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PETA: Creeping Me Out More

TUESDAY APRIL 22 2008 6:00 AM

Submitted by FearTheReaper. Edited By erin_broadley.

TAGS: PETA, In Vitro Meat

Oh PETA, why so crazy? There is a way to fight for the rights of animals without sometimes looking like complete and total lunatics. In this latest episode of PETA creepiness, they want someone to make Frankenmeat.


The organization said it would announce plans on Monday for a $1 million prize to the “first person to come up with a method to produce commercially viable quantities of in vitro meat at competitive prices by 2012.”


Mmmm, daddy wants a big tub of meat. I’m trying to think of a type of food I’d rather eat less than meat created in a test tube and I’m at a loss. This also shows a total lack of understanding of meat eaters. Meat eaters aren’t creepy, bloodthirsty psychos; they just like meat and they don't care that animals have to die for their nourishment.

I can’t even begin to understand what PETA thinks they are going to accomplish with their in vitro meat contest. Wasting one million dollars is amazing, even for them – and it seems a bit off target. PETA's slogan is "animals are not ours to eat, wear, experiment on, or use for entertainment." So, I guess they think if they create some awesome fake meat in a lab, they will save animals. FAIL. Huge fail. Spectacular fail.

The decision is actually causing a PETA civil war. Soon the group may break into PFMPETA (Pro Fake Meat PETA) and AFMPETA (Against Fake Meat PETA). I guess some PETA members are not as crazy as I thought.


But, Ms. Newkirk said, the decision to sponsor a prize caused “a near civil war in our office,” since so many PETA members are repulsed by the thought of eating animal tissue, even if no animals are killed.

Lisa Lange, a vice president of the organization, said she was part of the heated exchange. “My main concern is, as the largest animal rights organization in the world, it’s our job to introduce the philosophy and hammer it home that animals are not ours to eat.” Ms. Lange added, “I remember saying I would be much more comfortable promoting eating roadkill.”


Let me re-phrase that. I guess some PETA members are crazier than I thought. Also, I don’t want to live in the world where one has to choose between eating roadkill or in vitro meat. Can’t I just have a banana?

If you are interested in the million dollars, you have to create laboratory chicken and sell it to the public by June 30, 2012. (Hi, arbitrary fake meat date.) The winner must also do the following:


• Produce an in vitro chicken-meat product that has a taste and texture indistinguishable from real chicken flesh to non-meat-eaters and meat-eaters alike.
• Manufacture the approved product in large enough quantities to be sold commercially, and successfully sell it at a competitive price in at least 10 states.


Why would non-meat eaters care about the taste and texture of chicken? Why not make a realistic lab vagina that feels natural for gay men? Actually, that’s a good idea. I’m offering one million for lab-grown vaginas – and I want them created in bulk and sold at competitive rates to real vaginas in 17 states.

I am no fan of meat. Beef farms are the worst things on the face of the Earth for the environment. The volume of waste they produce and the amount of water consumed is astounding. The beef produced is full of hormones and toxins. But the solution is not lab meat - I actually find that less appealing than toxin filled meat. The solution is to not eat meat.

I am horrified by the idea of giant labs pumping out huge slabs of juicy, fake meat. It is a future I want no part of. I will do everything in my power to free the slave meat, if that day ever comes. Please join FIVSMOD (Free In Vitro Slave Meat Or Die) before it is too late.

 

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JunkyardAngel

JunkyardAngel

San Gabriel, CA
February 2006

APR 23, 2008 02:11 PM

jonze said:
I'm sorry, but we, as a species, didn't bite, scratch, claw and club our way to the top of the food chain just to turn around and give it all up.



Are you sure about that? Can you make a case for that? We food-chain-topping humans are always coming up with all sorts of new ways to do things, new gadgets, new ideas, new ways of looking at things (and reasons for doing so). What makes you so sure what the next step is?

Maybe, perhaps...could it be? That we clawed and etc. to get to a place in the food chain where we can solve world hunger? biggrin

motorfirebox

motorfirebox

Pittsburgh, PA
March 2004

APR 23, 2008 02:39 PM

Manji999 said:
I dont think meat grown in a tube can be natural


my meat tube is unnaturally awesome. does that count?

fluxation said:
Bananas aren't a source of protein.


bananas (at least the specific species that you buy at most grocery stores) are also quite likely going to die out in the next few years, due to stupid crop planning methods. when those are gone, we'll move on to another, less-tasty breed of bananas, and then those will all die out. the banana situation is dire.

jonze said:
I'm sorry, but we, as a species, didn't bite, scratch, claw and club our way to the top of the food chain just to turn around and give it all up.


i'm not sure if you're talking about not eating meat, or switching to tubmeat instead of butchering actual animals. if it's the latter, well, i honestly don't see a difference (from the biting/scratching/clawing/clubbing standpoint) between eating meat from a factory farm, and eating meat grown in a tub. in both cases, the values of a hunter-gatherer caveman are not present.

