John McCain is an insanely rich man. Johnny and his wife own eight houses. That’s pretty sweet. How many houses do you own? The wife is an heiress to the third largest Budweiser distributor in America. The company is worth $300 million, which makes Cindy McCain worth a sweet $100 million.

Wow. A private jet. That’s some serious common-man shit right there. And just like most guys, the family owns a piece of a major league baseball team.

Groovy. I’ve bought a few baseball tickets, so we’ve got quite a bit in common. Oh, and Johnny likes to entertain the press at his modest estate.

Of course, the majority of this information was released with Grandpa’s tax return information to the press. John apparently lives on a paltry salary.

They probably use his salary to tip the staff.

Now, you’re probably wondering why I’m bringing up the incredible wealth of Mr. and Mrs. McCain. It’s no crime to be rich, even if you keep calling your opponent an “Elitist.” Well, what about a guy whose family is worth over $100 million who is taking yearly Navy benefits of $58,358?

That’s how much McCain took in last year for injuries incurred as a Vietnam POW. He sort of forgot to list it in the tax return he released to the media, but that’s probably because the benefits not taxed. How sweet is that? Fifty-eight thousand tax free. Might actually mean something if he wasn’t a crazy rich millionaire.

His body is so “limited” that he hiked the Grand Canyon in 2006. Actually, his staff described him as “technically disabled," the poor bastard. Actually, McCain did experience some horrible injuries. When his plane went down, he had a broken leg and two broken arms. The Vietnamese then hung him from his broken leg for a while, which is totally not cool. Maybe that was why Johnny sung like a bird when he was in captivity – after a whole 13 days.

McCain was shot down on October 26th, 1967. By November 9th, he was giving interviews to foreign correspondents, providing information on his prior command, casualties and tactics, which is kind of in direct violation of the Military Code of Conduct. But, hey, he was tortured. He spent 5 ½ years as a POW. I’m sure some of you are saying the guy deserves the cash.

He would, if he wasn’t a hypocritical douche. See, Senators Jim Webb and Chuck Hagel wrote a new GI bill last year that would increase troop college education benefits. Considering how royally we are fucking over our troops, it’s pretty much a no brainer to increase their education benefits.

Well, not for “58K A Year McCain.” Even though Webb practically begged him to support the bill, McCain opposed it.

Nice. He didn’t even bother to show up for the vote. See, he knows what it is like to be a soldier. Like most soldiers, he returned home, divorced his model wife because she had become fat and married a multi-millionaire. Now he collects a sweet 58 thousand a year while opposing a needed increase in education benefits.



So, why does McCain oppose the bill? It’s actually the most disgusting reason you could think up.

John doesn’t want to give soldiers incentive to leave the military. The Pentagon is opposed to the bill – and Bush will veto it – because…

Oh, the horror. We can’t have that, now can we? So, every time you look at McCain, think about how that millionaire is taking in $58,000 a year, tax free, while opposing an increase in education benefits for our soldiers, because it will keep them stuck in the military.

McCain is a class A cunt.