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GOP Prepares For Anal Rape

THURSDAY MAY 15 2008 12:00 PM

Submitted by FearTheReaper. Edited By erin_broadley.

TAGS: Republicans, Election 08

The big news during this primary season is not Barack Obama, but the shit kicking Republicans have taken in three Congressional districts. Illinois, Louisiana and Mississippi have given the GOP a glimpse of the future – and it is one ugly sight for the right wing. In each of these states, a Republican stronghold district was holding a special election because the GOP incumbent retired. And in each district, the Republicans lost to a Democrat. Losing in these areas would be like a Democrat losing in San Francisco. Expect a brutal bloodbath in November.

It’s the perfect storm. Republicans are stuck with the most unpopular president of all time, an unpopular war, a horrible economy and a fired up Democratic base. Many GOP lawmakers are retiring because their orgy days in Congress are over. So far, 30 Republicans lawmakers have retired or won’t seek re-election, compared to only 7 Democrats. Turns out the GOP suddenly found themselves unpopular with lobbyists and voters, alike.

Speaker of the House Dennis Hastert announced his retirement last year and his seat was up for grabs during the March 5th Illinois primary. Republicans spent a massive $1.2 million on a seat that they held for two decades. That amounted to 20% of the Republican Congressional Committee’s total cash on hand – and they were spending it in a district that hadn’t been competitive for decades. In 2004, Bush won the district 55%-44%. This is deep in Republican land.

Yet, local businessman and Democrat Bill Foster won the seat easily, with 53% of the vote. Not a good sign for John McCain, who campaigned and raised money for the Republican loser. And not a good sign for the GOP “Iraq is going super” mantra. Foster is strongly opposed to the war, while the Republican loser kept saying the surge was working. Not so much.

Next up on the Republican shame train was May 5th in Louisiana. Republican Richard Baker retired from Congress after 11 terms. The district he represented had been in GOP control for 33 years and, like Hastert’s seat, was largely a conservative and rural district. Serious Republican country – or it was, anyway.

Republicans also spent heavily in this Louisiana special election, dropping $1 million on radio and TV ads trying to link Democratic candidate Don Cazayoux to Barack Obama (black guy) and Nancy Pelosi (lady). FAIL. Cazayoux squeaked by with a 49% to 46% victory. That is an incredibly pathetic number for a Republican candidate in a conservative district, one that was actually redrawn in 2000 to make it even “more reliably Republican.” Richard Baker had won the previous 2 races with 72% and 83% and in 2004, Bush won with 59% of all votes. Now Republicans aren’t even hitting that all-important 50% number. Welcome to the world of grim.

Finally, on Tuesday night, Democrat Travis Childers easily beat his Republican opponent in a conservative Mississippi district. By “easily,” I mean 54% - 46%. That’s a fucking ridiculous number for a Democrat in a Republican stronghold and means a serious anal rape for the GOP come November.

This was as safe a seat as Republicans have. In 2004, the district voted for Bush by a margin of 62% to 37%. The GOP had a decent candidate named Greg Davis, who didn’t bring any baggage. Trent Lott, Mike Huckabee, Dick Cheney and Haley Barbour all showed up and campaigned with Davis. The Republican Congressional Committee spent $1.3 million, Davis spent over a million and Freedom Watch spent $500,000. And they went as pathetic as possible with their ads.



Black guy, black guy, lady! Oh, my God!

And yet, it resulted in a spectacular Republican FAIL. It is inconceivable that Republicans lost this seat and a harbinger of doom. The GOP can do nothing to stop the brutal devastation heading their way. Well, that’s not true, they can lube up and relax their sphincters. EVERY Republican seat is now officially in play. You will see them attack each other and even their God, George Bush. It only took 8 hours for a Republican House member to take a shot at El Presidente.


Rep. Tom Davis stomped on the concrete floor of the Capitol basement when asked by reporters about Republican fortunes at the moment.

"This is the floor," he said, by way of explanation. "We're below the floor."

Inside the meeting, Davis had just presented his colleagues with what he said was a 20-page memo outlining his prescription for a way out of this mess. He did not offer details to the press, yet did not spare the party and the president scathing criticism in his public comments.

"The president swallows the microphone every time he opens his mouth," Davis said.


Tommy is the representative for the city of Babytown. Here’s a tip, Tommy: For the past eight years, when Bush was putting forth the most retarded policies of all time, you probably shouldn’t have been tickling his balls and taking his load into your mouth. When Americans turned against the war, you probably shouldn’t have done everything in your power to keep it going. When Bush put forth his insane tax cuts during a time of war, you probably shouldn’t have acted like they were the second coming of Jesus. You are spineless, deluded cunts and the suffering coming your way is of your own making.