DevilsReject

DevilsReject

Cleveland, OH
February 2007

APR 23, 2008 03:08 PM

jonze said:
I'm sorry, but we, as a species, didn't bite, scratch, claw and club our way to the top of the food chain just to turn around and give it all up.



The only reason we are at the top of the food chain is for three reasons.

1. opposable thumb.
2. intelligence (for the most part)
3. breeding habits.

If you ever noticed, it took 7 or 8 of our ancestors to take down animals in the wild, even then the animal could usually maul one or two of them. That's where our breeding habits and pack mentality come into play. Lose a tribesperson? make another one. Put one human, without any weapons, up against a grizzly or a polar bear, and they're basically lunch.

We have the ability to create and utilize tools, such as spears. We learned how animals migrated, and how fish swam upstream at certain times of the year. We used our tools and intelligence to hunt and gather.

The opposable thumb helped us make and throw the spear, make nets for catching fish, and other such wonderful things.

If you were to take any one of those three things away, we are just a big flesh colored marshmallow to any carnivorous animal. Most people have lost the ability to defend themselves and care for themselves in the wild, and if we were to have a natural/terroristic disaster that took out our main infrastructure, you'd see a lot of people die off due to being so dependent on modern accessories, like grocery stores.

While i do occasionally eat meat, i mostly stick to greens and other vegetables, i am not entirely vegetarian. My carnivorous side does come out every once in a while, as long as the meat tasted the same, and had the same texture, it wouldn't really entirely bother me.

flayhugh

flayhugh

I'm lost
January 2008

APR 23, 2008 03:21 PM

I don't have anything against vegetarians, or vegans, but I could not convert to either way of existing. My body reacts poorly to soy, and meat substitutes. Probably as poorly as meat would react to someone that has lived their whole life on a vegan lifestyle.

As the poet once said, "If God didn't want us to eat animals, he shouldn't have made them so damn tasty."

In theory, manufactured meat is potentially a good idea. Except for the fact that we wouldn't be able to export it other countries that would need it for example...because even if it was 100% perfectly healthy and better for you than real meat...you'd still have some crazies that sound convincing enough telling people how dangerous it is. (like the people who are against the engineered fruits and vegetables)

ARRR!!!

PixieStar

PixieStar

Minneapolis, MN
January 2007

APR 23, 2008 08:33 PM

rawkz said:
Don't they ever wonder what will happen to the cows and chickens if everyone stopped eating them? Do they really think people will spend millions to keep herds of cows alive just as pets?? I am sure one day PETA will realize that if we really all stopped eating meat, cows and chickens would be pretty much wiped out as they would have no use anymore and would be to expensive to keep for no profit. Actually they might never realize that... they are lunatics with no for sight into a realitistic future.


Not only will the animals die it will also put alot of people out of work. Think of it, a whole industry gone. Sure a new one pops up but it will be a lab with educated workers. What are the farmers to do, they lose there source of income, have animals they can't afford to feed, no one wants to by them they produce not money, probably lose there house not because they can't afford it but the area is condemned due to the rotting corpse of the farm animals.

RudieCantFail

RudieCantFail

Intercourse, PA
January 2006

APR 23, 2008 08:37 PM

DevilsReject said:

jonze said:
I'm sorry, but we, as a species, didn't bite, scratch, claw and club our way to the top of the food chain just to turn around and give it all up.



The only reason we are at the top of the food chain is for three reasons.

1. opposable thumb.
2. intelligence (for the most part)
3. breeding habits.

If you ever noticed, it took 7 or 8 of our ancestors to take down animals in the wild, even then the animal could usually maul one or two of them. That's where our breeding habits and pack mentality come into play. Lose a tribesperson? make another one. Put one human, without any weapons, up against a grizzly or a polar bear, and they're basically lunch.

We have the ability to create and utilize tools, such as spears. We learned how animals migrated, and how fish swam upstream at certain times of the year. We used our tools and intelligence to hunt and gather.

The opposable thumb helped us make and throw the spear, make nets for catching fish, and other such wonderful things.

If you were to take any one of those three things away, we are just a big flesh colored marshmallow to any carnivorous animal. Most people have lost the ability to defend themselves and care for themselves in the wild, and if we were to have a natural/terroristic disaster that took out our main infrastructure, you'd see a lot of people die off due to being so dependent on modern accessories, like grocery stores.

While i do occasionally eat meat, i mostly stick to greens and other vegetables, i am not entirely vegetarian. My carnivorous side does come out every once in a while, as long as the meat tasted the same, and had the same texture, it wouldn't really entirely bother me.



You can see in our ancestors, however, that their is a direct correlation between their brain size and the amount of concentrated protein (meat) that made up their diet.

silversoul7

silversoul7

Portland, OR
January 2008

APR 23, 2008 09:21 PM

PixieStar said:

rawkz said:
Don't they ever wonder what will happen to the cows and chickens if everyone stopped eating them? Do they really think people will spend millions to keep herds of cows alive just as pets?? I am sure one day PETA will realize that if we really all stopped eating meat, cows and chickens would be pretty much wiped out as they would have no use anymore and would be to expensive to keep for no profit. Actually they might never realize that... they are lunatics with no for sight into a realitistic future.


