
Cavorting with his father's concubines in plain sight of everyone else? Who wouldn't be turned on?
Book of Isaiah, Chapter 36:
But Rabshakeh said, Hath my master sent me to thy master and to thee to speak these words? hath he not sent me to the men that sit upon the wall, that they may eat their own dung, and drink their own piss with you?
Eating shit and drinking piss, well that's got to turn on someone... probably.
OK, but that's all old testament stuff, fire and brimstone. Not like the New testament, which is all happiness and pleasantries, right? See for yourself.
Gospel according to Luke, chapter 12:
Do you think that I have come to give peace on earth? No, I tell you, but rather division. For from now on in one house there will be five divided, three against two and two against three. They will be divided, father against son and son against father, mother against daughter and daughter against mother, mother-in-law against her daughter-in-law and daughter-in-law against mother-in-law.
Doesn't exactly sound... peaceful, does it?
Gospel according to Luke, chapter 19:
But those mine enemies, which would not that I should reign over them, bring hither, and slay them before me.
That's not very friendly either.
Gospel according to Matthew, chapter 10:
Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Sounds rather violent to me.
The truth is that censorship of any reading material is abhorrent and not justifiable. But should religious books receive a pass just because they're religious? In an update from the Hong Kong media regulator, the answer is a resounding "Yes."
World's Greatest Fuck You Ever
In November, Keith Ellison of Minnesota became the first Muslim elected to Congress. Ellison then told the press that he would swear his oath on a Koran and all hell broke loose.
Conservative commentators went ape shit because they incorrectly believe the oath should be taken on something called The Bible. The controversy swelled when a fellow Congressman, Virgil Goode, declared:
"When I raise my hand to take the oath on Swearing In Day, I will have the Bible in my other hand. I do not subscribe to using the Koran in any way. The Muslim Representative from Minnesota was elected by the voters of that district and if American citizens don't wake up and adopt the Virgil Goode position on immigration there will likely be many more Muslims elected to office and demanding the use of the Koran."
Ellison was born in the United States and his family roots in this country can be traced back to 1742. None of that mattered to Goode, who became a hero on Fox News where he claimed that he stands for the principles upon which this country was founded. Goode represents the same Virginia county where Thomas Jefferson was born in 1743.
Which is probably why Ellison decided to shove Goodes morals down his ignorant throat throat with a little American history. Today Keith Ellison announced he would take his oath of office on a Koran that was owned by Thomas Jefferson.
Jefferson's copy is an English translation by George Sale published in the 1750s; it survived the 1851 fire that destroyed most of Jefferson's collection and has his customary initialing on the pages.
It survived the fire because God wanted it to be used in a future go fuck yourself moment. Goode has no comment.