And just in case you don't get it, here’s where you stand, you ignorant shit beast.

The public believes Democrats are better than Republicans on most important issues by massive margins.


    On the economy, Democrats now have a 14-point advantage over the Republicans.

    On Government Ethics and Corruption - 45% now trust Democrats, while just 26% prefer the GOP.

    On National Security and the War on Terror, 49% of voters now trust the Democrats more, while 42% trust the Republicans more.

    On Iraq, Democrats hold an 11-point lead over the Republicans.


Congressional Republicans can blame Bush all they want, but they are at fault spending the past eight years acting like NAMBLA on a boy fuck-trip to Bangkok. Without a care in the world, they plundered our country and indulged in the most selfish and unethical acts democratically elected officials could. They aren’t even a party anymore. The GOP is a just a brothel, created to service corporate cocks in their angry, wet holes. Let the suffering begin.

 

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Nolan_Void

Nolan_Void

Salisbury, NC
July 2004

MAY 16, 2008 12:31 PM

Narghile said:
Some things bean and Nolan_Void have said in this thread are things I just didn't know about. Thanks, gentlemen! kiss



Discourse like this benefits us all.

Stiles

Stiles

New York, NY
November 2002

MAY 16, 2008 12:45 PM

^^^ Absolutely.

Let me add that it's easy to forget that operating a computer can be a mystery to those who didn't grow up with the technology. Once you're over the hurdle of getting a computer and getting online, then you need to figure out how to frame a proper Google search, and then develop the skill to tell bullshit websites from legitimate ones.

This can be harder than it sounds, since uneducated and/or inexperienced people tend to believe everything they read, especially if it comes from what seems to be a reliable source. There are lots of people who wouldn't know the difference between the Washington Times and the Washington Post, for instance.

This skill is easy to take for granted since we've been doing it for so long it is second nature, but for poor folks living their lives in rural areas without a computer and net access, this is as foreign as it comes.

DevilsReject

DevilsReject

Cleveland, OH
February 2007

MAY 16, 2008 01:28 PM

Mr_Matt_ said:
Hopefully, the younger generation, with it's (improved) access to the information age, will be able to break out of this rut.



I really don't want to stereotype the state, so i am speaking from personal experience.

I spent some time there with a girlfriend that had family down there, we went to a Family Reunion right around the summer of 2003. We drove into a town that was basically carved into the side of a mountain.

I felt stupid because when i got there, her family still used an outhouse and the water running into the house was from a well. It reeked of sulfur and wasn't always clear. They had one phone between the three houses that were within a mile of one another and one television from about 1974, that got about 4 channels, not clear either. I was naive enough to believe that in the 2000's that this didn't exist anymore.

The whole time i was down there i was kind of in culture shock. I have four desktop computers and a laptop, cable connections, air cards, cell phones and PDA's are a part of my everyday life, i am a tech geek. I was frowned upon because of my tattoos, asked if i was gay several times and it was just assumed that i worshiped Satan. I mentioned "Bluetooth" and was looked at like i was insane.

They don't worry about college in this little town. They don't worry about anymore education than the "damned Yankee government" requires. I can't tell you the number of times that her grandmother said "I only got a sixth grade education, and i am fine!".

I am pretty sure her grandfather hated me, not for anymore reason than i was from a "big city". The feeling was just about mutual because the word "nigger" poured from his lips ignorantly in just about every sentence he used. They don't do white collar work. They're basically blue collar to the bone and have no desire to change that.

While i am sure things in the bigger cities of West Virginia are different. There are plentiful amounts of people living in the hollers and the hills that are perfectly happy with how they are living life. They're basically cut-off from society and don't care and really have no desire to change. They're family roots run deep, and they stay very close together in their beliefs and keep the family extremely close.

About two weeks after we got back from the Family re-union the girl who grew up there and i was dating, broke up with me because "Her grandparents didn't like me", even though she lives roughly 6 hours away from them, she still held onto the fact that she needed to impress her family with who she was dating. So even though she didn't live there anymore, her ideals still centered around keeping the family happy.

It's a different world in some places, and i am sure that is true in more places than just West Virginia. Change comes very, very slow to places like that.



Mr_Matt_

Mr_Matt_

Hollywood, FL
July 2005

MAY 16, 2008 02:09 PM

DevilsReject said:

Mr_Matt_ said:
Hopefully, the younger generation, with it's (improved) access to the information age, will be able to break out of this rut.



I really don't want to stereotype the state, so i am speaking from personal experience.



Oh, I understand. I too have found myself in similar situations, where for the life of me I couldn't understand what they were even saying.

I guess that's why I used "Hopefully".

