- commentary
- THURSDAY JULY 31 2008 6:00 AM
Republican Corruption Blowout!
Submitted by FearTheReaper
Edited by erin_broadley
Republicans seem to be having some sort of summer corruption blowout. Between an on-the-run Karl Rove, a gagged EPA, a law breaking Justice Department and an indicted Senator Ted Stevens, its a jamboree of wrongness. The current Republican Party takes a daily bath in sweet corruption, but this week stands above all others.
Let us start with Karl Rove, everyones favorite pasty, flabby beast. Yesterday, the House Judiciary Committee voted to hold Karl in contempt of Congress.
A House panel Wednesday voted to cite former top White House aide Karl Rove for contempt of Congress for defying a subpoena to answer questions about the dismissals of several federal prosecutors as its Senate counterpart explored punishments for an array of alleged past and present Bush administration misdeeds.
Karl is, of course, willing to speak to members of the House Judiciary Committee behind closed doors without any recording of the conversation, because thats what innocent guys do. He also wants it to happen in a submarine in the middle of the Atlantic and everyone must be nude. Also, after the meeting all Senators must be sandblasted until their hair and skin is removed. Finally, they must be blinded and their memories erased.
Karl doesnt want to testify in front of Congress because hes as guilty as they come. But dont expect the Democrats to do anything. Nancy The Coward Pelosi still has to approve the final vote in front of the entire House. If someone could be held accountable, you can be sure Nancy will run away. But still, its fun to see Karls name and contempt in the same headline.
The Justice Department is also looking like a giant, steaming turd today. Anyone could have read the story on the front page of the Washington Post yesterday. The Justice Departments Office of the Inspector General and Office of Professional Responsibility released a report and, well, is it good when the Justice Department has been breaking the law? I'm guessing it's not good, mostly because it is called THE JUSTICE DEPARTMENT.
For nearly two years, a young political aide sought to cultivate a "farm system" for Republicans at the Justice Department, hiring scores of prosecutors and immigration judges who espoused conservative priorities and Christian lifestyle choices.
That aide, Monica M. Goodling, exercised what amounted to veto power over a wide range of critical jobs, asking candidates for their views on abortion and same-sex marriage and maneuvering around senior officials who outranked her, including the department's second-in-command.
Oops. All that stuff is illegal, Monica. But its not surprising, considering she was the White House liaison. Huh, I wonder why Karl wont answer questions under oath?
And speaking of breaking the law, what up Ted Stevens? Yesterday, Ted became the first Senator in 20 years to be indicted for felonies while serving in office. Well done, sir. The bat-shit, crazy Alaskan Senator was indicted on seven felony counts for lying to hide the $250,000 in gifts and services he received from an oil and construction company.
VECO employees and contractors performed architectural design services, put the house on stilts and installed a new three-bedroom first floor, a finished basement, a garage, a Viking gas range and a wraparound deck, according to the indictment.
While Stevens paid a construction firm for its work, he never reimbursed VECO or its contractors.
Shit. I didnt realize I couldnt take a three-bedroom first floor, a basement, a garage, a gas range and a wraparound deck from my buddy. How about if I give it back?
Meanwhile, as Stevens then served as the powerful chairman of the Senate Appropriations Committee, Allen and VECO sought his help with international projects, grants from the National Science Foundation and funding for a natural gas pipeline on Alaskas North Slope, the grand jury charged.
Stevens is looking at 5 years in the slammer. Hes 84. Im laughing.
And finally, the EPA is going into some sort of Branch Davidian Waco lockdown, sans the kid fucking. Under Bush, the EPA has taken a lot of shit for lying and basically doing the opposite of what it was created to do. Several congressional committees have requested documents on the EPAs position on global warming and the EPA responded with a giant, Go fuck yourself. Last week, EPA Administrator Stephen Johnson decided not to appear in front of two Senate committees to discuss why the agency does the opposite of its staff's technical and legal recommendations. And now the agency is in crazy lockdown mode.
The Environmental Protection Agency is telling its pollution enforcement officials not to talk with congressional investigators, reporters and even the agency's own inspector general, according to an internal e-mail provided to The Associated Press.
The June 16 message instructs 11 managers in the EPA's Office of Enforcement and Compliance Assurance, the branch of the agency charged with making sure environmental laws are followed, to remind their staff members to keep quiet.
Lets fire some tear gas in there and send in the battering rams. My God, just think of the shit we are going to learn about these agencies when Bush leaves office and a new crew comes in.
The current Republican Party is insane.
FearTheReaper is a writer, actor and stand up comedian. You can read more of his blathering on his blog, Stop All Monsters.





PAGE:
1 | 2 | 3
Comments
Weatherpunk
Japan
June 2008
JUL 31, 2008 07:22 AM
erin_broadley
Los Angeles, CA
October 2006
JUL 31, 2008 10:22 AM
MetalsmithJJ
Denton, TX
February 2007
JUL 31, 2008 11:26 AM
SockPuppet
I'm lost
July 2006
JUL 31, 2008 12:16 PM
nice_pun_bro
Irvine, CA
January 2007
JUL 31, 2008 03:19 PM
Vykos1579
Higganum, CT
April 2008
JUL 31, 2008 03:45 PM
Varuka_Salt
I'm lost
October 2006
JUL 31, 2008 03:49 PM
injuredcyclist
Portland, OR
March 2006
JUL 31, 2008 04:48 PM
Bartlebee
United Kingdom
February 2007
JUL 31, 2008 04:52 PM
sick
Minneapolis, MN
June 2003
JUL 31, 2008 04:59 PM
Azadeth
Fairport, NY
August 2006
JUL 31, 2008 05:05 PM
livertarian
Fairfax, VA
February 2008
AUG 01, 2008 01:58 PM
SergeantPsycho
USA
January 2007
AUG 01, 2008 07:48 PM
CoyoteMike
Iowa City, IA
May 2006
AUG 01, 2008 07:58 PM
TheJuanupsman
Hopkins, MN
April 2004
AUG 01, 2008 08:54 PM
PAGE:
1 | 2 | 3