Not only will the animals die it will also put alot of people out of work. Think of it, a whole industry gone. Sure a new one pops up but it will be a lab with educated workers. What are the farmers to do, they lose there source of income, have animals they can't afford to feed, no one wants to by them they produce not money, probably lose there house not because they can't afford it but the area is condemned due to the rotting corpse of the farm animals.


It seems to me that the farms this stuff will put out of business will be the big corporate farms. Then small family farms can thrive once again.

ASSH0LE

ASSH0LE

Las Vegas, NV
June 2003

APR 24, 2008 03:58 AM

scylis said:
dogs and cats, living together! total anarchy!



This pussy seems to be enjoying itself.

motorfirebox

motorfirebox

Pittsburgh, PA
March 2004

APR 24, 2008 08:41 AM

silversoul7 said:
It seems to me that the farms this stuff will put out of business will be the big corporate farms. Then small family farms can thrive once again.


it still remains that a hell of a lot of people will be out of a job if those corporate farms shut down. maybe the smaller family farms will thrive, in that case--or maybe they won't, because the loss of such a large industry would put a serious kink in the national economy, which would mean that a) nobody's going to have money to buy a farm, and b) nobody's going to have money to buy what the farms are selling anyhow.

to be honest, though, i don't see tubmeat putting corporate farms out of business. actual cow/chicken/pig flesh, butchered from live animals, will simply become a luxury item instead of a regular commodity. corporate farms will shrink because demand will go down, but they'll be able to charge more for their product.

d20

d20

San Francisco, CA
September 2003

APR 24, 2008 12:19 PM

PixieStar said:

rawkz said:
Don't they ever wonder what will happen to the cows and chickens if everyone stopped eating them? Do they really think people will spend millions to keep herds of cows alive just as pets?? I am sure one day PETA will realize that if we really all stopped eating meat, cows and chickens would be pretty much wiped out as they would have no use anymore and would be to expensive to keep for no profit. Actually they might never realize that... they are lunatics with no for sight into a realitistic future.


Not only will the animals die it will also put alot of people out of work. Think of it, a whole industry gone. Sure a new one pops up but it will be a lab with educated workers. What are the farmers to do, they lose there source of income, have animals they can't afford to feed, no one wants to by them they produce not money, probably lose there house not because they can't afford it but the area is condemned due to the rotting corpse of the farm animals.



you're absolutely right.

if there's one thing history has taught us, it's that humans are totally unable to adapt to new conditions as the world around them changes.

Chainlink

Chainlink

Christmas Island
August 2005

APR 24, 2008 12:59 PM

flayhugh said:
As the poet once said, "If God didn't want us to eat animals, he shouldn't have made them so damn tasty."

ARRR!!!



Yeah, the poet.

Who was that ? Shakespeare ?

I forget
whatever

DevilsReject

DevilsReject

Cleveland, OH
February 2007

APR 24, 2008 01:20 PM

RudieCantFail said:
You can see in our ancestors, however, that their is a direct correlation between their brain size and the amount of concentrated protein (meat) that made up their diet.



Believe me, i watch the history channel/NatGeo/Discovery non-stop. Meat has played an important part in our development. What bothers me is that it seems we've hit the peak of our intelligence and are now on the downward spiral.

DevilsReject

DevilsReject

Cleveland, OH
February 2007

APR 24, 2008 01:21 PM

Chainlink said:

flayhugh said:
As the poet once said, "If God didn't want us to eat animals, he shouldn't have made them so damn tasty."

ARRR!!!



Yeah, the poet.

Who was that ? Shakespeare ?

I forget
whatever



Larry The Cable Guy. He's known for his exquisite poetry.

Colinism

Colinism

Atlanta, GA
July 2005

APR 24, 2008 01:22 PM

DevilsReject said:

RudieCantFail said:
You can see in our ancestors, however, that their is a direct correlation between their brain size and the amount of concentrated protein (meat) that made up their diet.



Believe me, i watch the history channel/NatGeo/Discovery non-stop. Meat has played an important part in our development. What bothers me is that it seems we've hit the peak of our intelligence and are now on the downward spiral.



That cus we no eat lot meat.

DevilsReject

DevilsReject

Cleveland, OH
February 2007

APR 24, 2008 01:30 PM

Colinism said:

DevilsReject said:

RudieCantFail said:
You can see in our ancestors, however, that their is a direct correlation between their brain size and the amount of concentrated protein (meat) that made up their diet.



Believe me, i watch the history channel/NatGeo/Discovery non-stop. Meat has played an important part in our development. What bothers me is that it seems we've hit the peak of our intelligence and are now on the downward spiral.



That cus we no eat lot meat.



i blame cell phones

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