Hopefully, whatever shitty school the government forces them to go to has some internet connection. Anything that can expose them to the outside world.

DevilsReject

DevilsReject

Cleveland, OH
February 2007

MAY 16, 2008 03:02 PM

Mr_Matt_ said:

DevilsReject said:

Mr_Matt_ said:
Hopefully, the younger generation, with it's (improved) access to the information age, will be able to break out of this rut.



I really don't want to stereotype the state, so i am speaking from personal experience.



Oh, I understand. I too have found myself in similar situations, where for the life of me I couldn't understand what they were even saying.

I guess that's why I used "Hopefully".

Hopefully, whatever shitty school the government forces them to go to has some internet connection. Anything that can expose them to the outside world.



Unfortunately you get into the small southern cities of Ohio and it's the same way. There are also cities like that in Kentucky, PA and Indiana that i have personally been to.

Life outside their beliefs and the edge of their town just doesn't exist. It's quite frightening actually. You try to enlighten them and they just see you as an outsider with a marred opinion on how life should work.

I think there are parts of every state like this, just not to the degree there are in West Virginia. I've been to some scary backwards parts of Florida too, as i am sure you have.


SPOILERS! (Click to view)
[off topic]
I think the all time best thing i remember from when i used to travel for work when i was in Louisiana, just outside of New Orleans, horribly lost. I stopped at a gas station and asked, what i would later find out was a person considered a "Cajun" for directions. I had no clue what he said to me, but he definitely had a deep down belly laugh, he pointed a lot and nodded with a big smile on his face. He was nice enough, i just had no clue what he was saying to me. I drove out of the gas station to the gas station across the street and found someone i could understand. They described to me what "Cajun English" was, and that is what was being spoken to me at the gas station across the street.

Gillionaire

Gillionaire

Manchester, NH
February 2007

MAY 16, 2008 03:18 PM

Mr_Matt_ said:

Old_Fritz said:

Mr_Matt_ said:
If those people in WV I saw on the videos are representative of the ignorance...

Which videos?



There's this one from the other thread.





And others which are floating around, but you get the idea.



This video saddens me. Especially the "The USA should be run by someone FROM the USA" lady. Face palm city.

SockPuppet

SockPuppet

I'm lost
July 2006

MAY 16, 2008 05:01 PM

Stiles said:
^^^ Absolutely.

Let me add that it's easy to forget that operating a computer can be a mystery to those who didn't grow up with the technology. Once you're over the hurdle of getting a computer and getting online, then you need to figure out how to frame a proper Google search, and then develop the skill to tell bullshit websites from legitimate ones.

This can be harder than it sounds, since uneducated and/or inexperienced people tend to believe everything they read, especially if it comes from what seems to be a reliable source. There are lots of people who wouldn't know the difference between the Washington Times and the Washington Post, for instance.



That would include lots of non-American people.

seme

seme

Czech Republic
July 2005

MAY 16, 2008 07:31 PM

Nice to see the ridiculous rhetoric is still a viable substitution for actual intelligent discourse when it comes to politics.

Before you cream yourself in glee you might actually want to spend a minute actually reading Don Cazayoux's political platform. He's FAR from a candidate lefties should be patting themselves on the back as a great upset. He's pro-life, against gun control, pro-war on terror (and from the phrase 'bring our troops home with honor' I suspect pro-Iraq), seemingly pro-Patriot Act and against amnesty for illegal immigrants. All of this would have taken you three minutes to find out ... but no it's way easier just to read "Democrat" and assume this is a massive victory.

What's most distressing is how many Democrats have their heads up their asses. You can't assume that negative views on Iraq will equal a win, if that were true Kerry would have taken the Presidency four years ago when the war was at its most violent and most unpopular. But he didn't, probably for the same reason the Democrats are likely to lose this time too: he assumed he had it locked up and forgot to actually run for President. Not only are the Democrats NOT reaching out to independents and moderate Republicans, they're making such a show about tearing each other apart they're risking losing a chunk of their own party's vote. The dirtiness between Obama and Clinton is making the Dems look ridiculous and turning swing voters off while McCain is smelling like a rose.

_kungfoo_

_kungfoo_

Los Angeles, CA
April 2005

MAY 16, 2008 08:06 PM



Can somebody take Mike Huckabee's fucking gun away from him because apparently he doesn't know how to handle one. You never point a gun at something you don't intend to shoot.

This is the primary rule of gun safety. A safe direction means that the gun is pointed so that even if it were to go off it would not cause injury or damage. The key to this rule is to control where the muzzle or front end of the barrel is pointed at all times.

_kungfoo_

_kungfoo_

Los Angeles, CA
April 2005

MAY 16, 2008 08:08 PM

The GOP just can't keep that bigotry in check. It's leaking through like cracks in a dam.

Coyotemike

Coyotemike

Kearney, NE
May 2006

MAY 16, 2008 08:12 PM

Schteeve said:


Can somebody take Mike Huckabee's fucking gun away from him because apparently he doesn't know how to handle one. You never point a gun at something you don't intend to shoot.

This is the primary rule of gun safety. A safe direction means that the gun is pointed so that even if it were to go off it would not cause injury or damage. The key to this rule is to control where the muzzle or front end of the barrel is pointed at all times.



The joke is bad enough, but something else he said made me think. All these people calling for less government regulation and oversight . . . . it's starting to make me wonder what they are wanting to get up to that is illegal under federal regulations

gdarklighter

gdarklighter

San Diego, CA
August 2005

MAY 16, 2008 08:16 PM

seme said:
Not only are the Democrats NOT reaching out to independents and moderate Republicans, they're making such a show about tearing each other apart they're risking losing a chunk of their own party's vote.


Are you always this wrong? Obama's been grabbing independent votes like crazy and he's running an honest-to-god 50 states strategy, and it's one that the DCCC has been emulating.

Also, only trolls use the (exceptionally loaded) phrase "pro-war on terror". Democrats aren't against the war on terror. They're against a war on terror headed by an incompetent administration.

_kungfoo_

_kungfoo_

Los Angeles, CA
April 2005

MAY 16, 2008 08:23 PM

coyotemike said:
The joke is bad enough, but something else he said made me think. All these people calling for less government regulation and oversight . . . . it's starting to make me wonder what they are wanting to get up to that is illegal under federal regulations



I don't know. In case of Mike Huckabee, it just seems to be a weird allegiance to his anti-government ideology. Much like the Paultards, they seem to grab hold of specific examples of government waste and inefficiency and spread it over any and every argument of more vs. less government like better.

Mike Huckabee isn't that deep. Government bad. Jesus good.

malkav11

malkav11

Saint Paul, MN
July 2003

MAY 16, 2008 11:29 PM

gdarklighter said:

seme said:
Not only are the Democrats NOT reaching out to independents and moderate Republicans, they're making such a show about tearing each other apart they're risking losing a chunk of their own party's vote.


Are you always this wrong? Obama's been grabbing independent votes like crazy and he's running an honest-to-god 50 states strategy, and it's one that the DCCC has been emulating.

Also, only trolls use the (exceptionally loaded) phrase "pro-war on terror". Democrats aren't against the war on terror. They're against a war on terror headed by an incompetent administration.



I am against the "war on terror". It's a ridiculous notion, pandering to people scared of their own shadows and being used to curtail rights and freedoms. Little to none of which is making us any safer.

Of course, I'm not a Democrat.

(And I am specifically against the ludicrous concept of the war on terror. Such minimal additional precautions as are appropriate for maximal +safety/minimal -convenience are of course more than welcome.)

RudieCantFail

RudieCantFail

Intercourse, PA
January 2006

MAY 17, 2008 12:15 AM

seme said:
Before you cream yourself in glee you might actually want to spend a minute actually reading Don Cazayoux's political platform. He's FAR from a candidate lefties should be patting themselves on the back as a great upset. He's pro-life, against gun control, pro-war on terror (and from the phrase 'bring our troops home with honor' I suspect pro-Iraq), seemingly pro-Patriot Act and against amnesty for illegal immigrants. All of this would have taken you three minutes to find out ... but no it's way easier just to read "Democrat" and assume this is a massive victory.



As a Louisiana voter that identifies himself proudly as liberal, I can tell you that while Don Cazayoux may not be my ideal representative, he's as good as I can realistically hope for. It will take 100 years before the kind of candidate I consider to be ideal will ever have a shot in Louisiana. The fact that Don Cazayoux won as a Democrat down here is stupendous in and of itself. At the very least, a representative who is registered with the Democractic party, will be far more likely to represent my views than any of his Republican counterparts.


What's most distressing is how many Democrats have their heads up their asses. You can't assume that negative views on Iraq will equal a win, if that were true Kerry would have taken the Presidency four years ago when the war was at its most violent and most unpopular.



Citation needed. In 2004, the war was only a year old, and though Bush's support was waning, it was no where near the abysmal levels it is at now.


But he didn't, probably for the same reason the Democrats are likely to lose this time too: he assumed he had it locked up and forgot to actually run for President.



False. Kerry was a wooden and unpersonable candidate, just like Gore. Kerry and Gore also fell into the trap of fighting the non-issue battles that the Republicans choose. Obama has shown every indication so far, in his campaign against Hillary of not stooping to her ridiculous shots unless absolutely necessary. He doesn't allow his opponents to choose the battles.


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